Earning more than you SO, how do you split the bills?
Discussion
Or earning less than them. This isn't about protecting myself, but would like to know some experiences and suggestions of how you split the living costs with your significant other if there is a big gap between your two salaries.
I earn more than my wife but most of this difference is in my bonus structure, at the moment we split the household bills down the middle and that is all run through a separate account. Once we've both transferred in our half whatever she has left is for her to spend as she wishes, and same for me. We're also open with each other about our earnings and borrowings. Both work full time and no children yet.
The past couple of years since my earnings increased so much I have spent my extra by paying for our holidays or home improvements. Not on red sportscars or other 'me me me' rewards. I suppose I'm also conscious that my pension pot grows better than hers.
So how do you do it? Do you pay a higher percentage on the mortgage? Do you have an extra rainy day fund that you can/do share? How is the pay gap bridged so that one isn't having a considerably easier time than the other.
I earn more than my wife but most of this difference is in my bonus structure, at the moment we split the household bills down the middle and that is all run through a separate account. Once we've both transferred in our half whatever she has left is for her to spend as she wishes, and same for me. We're also open with each other about our earnings and borrowings. Both work full time and no children yet.
The past couple of years since my earnings increased so much I have spent my extra by paying for our holidays or home improvements. Not on red sportscars or other 'me me me' rewards. I suppose I'm also conscious that my pension pot grows better than hers.
So how do you do it? Do you pay a higher percentage on the mortgage? Do you have an extra rainy day fund that you can/do share? How is the pay gap bridged so that one isn't having a considerably easier time than the other.
We opened a joint account as soon as we moved in together and pool both of our salaries.
We talk to each other if one of us wants to make a significant purchase.
There have been times when one of us has had a higher income than the other and vice versa. It works for us, I couldn't be doing with having to work out who owes what to each other every month.
We talk to each other if one of us wants to make a significant purchase.
There have been times when one of us has had a higher income than the other and vice versa. It works for us, I couldn't be doing with having to work out who owes what to each other every month.
We also put it all in one pot and always have done. There have been times (i.e Mat leave) where my wife wasn't putting anything in and she's always been part time since having kids.
I have sometimes looked at the split, perhaps when she moans I have bought something, but when i factor the % difference she doesn't earn enough to cover the bills anyway so no point implementing anything for us.
What I will say is if we hadn't pulled resources from day 1 then we wouldn't have the type of house or the freedoms of my wife working part time. This worked for us as we wanted a nice house but I imagine if you both want to achieve very different things it would be worth splitting finances.
I have sometimes looked at the split, perhaps when she moans I have bought something, but when i factor the % difference she doesn't earn enough to cover the bills anyway so no point implementing anything for us.
What I will say is if we hadn't pulled resources from day 1 then we wouldn't have the type of house or the freedoms of my wife working part time. This worked for us as we wanted a nice house but I imagine if you both want to achieve very different things it would be worth splitting finances.
When my Mrs first moved in with me I already owned the house, she just started paying a monthly amount to me for her share of the bills. She'd been renting previously so it seemed a sensible way to do it and was way less than her previous rent.
Now we just have a joint account both salaries go in to. Much less hassle. Don't really bother separate accounts except for some old savings accounts.
Now we just have a joint account both salaries go in to. Much less hassle. Don't really bother separate accounts except for some old savings accounts.
We have a joint account for bills that we pay a proportion of of salaries into. I earn more than my wife as since having kids she works part time. If she were full time it would be very similar.
For a time she did pay get paid more than me and we just paid the same set amount in. We didn't really think to much about it post marriage and particularly kids. I tend to pay most of if not all of the big ticket items, cars, holidays and so on.
I do actually like the idea of putting everything into the same pot and then each taking the same amount out for savings, pocket money or whatever.
Really I'd you're married what's yours is hers and vice versa.
