Sexual Harassment in Schools

[s1962a]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/education-57411363

This is pretty shocking if true, and seems to span across all social classes/schools.

What can be done about this? I doubt punishing young kids for sharing images is the answer, although it could be part of it. Maybe better sex / relationship education with discussion around consequences and health boundaries is.

edit: typo of 'harrassment' in title - could someone amend it pls to 'harassment'

[motco]

The elephant in the room is the readily available hard core porn on the 'net. It would take a generation to put that genii back in the bottle I suspect. In my teens you occasionally saw a well-thumbed monochrome print of something 'hard' but films were almost non-existent to the general youth audience. Kids still screwed but far less than they'd want you to believe and there was always a 5/- packet of three from the bloke in the press shop to keep the little wriggly tadpoles under control. The whole social attitude to sexual matters has changed to the far more un-censored end of the spectrum. The 1960s were not liberated at ordinary street level compared with now.

[Randy Winkman]

I dont normally side with the Telegraph but they have a good article on the influence of porn today.

[rxe]

I wonder how much of this would vanish if you filtered out the "on social media" events.

I can only imagine how ghastly my peers and I would have been if we'd been able to offend kids at different schools based on "he looks like an arse" or "fancy a bit of that" remotely, and with close to zero possibility of consequences.

[Camelot1971]

Unfortunately, after reading some of the responses to another thread, where some parents on the forum thought it was nothing to worry about if a 13 year old boy blackmails a similar age girl into sharing nudes ("boys will be boys"), I don't think much will change.

[s1962a]

rxe said:

I wonder how much of this would vanish if you filtered out the "on social media" events.

I can only imagine how ghastly my peers and I would have been if we'd been able to offend kids at different schools based on "he looks like an arse" or "fancy a bit of that" remotely, and with close to zero possibility of consequences.

Would you have asked girls in your class to send you naked pics of themselves though?

[s1962a]

Camelot1971 said:

Unfortunately, after reading some of the responses to another thread, where some parents on the forum thought it was nothing to worry about if a 13 year old boy blackmails a similar age girl into sharing nudes ("boys will be boys"), I don't think much will change.

I wonder if they'd feel the same if another boy blackmailed their son into sending sexually explicit images.

[gregs656]

s1962a said:

Would you have asked girls in your class to send you naked pics of themselves though?

At least since MSN Messenger, 1999 onwards, school kids have been sharing naked pictures and web cam video over the internet. Smart phones will have just turbo charged that.

I don't know what the answer is, but better education around it can't hurt. Maybe the law needs to change so it can be decriminalised within peer groups? It must be impossible for schools to get involved at the moment because they would be obliged to inform the police?

[Dagnir]

What gets me about this is that if someone was a creep towards a girl back in my day, everyone would hear that he was a sleazy git and would be shunned by everyone. No girls would touch him ever again.

How is this not the case now?

Has it become so normalised to both sexes that the girls will shrug it off and still talk to the boys the next day in school?

Societies have invisible boundaries that are policed by unconscious consensus. On a social level, I don't see how these little sex pests are getting away with it and if they don't learn these boundaries now, then it could well be an even bigger problem later in life.

[Murph7355]

Dagnir said:

What gets me about this is that if someone was a creep towards a girl back in my day, everyone would hear that he was a sleazy git and would be shunned by everyone. No girls would touch him ever again.

How is this not the case now?

Has it become so normalised to both sexes that the girls will shrug it off and still talk to the boys the next day in school?

Societies have invisible boundaries that are policed by unconscious consensus. On a social level, I don't see how these little sex pests are getting away with it and if they don't learn these boundaries now, then it could well be an even bigger problem later in life.

It's all about the "likes".

I also suspect that adults/parents have been caught napping with the pace of change of social media/internet connectivity and typically handle it in a "bad" (though totally understandable) reactionary way, and/or simply can't be arsed parenting (one of the biggest ills in the country IMO).

[ReverendCounter]

Randy Winkman said:

I dont normally side with the Telegraph but they have a good article on the influence of porn today.

They also did another article in recent months which had comments from doctors who were being approached for advice from young women - many well under age - who had become incontinent due to anal sex.

It seems the realities of what is actually happening are much, much worse.

[motco]

Randy Winkman said:

I dont normally side with the Telegraph but they have a good article on the influence of porn today.

It is a good article and I'm very glad I am not a teenager in 21st century - it sounds terrible.

[deckster]

s1962a said:

Would you have asked girls in your class to send you naked pics of themselves though?

Is that a serious question?

I'm not proud to admit but our attitudes towards girls in the late 80s was appalling. Our conversations before 4th and 5th form discos largely revolved around how we could get hold of enough vodka to get the girls in a suitably pliant state. So yes, I'm sure we would have been asking for, and sending, nudes had the technology existed.

[633Squadron]

Once a photo/ video exists - it is nigh impossible to ensure it never sees the light of day again.

I suspect the laws will ultimately have to change.


About 10 years ago - I was hosting a BBQ for the neighbours in my street.
While doing the rounds trying to see if anyone wanted a drinks top up or more food , I overheard the group of female kids ( 10-12 ) discussing how the boys at their school were trying to pressure them into sex. And some were seriously considering complying so they wouldn't get dumped.

Who would be a parent???

[Randy Winkman]

deckster said:

s1962a said:

Would you have asked girls in your class to send you naked pics of themselves though?

Is that a serious question?

I'm not proud to admit but our attitudes towards girls in the late 80s was appalling. Our conversations before 4th and 5th form discos largely revolved around how we could get hold of enough vodka to get the girls in a suitably pliant state. So yes, I'm sure we would have been asking for, and sending, nudes had the technology existed.

Of course. People don't change from year to year. And I say that as a 50 something. But circumstances change and things become important when previously they were not so.

[404 Page not found]

I'm pretty sure boys wanting to see girls 'bits' and viasaversa has been going on since forever. The only difference is that nowadays there an electronic paper trail.

[Randy Winkman]

404 Page not found said:

I'm pretty sure boys wanting to see girls 'bits' and viasaversa has been going on since forever. The only difference is that nowadays there an electronic paper trail.

And loads, and loads, and loads, and loads, and loads, and loads of porn for them to watch first.

[nikaiyo2]

s1962a said:

Would you have asked girls in your class to send you naked pics of themselves though?

I know it’s easy to look back as an adult when such things were not available and say how terrible it is.

I think if I am being honest, there is absolutely no doubt in my mind that I would, especially if it was a socially acceptable thing among my peers.

[PeteinSQ]

As others have said this generation of boys are no worse than previous generations. That doesn't make it right though does it?

Girls shouldn't be getting eleven boys asking them for nude photos every evening should they?

I've got two sons and I'll be having strong words with them about the appropriate way to treat girls and if they cross the line and their mum finds out she'll pretty much send them into orbit.

[rxe]

s1962a said:

Would you have asked girls in your class to send you naked pics of themselves though?

Face to face - hell no, we’d have got a slap. And that I think is the point - the remoteness of social media didn’t exist when I was at school. Asking to see a girls tits from behind a keyboard is easy, actually asking her face to face is a little harder.