Calling Boss a Dhead is OK
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Discussion

Mr Pointy

Original Poster:

12,748 posts

180 months

Friday 5th September 2025
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gruffalo

8,068 posts

247 months

Friday 5th September 2025
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Mr Pointy said:
Link not working.

If you are expressing an opinion then you are entitled to air an opinion.

There may be repercussions.

cml24

1,542 posts

168 months

Friday 5th September 2025
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I'd say this specific case went the way I'd hope/expect it to (I only have the details in the article to make judgement on).

The person that was let go had no previous warnings, and called two of her superiors dheads whilst she was concerned she was about to be let go and was crying so clearly quite emotional.

The boss appears to have replied with worse language and instantly fired her.

If there were other reasons to let her go, then follow process, but a minor insult in the heat of the moment isn't a reasonable reason.

InitialDave

14,170 posts

140 months

Friday 5th September 2025
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cml24 said:
The person that was let go had no previous warnings, and called two of her superiors dheads whilst she was concerned she was about to be let go and was crying so clearly quite emotional.

The boss appears to have replied with worse language and instantly fired her.
Sounds like she wasn't wrong.

dontlookdown

2,327 posts

114 months

Friday 5th September 2025
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InitialDave said:
cml24 said:
The person that was let go had no previous warnings, and called two of her superiors dheads whilst she was concerned she was about to be let go and was crying so clearly quite emotional.

The boss appears to have replied with worse language and instantly fired her.
Sounds like she wasn't wrong.
Yup. Prob less of an insult and more a statement of fact, in this case.

otolith

64,641 posts

225 months

Friday 5th September 2025
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carl_w

10,310 posts

279 months

Friday 5th September 2025
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Bit like the old joke:
Employee: "If I told you you were a , would you fire me?"
Boss: "Of course"
Employee: "What if I thought you were a ?"
Boss: "Well I couldn't fire you for thinking something"
Employee: "In that case, I think you're a "

bigandclever

14,184 posts

259 months

Friday 5th September 2025
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gruffalo said:
Mr Pointy said:
Link not working.
PH censoring "dhead" in the URL, innit. Have a tinyurl instead .. https://tinyurl.com/373m7eew


InitialDave

14,170 posts

140 months

Friday 5th September 2025
quotequote all
"Scaffolding and brickwork company".

FFS. This is not a sector to work in if you're the type to clutch your pearls about a certain level of coarseness in people's communication.

Countdown

46,703 posts

217 months

Friday 5th September 2025
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I think this is another bonkers decision by an ET.

Your boss may well be a dhead. Calling him or her a dhead is never acceptable behaviour if you want to keep your job. I'm not sure why it wasn't regarded as gross misconduct tbh.

otolith

64,641 posts

225 months

Friday 5th September 2025
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Countdown said:
I think this is another bonkers decision by an ET.

Your boss may well be a dhead. Calling him or her a dhead is never acceptable behaviour if you want to keep your job. I'm not sure why it wasn't regarded as gross misconduct tbh.
Have you read the account in the article? Nobody comes out of it looking very professional.

Leptons

5,479 posts

197 months

Friday 5th September 2025
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My old Boss called me a once. On reflection he was probably right but the feeling was mutual. Didn’t cry about it though.

Countdown

46,703 posts

217 months

Friday 5th September 2025
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otolith said:
Countdown said:
I think this is another bonkers decision by an ET.

Your boss may well be a dhead. Calling him or her a dhead is never acceptable behaviour if you want to keep your job. I'm not sure why it wasn't regarded as gross misconduct tbh.
Have you read the account in the article? Nobody comes out of it looking very professional.
What have I missed?

I agree that neither party comes out of it looking professional but I can understand why the boss might lose their cool when a member of staff (about whom they have performance concerns) swears at them.


Evanivitch

25,582 posts

143 months

Friday 5th September 2025
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Countdown said:
otolith said:
Countdown said:
I think this is another bonkers decision by an ET.