For a time she did pay get paid more than me and we just paid the same set amount in. We didn't really think to much about it post marriage and particularly kids. I tend to pay most of if not all of the big ticket items, cars, holidays and so on.
I do actually like the idea of putting everything into the same pot and then each taking the same amount out for savings, pocket money or whatever.
Really I'd you're married what's yours is hers and vice versa.
supersport said:
Daaaveee said:
MrBig said:
Everything goes in the pot. All bills and savings go from there and we pay ourselves 'pocket money' every month. Keeps it simple and fair.
Same, nice and simple, works well.Everything is "ours" not more mine or more hers.
We've always put the same amount into a joint account and paid all household bills from that along with a joint savings account which is then used for "house" related stuff. Holidays have been paid for by one or the other of us or been split depending on who is earning what at the time. Everything else left was for us to do with as we please so no arguments about shoes/bikes/cars etc.
At various times one or the other of us has earned more or had better bonuses so who paid for meals out and luxuries more often has changed more than once.
One thing that we have always been a stickler for is keeping our monthly household expenses at a level that if one of us was out of work we could get by on a single salary but thankfully have never had do to that.
At various times one or the other of us has earned more or had better bonuses so who paid for meals out and luxuries more often has changed more than once.
One thing that we have always been a stickler for is keeping our monthly household expenses at a level that if one of us was out of work we could get by on a single salary but thankfully have never had do to that.
We have a joint account for mortgage and regular bills. We pay into that in proportion to our take home pay (NB I earn more, but I’m in a higher tax bracket, so the % difference changes after tax).
We own our house 50/50 - well actually a little more nuanced than that but that’s because I agreed to let her protect an inheritance that has formed part of the payment.
The rest remains in our personal accounts. She seems to do lots of food expenditure. I seem to get the big expenditure (holidays, house improvements).
Overall it works, and we have a straightforward and open relationship. We ought probably to take another look at it, but then we ought to get married after 26 years together but why change what isn’t broken?
We own our house 50/50 - well actually a little more nuanced than that but that’s because I agreed to let her protect an inheritance that has formed part of the payment.
The rest remains in our personal accounts. She seems to do lots of food expenditure. I seem to get the big expenditure (holidays, house improvements).
Overall it works, and we have a straightforward and open relationship. We ought probably to take another look at it, but then we ought to get married after 26 years together but why change what isn’t broken?
Well it's comforting to know we're not the only ones who do it this way. Personally I don't want it all in one account because I don't want either of us to feel like we have to justify our personal expenditure. I don't care how much she spends shopping or out with the girls, she is entitled to her privacy.
Neither of us is penny pinching and there is never a "but I paid for dinner last time" moment. Last we spoke we were happy with this setup, but what got me thinking about it is she did tell me she was worrying about money because of how much our next holiday is costing me because I'm paying for it. A concern I don't share.
Neither of us is penny pinching and there is never a "but I paid for dinner last time" moment. Last we spoke we were happy with this setup, but what got me thinking about it is she did tell me she was worrying about money because of how much our next holiday is costing me because I'm paying for it. A concern I don't share.
My wife earns a bit less than me currently but will catch up over the next few years. She insists on paying for half of everything house related. I respect her decision so we have a joint account that we each put the same amount into and then the rest of our money is ours to do with as we please. Practically in the past she would let me pay for more when we were on holiday or out for dinner but as she’s caught up earnings wise she’s now more insistent on keeping things even. It works for us but we don’t have kids or an onerous mortgage so I can see why it wouldn’t work for all or even many.
We don't have a "this is mine, I earned it" attitude. It's our house, our money, etc. We do in fact have separate current accounts, but that's just for want of dealing with the faff of organising any other arrangement. My wife deals with most of the household bills and occasionally I get a WhatsApp from her saying "bung me some cash" so I bung her some cash. Any significant spending decisions get discussed, because why wouldn't you discuss something that affects your partner? It's rather what being a partner means.
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