Kids & Pocket Money/ Cash
Discussion
Really interested to hear peoples plans/ experiences/ psychology/ thoughts of children and pocket money.
I have two children aged 10 and 12 and I'm concerned that my approach to money may affect them in the longer term. Essentially I'm a bit of a saver/ investor rather than a spender and look to foster that in my kids. For example if they get any cash for their birthday unless there is anything specific they wanted the money for then I'll take it and drop it in their Junior ISA or cash savings account. I also save monthly into their junior ISAs (as do the grandparents) so they've got between £4k-£5k each saved (not that they know that). The hope/ expectation is that they'll have £10k each when they hit 18 to use for uni/ travel/ a car.
The problem that arose at the weekend was that we were away with friends with similar aged kids. These kids get pocket money from family members (not the parents and probably about £20 a month) plus any money they get for birthday/ Christmas they keep in their piggy banks. That meant that they went into toy shops/ gift shops and just brought what they wanted on the understanding it was coming out of their money. Now what the other children purchased was what I would regard as tat and if it came home with my two it'd go into a draw in their bedroom and then probably into the bin a few months later. The issue was that my two resented the fact they couldn't just go in and buy what they want with 'their money' and it made me realise that they've never been in the position where they have to consider whether they can afford something or not or ultimately just buy tat if they want to.
We've had many discussions in our house about pocket money and my wife's view is that they need to actually do something to earn it each week/ month, which is probably fair enough. Now by no means do my two go without, for example my son has the xbox game pass and the fortnite crew pass, which is about £20 a month between the two, plus occasional v bucks purchases. He doesn't realise this though as isn't paying (or seeing me pay) with physical money.
So beyond all that background (or waffle) my question is how do you operate pocket money in your household? Is it chore based? Is it a set amount? Do you let your kids keep birthday/ Christmas money? How have you dealt with the modern day digital purchases versus the days of take your pocket money down to the newsagents to buy pro-set cards and Match magazine or Woolworths to buy Tapes/CDs/ pick n mix?
I have two children aged 10 and 12 and I'm concerned that my approach to money may affect them in the longer term. Essentially I'm a bit of a saver/ investor rather than a spender and look to foster that in my kids. For example if they get any cash for their birthday unless there is anything specific they wanted the money for then I'll take it and drop it in their Junior ISA or cash savings account. I also save monthly into their junior ISAs (as do the grandparents) so they've got between £4k-£5k each saved (not that they know that). The hope/ expectation is that they'll have £10k each when they hit 18 to use for uni/ travel/ a car.
The problem that arose at the weekend was that we were away with friends with similar aged kids. These kids get pocket money from family members (not the parents and probably about £20 a month) plus any money they get for birthday/ Christmas they keep in their piggy banks. That meant that they went into toy shops/ gift shops and just brought what they wanted on the understanding it was coming out of their money. Now what the other children purchased was what I would regard as tat and if it came home with my two it'd go into a draw in their bedroom and then probably into the bin a few months later. The issue was that my two resented the fact they couldn't just go in and buy what they want with 'their money' and it made me realise that they've never been in the position where they have to consider whether they can afford something or not or ultimately just buy tat if they want to.
We've had many discussions in our house about pocket money and my wife's view is that they need to actually do something to earn it each week/ month, which is probably fair enough. Now by no means do my two go without, for example my son has the xbox game pass and the fortnite crew pass, which is about £20 a month between the two, plus occasional v bucks purchases. He doesn't realise this though as isn't paying (or seeing me pay) with physical money.
So beyond all that background (or waffle) my question is how do you operate pocket money in your household? Is it chore based? Is it a set amount? Do you let your kids keep birthday/ Christmas money? How have you dealt with the modern day digital purchases versus the days of take your pocket money down to the newsagents to buy pro-set cards and Match magazine or Woolworths to buy Tapes/CDs/ pick n mix?
A mate of mine had a nice technique with his kids where their pocket money, gifts etc would be split into several different pots. These could be 1/4 long term savings, 1/4 educational, 1/4 toys, 1/4 sweets or whatever. They were free to spend on whatever they wanted but it would come out of the appropriate "budget".
The parents would fund most stuff as you'd expect, but if the kids wanted extra stuff they had to pay for it themselves so they got an appreciation for the value of their money and what it feels like to run out and how long it takes to build up again. The choice of pots meant that they were never in a position where everything was blown on a single piece of tat.
The parents would fund most stuff as you'd expect, but if the kids wanted extra stuff they had to pay for it themselves so they got an appreciation for the value of their money and what it feels like to run out and how long it takes to build up again. The choice of pots meant that they were never in a position where everything was blown on a single piece of tat.
I've just opened my 12y/o a bank account with HSBC. I give him £20 per month on the basis that he can buy his own tat, sweets from local shop, trips to town with his mates etc. His CTF is also with HSBC and so he can see the savings amount building up. I also incentive him to do chores for cash - £5 to do the lawn. All set up with debit card.
