Pre Nup agreement
Author
Discussion

Simon Brooks

Original Poster:

1,527 posts

275 months

Saturday 25th March 2023
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Slightly different to previous prenup threads

Let me explain, basically number one child is getting married this year, their intended is fully aware of the assets we (parents) have, So therefore looking to create a prenup where the main focus is on protecting any inherited assets/properties/monies etc etc my offspring will eventually get. Their intended is absolutely fine with the concept of a prenup and fully understands our concerns should the marriage fail at some point in the future

Can anyone point me in the right direction that doesnt result in a huge invoice from a lawyer for what I feel is a fairly simple task

Please no lectures, just looking for someone thay may have had this issue in the past

cheers


jonsp

1,549 posts

180 months

Saturday 25th March 2023
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Seems to be an obvious question, what sort of age are you. Are you likely to be checking out short/medium term?

Simon Brooks

Original Poster:

1,527 posts

275 months

Saturday 25th March 2023
quotequote all
jonsp said:
Seems to be an obvious question, what sort of age are you. Are you likely to be checking out short/medium term?
early 60's

Monkeylegend

28,563 posts

255 months

Saturday 25th March 2023
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If the assets are worth enough to protect you really should be getting legal advice from a solicitor rather than penny pinching and relying on what is likely to be personal opinion rather than the correct legal advice from randoms on the internet.

Beware of Kestrals.

Panamax

8,537 posts

58 months

Saturday 25th March 2023
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Fairly simple task? That's the wrong starting point. You need to find a competent solicitor well versed in these matters and expect to pay single figure thousands, because,
  • BOTH parties to the agreement need independent legal advice. You'll probably end up paying for two lots of solicitors to get it done.
  • There needs to be a pretty exhaustive process of listing out the assets and inheritance expectations of both parties.
And never forget that when grand-kids are involved or later arrive on the scene the picture can change significantly.

Is it worth doing? Yes, despite the cost.
Is it worth doing on a corner-cutting basis? No.
Do it properly or don't do it at all.

pequod

8,997 posts

162 months

Saturday 25th March 2023
quotequote all
Simon Brooks said:
Slightly different to previous prenup threads

Let me explain, basically number one child is getting married this year, their intended is fully aware of the assets we (parents) have, So therefore looking to create a prenup where the main focus is on protecting any inherited assets/properties/monies etc etc my offspring will eventually get. Their intended is absolutely fine with the concept of a prenup and fully understands our concerns should the marriage fail at some point in the future

Can anyone point me in the right direction that doesnt result in a huge invoice from a lawyer for what I feel is a fairly simple task.

Please no lectures, just looking for someone thay may have had this issue in the past

cheers
If, as you suggest, you have a substantial estate which a potential marriage between your Son and his Bride and their future together, which may dissolve into a legal dispute over what he may, or may not, inherit, I would respectfully suggest spending a few quid with a knowledgeable solicitor in such matters, may be you best investment?

These things are dealt with by the legal profession, not by asking opinions on a motoring forum!

jonsp

1,549 posts

180 months

Saturday 25th March 2023
quotequote all
OK given your age if he's interested in inheritance he'd obviously be taking the long view, sorry to be blunt you've probably got 20 years on you.

Wouldn't the obvious answer be to trust your daughter's instincts - she loves the guy is assuming the marriage will work out and wants to share her life with him. Financially and otherwise.

Unless you've got some reason to mistrust the guy and/or mistrust you daughter's instincts?

Simon Brooks

Original Poster:

1,527 posts

275 months

Saturday 25th March 2023
quotequote all
I am fully aware of the pitfalls and limitations of seeking advice on a web based forum, however I said no lectures and closed with a very clear note that I was looking for someone that may have had this problem in the past.

Thank you for all the positive contributions, however I will now remove my dunce hat and seek legal advice as I hadn't thought of that !!!!!


Simon Brooks

Original Poster:

1,527 posts

275 months

Saturday 25th March 2023
quotequote all
jonsp said:
OK given your age if he's interested in inheritance he'd obviously be taking the long view, sorry to be blunt you've probably got 20 years on you.

Wouldn't the obvious answer be to trust your daughter's instincts - she loves the guy is assuming the marriage will work out and wants to share her life with him. Financially and otherwise.

Unless you've got some reason to mistrust the guy and/or mistrust you daughter's instincts?
no reason whatsoever to mistrust either of my childrens choice of partner, however I would very much like my hard work to remain within direct control of my offspring and who they may 'want' to share thier inheritance with, not be fighting for it, if it came to it. Hope this adds a little clarity to my thought process

Alexandra

440 posts

216 months

Saturday 25th March 2023
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My husband and I have/had a pre nup, although we're based in the US so it's almost certainly incomparable if you're in the UK. It was largely to prevent him from acquiring an interest in my business at the time, not that he wanted that anyway.

I can't advise on the law but would recommend you find attorneys that specialise in that field as you don't want issues later on if it's contested. Both parties need to have independent lawyers, otherwise there's a conflict of interest and it's doomed to fail, or kill the relationship. Also, you need to be completely honest with the conversations as this is a tricky enough topic to broach at the best of time.

Besides that, I'm happy to answer any questions about living with pre-nups if you have any.

pequod

8,997 posts

162 months

Saturday 25th March 2023
quotequote all
Simon Brooks said:
I am fully aware of the pitfalls and limitations of seeking advice on a web based forum, however I said no lectures and closed with a very clear note that I was looking for someone that may have had this problem in the past.

