Man mugged by fox.

[eharding]

15st man 'mugged by fox'

The Telegraph said:

Wildlife expert John Bryant...advised: “If a fox is jumping at your shopping bag you need to shout at it and chase it off, not just give it the food.

“The best thing to use is a water pistol.”

I'd have thought a shotgun would give better results.

[Northern Munkee]

I can imagine hundreds of civil servants in the London area carrying water pistols, on the off chance of being attacked by roaming gangs of foxes on the look out for trouble & garlic bread, and then risking being shot by SO19....

Perhaps this wimp should have handed over his wallet and mobile phone just to be on the safe side.

[MOTORVATOR]

" just popping to Waitrose dear"

Wallet - check
Keys - check
Phone - check

"don't forget your water pistol love"

"Oh I don't know how I'd manage without you darling"

[Hoofy]

Looks like the man was outfoxed.

[TTwiggy]

The latest – and in this case, the most rediculous – bit of fox-bashing in the media. A cynic might think that it's a way of easing the idea of hunting back into the public consciousness.

[eharding]

Hoofy said:

Looks like the man was outfoxed.

You. Naughty step. Now.

[egor110]

Comes to something when even foxes think it's beneath them to root thru your bins for food.

[Sam_68]

at the original story.

eharding said:

I'd have thought a shotgun would give better results.

It would, but I bet you wouldn't be welcomed in Tescos if you take a sawn-off with you!

'I'm only carrying it in case I meet a fox on the way home, officer'

[thinfourth2]

Mmmmm

What must his wife be like?

I normally just tell the wife that i forgot to get the garlic bread from the shop instead of inventing some weird wildlife related mugging story

[y2blade]

eharding said:

15st man 'mugged by fox'

The Telegraph said:

Wildlife expert John Bryant...advised: “If a fox is jumping at your shopping bag you need to shout at it and chase it off, not just give it the food.

“The best thing to use is a water pistol.”

I'd have thought a shotgun would give better results.

A pack of hounds and a few horses would have been more fun though

[Funk]

Stealth attacks in alleys when they know you've just been to the shops...? If it were any more cunning, you could put a tail on it and call it a f.....oh, wait...

What a wimp. I'd have kicked it in the head. It's a fox FFS. And I love garlic bread.

[DJRC]

TTwiggy said:

The latest – and in this case, the most rediculous – bit of fox-bashing in the media. A cynic might think that it's a way of easing the idea of hunting back into the public consciousness.

A dumb cynic might. Why would anyone pro hunting want to ease it back into public consciousness? Hunting carries on as per normal below the rader because there is sod all public care about it unless someone is whipping it up.

[y2blade]

DJRC said:

TTwiggy said:

The latest – and in this case, the most rediculous – bit of fox-bashing in the media. A cynic might think that it's a way of easing the idea of hunting back into the public consciousness.

A dumb cynic might. Why would anyone pro hunting want to ease it back into public consciousness? Hunting carries on as per normal below the rader because there is sod all public care about it unless someone is whipping it up.

Well said DJRC.

[y2blade]

This is just the beginning!

[Justayellowbadge]

Funk said:

Stealth attacks in alleys when they know you've just been to the shops...? If it were any more cunning, you could put a tail on it and call it a f.....oh, wait...

[TTwiggy]

DJRC said:

TTwiggy said:

The latest – and in this case, the most rediculous – bit of fox-bashing in the media. A cynic might think that it's a way of easing the idea of hunting back into the public consciousness.

A dumb cynic might. Why would anyone pro hunting want to ease it back into public consciousness? Hunting carries on as per normal below the rader because there is sod all public care about it unless someone is whipping it up.

Ah - I see what you've done here, you've looked at my post and assumed I'm anti-hunting. Nope, sorry, as someone who has lived his entire life in a City, I have no opinion either way.

But, as someone who is media savvy, I have to question the number of anti-fox stories we've seen recently (accepting that this one could be filed under 'light relief') and I might think that it's a way of moving the public opinion round to a more pro-hunting view.

[Uncle Fester]

I vaguely recall my Grandfather telling me about coming up against a very few Germans having a ‘water pistol’ in the trenches during WW1. Only instead of being cheap plastic, these were quality metal items, purpose made for squirting acid. I don’t think they were ever general issue, more of a prototype on test. I’ve never seen one and Google didn’t find anything. Perhaps that’s the kind of ‘water pistol’ needed for foxes.

He also mentioned the correct way to deal with “Hunnish war dogs” was to seize both front legs and part them sideways. You then kick very hard in the sternum. Apparently the leg joints on a dog aren’t articulated to move sideways, only forward and back. The loading transfers onto the sternum stressing it enough to break the sternum out of the ribcage when kicked. It can’t inflate the lungs with that injury, with fatal results. Obviously I’ve never tried it myself, but I suppose if it worked on an Alsatian, it will work on a fox.

Nobody is going to have a water (or acid) pistol when needed. Rather than have a human injured by a fox, perhaps it would be better for people to know how to beat it.

[egor110]

Do foxes prefer the baguette style or tear and share garlic bread?

[AJS-]

Poor fox, must have felt very socially excluded. Is it because I is red?

[Smart Mart]

Shame this didn't happen forty years ago.. could have called Vixen of Dock Green in!