He and his kid bro have everything they have ever asked for: multiple consoles, iPads and oculus quests.
He saves his money, and tries get me to buy everything anyway. When I try to get him to use his money, my wife tells me not to be tight, and that I am setting a bad example. I sent him to the shop to buy some butter, he gave me the receipt,
I am now £20 per month (+ incidentals) worse off.
He and his kid bro have everything they have ever asked for: multiple consoles, iPads and oculus quests.
He saves his money, and tries get me to buy everything anyway. When I try to get him to use his money, my wife tells me not to be tight, and that I am setting a bad example. I sent him to the shop to buy some butter, he gave me the receipt,
I am now £20 per month (+ incidentals) worse off.
From about the age of 11 we were given a 'clothing allowance of £20pm that I could use to spend on whatever clothes I wanted/needed. School uniforms and underwear was provided.
It worked brilliantly. When I wanted some original Nike Air Max's, I saved for 5 months and then cherished them for the next about 15 years.
I also got around £10-12 from a paper round at around the same age. Also did other random stuff like pea picking, car washing, grass cutting to earn a little bit of money. Got my first proper job at 16 alongside A-levels.
We didn't get pocket money unless we were on holiday and we used to get £3-5 a day.
Is working odd jobs even a thing now for 10-15 year olds? or do they expect parents to pay for everything?
It worked brilliantly. When I wanted some original Nike Air Max's, I saved for 5 months and then cherished them for the next about 15 years.
I also got around £10-12 from a paper round at around the same age. Also did other random stuff like pea picking, car washing, grass cutting to earn a little bit of money. Got my first proper job at 16 alongside A-levels.
We didn't get pocket money unless we were on holiday and we used to get £3-5 a day.
Is working odd jobs even a thing now for 10-15 year olds? or do they expect parents to pay for everything?
My eldest who is 10 did household jobs for pocket money a couple of years ago and got quite good at saving her money but she has since lost interest and as such gets nothing currently, I suppose part of the reason is her only interests are watching rubbish on Youtube and playing Roblox on her tablet, neither of which cost anything.
I suspect that may change in the next 18 months when she moves to high school and starts wanting to go out with her mates on weekends.
I suspect that may change in the next 18 months when she moves to high school and starts wanting to go out with her mates on weekends.
BeeBopp said:
I've just opened my 12y/o a bank account with HSBC. I give him £20 per month on the basis that he can buy his own tat, sweets from local shop, trips to town with his mates etc. His CTF is also with HSBC and so he can see the savings amount building up. I also incentive him to do chores for cash - £5 to do the lawn. All set up with debit card.
He and his kid bro have everything they have ever asked for: multiple consoles, iPads and oculus quests.
He saves his money, and tries get me to buy everything anyway. When I try to get him to use his money, my wife tells me not to be tight, and that I am setting a bad example. I sent him to the shop to buy some butter, he gave me the receipt,
I am now £20 per month (+ incidentals) worse off.
Could have been written by me, I also give my children £20 a month each. They also have laptops, tablets and a recent iPhone each, which I bought outright and pay for their PAYG sims.He and his kid bro have everything they have ever asked for: multiple consoles, iPads and oculus quests.
He saves his money, and tries get me to buy everything anyway. When I try to get him to use his money, my wife tells me not to be tight, and that I am setting a bad example. I sent him to the shop to buy some butter, he gave me the receipt,
I am now £20 per month (+ incidentals) worse off.
They also get £200 each for Christmas and Birthdays from me, £50 for Easter as well as other money from Grandma and Grandad.
All money is paid into the Santander accounts and both have debit cards as they are 13 and 14, basically they both have hundreds and hundreds of pounds in their current accounts.
Not like that when I was their age, I couldn't imagine what it would be like to have so much money sloshing around.
I have two similar aged kids.
If I have them both £5 per week one would save some or most of it and the other one would spend the lot in one day on sweets.
Not worth the arguments and not worth the dentist bill either!
I’ll just buy them what needs buying and give them £1 or so when they want to wander to the shops for some sweets.
Money training can wait
If I have them both £5 per week one would save some or most of it and the other one would spend the lot in one day on sweets.
Not worth the arguments and not worth the dentist bill either!
I’ll just buy them what needs buying and give them £1 or so when they want to wander to the shops for some sweets.
Money training can wait
I believe pocket money is meant to teach children how to use and look after money. It's difficult but they need to be allowed to spend some as they wish and learn from their mistakes. We used to give them about £20. per month and by the time they were the age of yours we let them keep birthday and christmas money. Ours had their own accounts which they could access which from memory could be opened from the age of 11. It's also a good idea to put some in junior isas which cannot be accessed until 18 so they can see the benefit of growing investments.