Your boss may well be a dhead. Calling him or her a dhead is never acceptable behaviour if you want to keep your job. I'm not sure why it wasn't regarded as gross misconduct tbh.
Have you read the account in the article? Nobody comes out of it looking very professional.
What have I missed?

I agree that neither party comes out of it looking professional but I can understand why the boss might lose their cool when a member of staff (about whom they have performance concerns) swears at them.
The issue wasn't the boss swearing, it was the summary dismissal in response. This isn't unusual when a small business doesn't have a decent HR function, and I can only imagine complete stubbornness is why this got to tribunal.

otolith

64,641 posts

225 months

Friday 5th September 2025
quotequote all
Countdown said:
otolith said:
Countdown said:
I think this is another bonkers decision by an ET.

Your boss may well be a dhead. Calling him or her a dhead is never acceptable behaviour if you want to keep your job. I'm not sure why it wasn't regarded as gross misconduct tbh.
Have you read the account in the article? Nobody comes out of it looking very professional.
What have I missed?

I agree that neither party comes out of it looking professional but I can understand why the boss might lose their cool when a member of staff (about whom they have performance concerns) swears at them.
It just sounds like the situation was terribly managed and got out of hand, she blurted something stupid, he escalated. I wouldn't take kindly to someone calling me and the other directors "dheads", but I'd be more disappointed with myself at allowing the conversation to reach that point and then losing my cool. Her contract covered this situation, and it didn't cover firing her for a first offence.

article said:
The hearing was told that under the terms of her contract, she could be fired for “the provocative use of insulting or abusive language”.

However, this required she be given a prior warning. Only more serious breaches such as “threatening and intimidating language” would be gross misconduct and warrant summary dismissal.
They might have had more of a leg to stand on if the contract hadn't mentioned that situation at all.

JagLover

45,551 posts

256 months

Friday 5th September 2025
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otolith said:
Countdown said:
otolith said:
Countdown said:
I think this is another bonkers decision by an ET.

Your boss may well be a dhead. Calling him or her a dhead is never acceptable behaviour if you want to keep your job. I'm not sure why it wasn't regarded as gross misconduct tbh.
Have you read the account in the article? Nobody comes out of it looking very professional.
What have I missed?

I agree that neither party comes out of it looking professional but I can understand why the boss might lose their cool when a member of staff (about whom they have performance concerns) swears at them.
It just sounds like the situation was terribly managed and got out of hand, she blurted something stupid, he escalated. I wouldn't take kindly to someone calling me and the other directors "dheads", but I'd be more disappointed with myself at allowing the conversation to reach that point and then losing my cool. Her contract covered this situation, and it didn't cover firing her for a first offence.

article said:
The hearing was told that under the terms of her contract, she could be fired for “the provocative use of insulting or abusive language”.

However, this required she be given a prior warning. Only more serious breaches such as “threatening and intimidating language” would be gross misconduct and warrant summary dismissal.
They might have had more of a leg to stand on if the contract hadn't mentioned that situation at all.
This

The ET tribunal ruling was you had to follow correct procedure, not that it is fine for employees to describe their boss in these terms.

Sounds like a sensible decision.

DeejRC

8,525 posts

103 months

Friday 5th September 2025
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So it’s basically that you can call your boss a d1ckhead once, but not twice.

IroningMan

10,598 posts

267 months

Friday 5th September 2025
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DeejRC said:
So it’s basically that you can call your boss a d1ckhead once, but not twice.
No, it’s basically that you and your employer should adhere to the terms of the contract between you.

DeejRC

8,525 posts

103 months

Friday 5th September 2025
quotequote all
IroningMan said:
DeejRC said:
So it’s basically that you can call your boss a d1ckhead once, but not twice.
No, it’s basically that you and your employer should adhere to the terms of the contract between you.
You have negotiated yourself a good contract if you can do it 3 times…

Trevor555

5,016 posts

105 months

Friday 5th September 2025
quotequote all
Seems one sided.

If the boss had caller her a dickkopf, I'm sure she could have gone for constructive dissmissal.

But she can call boss one, and boss has to suck it up?