I learnt something important tonight.

[Emeye]

1) Every man should have a jar or box-o-crap-n-random-screws-n-nails-n-stuff as it will always contain that vital thing you need and save your life.

2) I will not be defeated by DIY even if it is 2am.

3) The car-park at Tesco should be better lit......

[Chuffer]

Emeye said:

1) Every man should have a jar or box-o-crap-n-random-screws-n-nails-n-stuff as it will always contain that vital thing you need and save your life.

2) I will not be defeated by DIY even if it is 2am.

3) The car-park at Tesco should be better lit......

Re: No.3 I hope you didn't hit one of those green coloured camouflaged bollards that are supposedly there to stop you hitting another vehicle, yet in the evening are almost impossible to see.



ETA. Just seen it's an alloy problem...

Edited by Chuffer on Friday 23 July 02:30

[HOGEPH]

Important things a man has to learn.

4) Don't tell the wife that her new jeans make her arse look fat.

Edited by HOGEPH on Friday 23 July 07:21

[t11ner]

HOGEPH said:

Important things a man has to learn.

4) Don't tell the wife that her new jeans make her arse look fat.

Edited by HOGEPH on Friday 23 July 07:21

I agree, it's important that she understands that it's the size of her big arse that makes it look fat, nothing to do with the jeans.

[JMGS4]

HOGEPH said:

Important things a man has to learn.
4) Don't tell the wife that her new jeans make her arse look fat.

WRONG!! DO tell her,then you'll not have to pay for them!

[Grey Ghost]

Emeye said:

1) Every man should have a jar or box-o-crap-n-random-screws-n-nails-n-stuff as it will always contain that vital thing you need and save your life.

I have one of these, brilliant it is too

[Reload]

JMGS4 said:

HOGEPH said:

Important things a man has to learn.
4) Don't tell the wife that her new jeans make her arse look fat.

WRONG!! DO tell her,then you'll not have to pay for them!

But then you have to buy her dinner later to make up for it. And you'll never be allowed to forget it. Ever.

[Timmy35]

t11ner said:

HOGEPH said:

Important things a man has to learn.

4) Don't tell the wife that her new jeans make her arse look fat.

Edited by HOGEPH on Friday 23 July 07:21

I agree, it's important that she understands that it's the size of her big arse that makes it look fat, nothing to do with the jeans.

many a true word spoken on PH.

[Andy no gooder]

HOGEPH said:

Important things a man has to learn.

4) Don't tell the wife that her new jeans make her arse look fat.

Edited by HOGEPH on Friday 23 July 07:21

Ha ha reminds me of what i said to the missus the other day.

She seemed to have a bigger bust than usual so

Me. Have you got a push up bra on?

OH. Yes why?

Me. Oh nothing just noticed they got bigger.

OH. Oh ok

Me. Have you got a push up bra on your thighs?

OH.

ME.

[Flintstone]

Andy no gooder said:

Missus joke...

Sure you didn't have the conversation where she wants breast implants and you told her to rub tissue up and down her cleavage several times a day instead?

Wife: "Will that make my tits bigger?"
Husband" "Well it's worked on your arse"

Emeye said:

1) Every man should have a jar or box-o-crap-n-random-screws-n-nails-n-stuff as it will always contain that vital thing you need and save your life.

You mean one of these?

[4mo]

Grey Ghost said:

Emeye said:

1) Every man should have a jar or box-o-crap-n-random-screws-n-nails-n-stuff as it will always contain that vital thing you need and save your life.

I have one of these, brilliant it is too

I also have one of those, it's called the garage

[Emeye]

Did someone really move this thread to the homes and DIY thread?!

[herbialfa]

Thought for the day!................

Farting in a lift is wrong on so many levels!

[annodomini2]

4mo said:

Grey Ghost said:

Emeye said:

1) Every man should have a jar or box-o-crap-n-random-screws-n-nails-n-stuff as it will always contain that vital thing you need and save your life.

I have one of these, brilliant it is too

I also have one of those, it's called the garage

So do I, unfortunately the jar is usually tidier than the garage

[Flintstone]

herbialfa said:

Thought for the day!................

Farting in a lift is wrong on so many levels!

Mock The Week, 22/7/2010

[anonymous-user]

Flintstone said:

You mean one of these?

Arhh, I miss mine, they all went to the tip when we moved. That jar could have helped me so many times since, why is it the nano second you bin one you need its entire contents?

[jas xjr]

Grey Ghost said:

Emeye said:

1) Every man should have a jar or box-o-crap-n-random-screws-n-nails-n-stuff as it will always contain that vital thing you need and save your life.

I have one of these, brilliant it is too

+1

saved me many a time, a few times by the roadside too

[Simpo Two]

Emeye said:

1) Every man should have a jar or box-o-crap-n-random-screws-n-nails-n-stuff as it will always contain that vital thing you need and save your life.

I can improve on that. You need all sizes and gauges of screws and nails in individual boxes. Don't forget that nails come in french and oval, and screws come in steel and brass.

You will need a lot of boxes!

[Flintstone]

Simpo Two said:

Emeye said:

1) Every man should have a jar or box-o-crap-n-random-screws-n-nails-n-stuff as it will always contain that vital thing you need and save your life.

I can improve on that. You need all sizes and gauges of screws and nails in individual boxes. Don't forget that nails come in french and oval, and screws come in steel and brass.

You will need a lot of boxes!

The sorted, ordered and categorised screws, nails, nuts, bolts and fixings all live in drawer units but The Pot Of Muchly Usefulness often has that little plastic nut or hinge for a perfect bodge.

[Simpo Two]

'Perfect bodge' is an oxymoron surely? If it was perfect it wouldn't be a bodge...!

I suppose the Pot of Muchly Usefulness is a kind of DIY stem cell - it is undifferentiated, and as the pot grows in size, then it becomes possible to split off hinges etc into new pots.