Thank you for all the positive contributions, however I will now remove my dunce hat and seek legal advice as I hadn't thought of that !!!!!
Understood. However, every situation is different, and a professional opinion is the best way forward. Hopefully, this will never be an issue and I wish you and your family a long, and happy life together.

PQ

Monkeylegend

28,563 posts

255 months

Saturday 25th March 2023
quotequote all
Simon Brooks said:
I am fully aware of the pitfalls and limitations of seeking advice on a web based forum, however I said no lectures and closed with a very clear note that I was looking for someone that may have had this problem in the past.

Thank you for all the positive contributions, however I will now remove my dunce hat and seek legal advice as I hadn't thought of that !!!!!
Each case will be different and I would guess that the advice from somebody who has had the problem in the past will be the same as you have received already.

Not sure why you are being childish but there you go, flounce almost complete hehe

alscar

8,351 posts

237 months

Saturday 25th March 2023
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Wasn’t clear whether son or daughter but not sure matters.
We had a similar discussion with “ ourselves “ when we redid / updated our wills and decided not to do anything different other than still leave our estate to our 3 children equally with the conventional should any predecease us then the estate goes to the survivors in equal shares.
My eldest is married with a baby the other two are currently single.


anonymous-user

78 months

Saturday 25th March 2023
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A pre nup needs to be done with a specialist solicitor. If the pre nup is drawn up fairly, then a court won't have any problems with it if anything goes awry. But be careful that a pre nup can't be discriminatory towards any children.

theboss

7,409 posts

243 months

Saturday 25th March 2023
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The way it was explained to me, pre-nups are really only given consideration than adhered to by their letter. They certainly don’t guarantee any sort of ring-fencing of assets in a future divorce, but serve as an indication of intent. A court can still distribute assets as it sees fit.

Also bear in mind unforeseen situations which could throw a real curveball like your offspring dying after an inheritance and the spouse then remarrying with your legacy potentially leaving the family entirely.

There may be other options which give you greater assurances and better “reach” after your own demise eg discretionary inheritance trust.

In any case the right legal consultant would be able advise on any such options. I’m just recycling what I was advised when remarrying with a significant (to me) capital windfall on the horizon. I didn’t take one in the end so God help me if I ever end up regretting it!



Edited by theboss on Saturday 25th March 20:44

Ziplobb

1,547 posts

308 months

Saturday 25th March 2023
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Monkeylegend said:
If the assets are worth enough to protect you really should be getting legal advice from a solicitor rather than penny pinching and relying on what is likely to be personal opinion rather than the correct legal advice from randoms on the internet.

Beware of Kestrals.
this if its a million or so why are your worried ?
if it 5/10 then seek legal advice from a decent Solicitor

TwigtheWonderkid

48,187 posts

174 months

Sunday 26th March 2023
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Not sure you even need a pre nup. My understanding was that inheritances coming to a married person do not become part of jointly owned assets so long as they are kept separate and not blended in with family finances.

Of course, keeping large sums of money totally separate from the family money isn't always easy.

Mogul

3,061 posts

247 months

Sunday 26th March 2023
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Sounds like you need to put some thought into fine-tuning (or indeed, writing) your will.

Post-nups are more likely to be enforceable than pre-nups.

‘Marital property’ rules differ in England and Scotland, if relevant.


Edited by Mogul on Sunday 26th March 15:01

Pierre2k

54 posts

69 months

Sunday 26th March 2023
quotequote all
alscar said:
Wasn’t clear whether son or daughter but not sure matters.
We had a similar discussion with “ ourselves “ when we redid / updated our wills and decided not to do anything different other than still leave our estate to our 3 children equally with the conventional should any predecease us then the estate goes to the survivors in equal shares.
My eldest is married with a baby the other two are currently single.
Taking things slightly off-topic, but your comment about it being split equally "with the conventional....goes to the survivors in equal shares", jumped out of me because a similar arrangement caused all sorts of problems when my gran died a few years ago. Not sure I'd consider it "conventional".

Don't get me wrong here, your financial affairs are your own, and up to you what you do. Certainly don't need to follow the views of some random bloke on the internet. However, what you've pitched creates a scenario where, say your eldest with the baby dies before you. The baby, your granddaughter/grandson, is effectively entirely cut out of your Will? They don't get their parent's share of your estate? That might be what you want, but it strikes me as remarkably unfair?

Personally, I'd have said the fairest, and most conventional, arrangement would be that if you have 3 kids, they each inherit a third of your estate. If one is unfortunately deceased before you, their children inherit that third due to their parent, split equally between them. I'm a father to 2 kids myself, and I'd hate to think that if both had families, one family would be cut out of my Will solely by virtue of them being unfortunate enough to have lost their Mum/Dad? It's a double whammy - lose a parent early AND be screwed over in your grandfather's/grandmother's Will. The exception would be if your children never had families of their own - in that case, fair enough, their share would be split between the others.

Catastrophic Poo

6,025 posts

210 months

Sunday 26th March 2023
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Monkeylegend said:
Simon Brooks said:
I am fully aware of the pitfalls and limitations of seeking advice on a web based forum, however I said no lectures and closed with a very clear note that I was looking for someone that may have had this problem in the past.

Thank you for all the positive contributions, however I will now remove my dunce hat and seek legal advice as I hadn't thought of that !!!!!
Each case will be different and I would guess that the advice from somebody who has had the problem in the past will be the same as you have received already.

Not sure why you are being childish but there you go, flounce almost complete hehe
hehe

Usually if it’s a reasonable amount (and therefore worth the hassle) you’ll already have the contacts who you’d ask. At the very least you would have a trusted recommendation, rather than a bunch of stair-dominators on PH biggrin