My three boys are now all in their twenties and seem to have a healthy attitude to money, whereas my parents encouraged me to save my money then didn't let me spend it. Consequently I am a miserly old bloke.
My three boys are now all in their twenties and seem to have a healthy attitude to money, whereas my parents encouraged me to save my money then didn't let me spend it. Consequently I am a miserly old bloke.
I dont give my so pocket money (he's now 15) I have a Revolut card set up on his and my iPhones, using Apple Pay I can transfer money onto his card, and he can only spend what is on it. When he's going out with mates to the cinema etc I will transfer say £20 to his Revolut card so he has enough for bus fare, cinema ticket and buy a drink from a shop. I probably put an average of £40 a month onto it.
Xmas and birthday money he saves in his money box, but ends up spending it a few weeks later when a PS5/Xbox games comes out that he wants.
For bigger things he needs, we just buy for him, but I make him wait a while and until he has fully researched what he wants, as he can change his mind from one day to the next.
Xmas and birthday money he saves in his money box, but ends up spending it a few weeks later when a PS5/Xbox games comes out that he wants.
For bigger things he needs, we just buy for him, but I make him wait a while and until he has fully researched what he wants, as he can change his mind from one day to the next.
Hmm.... Must confess to being quite miserly 
They (7&9) get £8 a month each, split into savings, charity and spending. They are expected to do some standard chores but they get the money regardless. Chores being expected since we are a family, they are not paid for it. We do agree money for additional one off chores / jobs. But the blighters drive a hard bargain.
Birthday/Christmas money goes into the spend pot.
Tat, sweets on days out and console games (always second hand) come out of the spend pot.
I have managed to get a pizza dinner out of both of them
(Dad tax)
FV
They (7&9) get £8 a month each, split into savings, charity and spending. They are expected to do some standard chores but they get the money regardless. Chores being expected since we are a family, they are not paid for it. We do agree money for additional one off chores / jobs. But the blighters drive a hard bargain.
Birthday/Christmas money goes into the spend pot.
Tat, sweets on days out and console games (always second hand) come out of the spend pot.
I have managed to get a pizza dinner out of both of them
(Dad tax)
FV
Not pocket money as such as he will spend it on sweets and drink in an instance, he is 12 but any money he does receive for Christmas/Birthday etc goes into his bank account and we will only let him spend it on stuff he will use such as Playstation games, lego etc. We buy his cloths, I pay for his PS subscription, Fortnite battle pass and Ill also give him £10 quid every know and then when he is playing out as I am desperate for him to go out and play rather than try and sit on his computer all day.
As his Birthday is December and he has to wait 11 months from Christmas. I have told him ill buy him FIFA every year (September time) and if he wants any other games when its not his Birthday or Christmas it comes out of his own money. He wants F1 2022 which is out in July and he has the money for that from Christmas last year.
As his Birthday is December and he has to wait 11 months from Christmas. I have told him ill buy him FIFA every year (September time) and if he wants any other games when its not his Birthday or Christmas it comes out of his own money. He wants F1 2022 which is out in July and he has the money for that from Christmas last year.
When my kids get money I do 50/50.
Save 50% on everything over £20, the other 50% it’s up to them what they spend it on. It doesn’t matter where the money comes from (birthdays/Xmas, etc)
They need to learn to be responsible, if they want to spend it all on sweets they know that there is no money left and once the sweets are finished then that’s it. If they want to spend it on Roblox then it’s up to them.
It’s about balance, I’d rather see my my kids happy at a young age feeling proud that they got to buy something with their own money with out parental input
Save 50% on everything over £20, the other 50% it’s up to them what they spend it on. It doesn’t matter where the money comes from (birthdays/Xmas, etc)
They need to learn to be responsible, if they want to spend it all on sweets they know that there is no money left and once the sweets are finished then that’s it. If they want to spend it on Roblox then it’s up to them.
It’s about balance, I’d rather see my my kids happy at a young age feeling proud that they got to buy something with their own money with out parental input
When I was a kid I got to spend or save any birthday/xmas money, the decision was mines.
I always spent it, and always have memories of the excitement of having 100 quid to spend on anything.
Save in the background for your children, let them spend their birthday and xmas money on anything they like.
As for pocket money, I'd ensure some errands or chores are completed in order for that pocket money to be earned.
I always spent it, and always have memories of the excitement of having 100 quid to spend on anything.
Save in the background for your children, let them spend their birthday and xmas money on anything they like.
As for pocket money, I'd ensure some errands or chores are completed in order for that pocket money to be earned.
egomeister said:
A mate of mine had a nice technique with his kids where their pocket money, gifts etc would be split into several different pots. These could be 1/4 long term savings, 1/4 educational, 1/4 toys, 1/4 sweets or whatever. They were free to spend on whatever they wanted but it would come out of the appropriate "budget".
