Offensive political limericks

[EnglishTony]

As it seems that we live in an age where being the author of offensive political limericks is no barrier to high office please accept the following as my audition for a cabinet position

There once was a Foreign Secretary called Johnson
Whose offensive limerick a competition had won
His rhyme was a hit
Although it was st
And they had to clean up the mess with a tampon

There once was a Prime Minister called May
Who was disappointed by a roll in the hay
With a trendy young banker
Whom she thought was a wker
And who would subsequently turn out to be gay

There once was a Brexit Minister called Davies
Who had no idea where reality actually is
As blind as a bat
As mad as a hat
Because he was snorting huge lines of whizz

Anybody else care to audition?

[EnglishTony]

Please file the following under "Don't give it out if you can't take it

There once was a former called Tony English
Who was turned down applying to be Irish
They said no
And told him to go
'cos they thought he was taking the pish

[LaurasOtherHalf]

Don't give up the day job

[EnglishTony]

LaurasOtherHalf said:

Don't give up the day job

Thanks for that, I will miss you too when I am selected as Minister of Offensive Behaviour

[ant427]

An unelected leader
after Brown no way
it's undemocratic
of that i'm emphatic
oh hello Theresa May

[2gins]

There once was a man known as Farage
He engaged with the Germans in marriage
He hates the EU
And campaigns for adieu
While knocking one out in his garage



Angela Eagle did trigger
A leadership contest with vigour
She said "Corbyn out!
He ain't doin' nowt!"
And got fked by her constituency party, if there were any justice.

There was an old soak called Jean-Claude
Whose EU adventure was flawed
He claims on expenses
For wine bars and wenches
'cos he know's he's not long in this fraud

Well we can hope can't we ...

Edited by 2gins on Friday 15th July 13:04

Edited by 2gins on Friday 15th July 13:15

[EnglishTony]