The parents would fund most stuff as you'd expect, but if the kids wanted extra stuff they had to pay for it themselves so they got an appreciation for the value of their money and what it feels like to run out and how long it takes to build up again. The choice of pots meant that they were never in a position where everything was blown on a single piece of tat.
I follow a similar concept to this. Teaches them to budget, think longer term but also indulge within an acceptable limit. The parents would fund most stuff as you'd expect, but if the kids wanted extra stuff they had to pay for it themselves so they got an appreciation for the value of their money and what it feels like to run out and how long it takes to build up again. The choice of pots meant that they were never in a position where everything was blown on a single piece of tat.
Our approach has several elements:
Pocket money: £1 per week for each year old they are (so £12 per week when 12). This is to teach them to save for things and to choose what to buy.
Chores: extra money can be earnt by doing jobs like mowing the lawn or cleaning the cars, typically another £10. This is to teach them that if you really want extra money they can work hard and earn it.
Grades: Termly grades are rewarded with £2 for every grade over B. GCSE and Alevels have a scale of reward based on grades that generates £500-1000 which they could spend as they liked. This is to teach them that really hard work has big rewards.
Clothes etc: Anything esssential we pay for, but if they want something fancier - like a particular sort of football boot rather than a standard one - then we pay the equivalent of the basic one and they can top up the extra. This is to teach them to make choices about whether they needed the fancier item or not.
Gifts: larger sums of birthday or Xmas money go into long term savings. Smaller sums they can keep. This is to teach them not to rely on getting large sums they hadn’t earned.
Other: We do bend the rules occasionally, such as giving them some extra spending money for holiday, or putting in more so they could get the boots they really wanted. This is to teach them Mum & Dad are nice!
Finally, to role model how money works, I’ve also tried to make visible some of my own financial situation. There’s no great need these days for me to be very careful on spending when I’m starting a new venture, or to wait for success before going on a nice holiday. But I still like to do it as a discipline and I tell them why as I think it’s good they see that I manage my money according to income.
It works too: the younger one asks me how the business is going because she knows once it takes off she’ll get a nice holiday!
Pocket money: £1 per week for each year old they are (so £12 per week when 12). This is to teach them to save for things and to choose what to buy.
Chores: extra money can be earnt by doing jobs like mowing the lawn or cleaning the cars, typically another £10. This is to teach them that if you really want extra money they can work hard and earn it.
Grades: Termly grades are rewarded with £2 for every grade over B. GCSE and Alevels have a scale of reward based on grades that generates £500-1000 which they could spend as they liked. This is to teach them that really hard work has big rewards.
Clothes etc: Anything esssential we pay for, but if they want something fancier - like a particular sort of football boot rather than a standard one - then we pay the equivalent of the basic one and they can top up the extra. This is to teach them to make choices about whether they needed the fancier item or not.
Gifts: larger sums of birthday or Xmas money go into long term savings. Smaller sums they can keep. This is to teach them not to rely on getting large sums they hadn’t earned.
Other: We do bend the rules occasionally, such as giving them some extra spending money for holiday, or putting in more so they could get the boots they really wanted. This is to teach them Mum & Dad are nice!
Finally, to role model how money works, I’ve also tried to make visible some of my own financial situation. There’s no great need these days for me to be very careful on spending when I’m starting a new venture, or to wait for success before going on a nice holiday. But I still like to do it as a discipline and I tell them why as I think it’s good they see that I manage my money according to income.
It works too: the younger one asks me how the business is going because she knows once it takes off she’ll get a nice holiday!
Mine (8 & 10) each have their own Revolut accounts and cards. They are paid £8 and £10 per week respectively. This is their money to do with as they wish, whether that is save for something they really want, or splurge on plastic tat. They are actually very good at the saving part (I never was). I think in part it is because it is not physical money sitting in their rooms, and they can track the accounts from their phones/tablets so can see their little pots growing.
There is no fee for children's Revolut accounts if the main account holder is a Metal customer - unlike Go Henry which I believe has quite a steep standing charge.
There is no fee for children's Revolut accounts if the main account holder is a Metal customer - unlike Go Henry which I believe has quite a steep standing charge.
Mine did jobs and chores from the age of 5 for pocket money. What he has learnt above all else is value, what is cheap and what is expensive. Our views on that don't always align and he still buys the odd bit of cheap tat, but then learns from it after.
I still put money aside, some that he knows about, and will buy reading books for him without making him pay.
My FIL did give him money whenever he saw him, for various reasons I never objected but it did take away some of that value learning and he instead expected a handout.
I still put money aside, some that he knows about, and will buy reading books for him without making him pay.
My FIL did give him money whenever he saw him, for various reasons I never objected but it did take away some of that value learning and he instead expected a handout.
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