Help with a best man's speech

[Noodle1982]

As per the title really.

I've got the privilege of being the best man at my mates wedding soon. The only problem is i'm struggling with the speech.

The issue is that he hasnt really done anything i can think of that would make good anecdotes. He hasn't joined us on any lad's holidays over the years, has been on very few nights out with us and has always chosen the homely life in a relationship rather than playing the field. I'm also a bit restricted with how i deliver the speech i.e cant be offensive or lewd.

I've helped other friends write their speeches and they've turned out great but those speeches had free reign regarding insults and offensiveness as well as plenty of anecdotes and experiences.

So yeah, i'm kinda stuck on this one. Any help?

[davepoth]

When I've done this the room was full of churchgoing pensioners so lewd stuff was out too. It doesn't need to be like that anyway, and a really good speech won't need to be rude.

When you think of your mate what comes to mind? Whatever that is, use it as a theme for the speech, and keep coming back to it. Make sure any jokes are kind to him, as it's his special day; if anything, telling stories where he got the best of you in an amusing fashion would be a good idea.

If you've known him since you were kids then stories from back then always go down well.

[IanCormac]

Makes me wonder why you're mates with him to be honest. Sounds like you don't have a lot in common.

Either way if he's a boring git then go down the route of making it a nice speech about what sort of a person he is and what a good father/husband he will be. You don't have to do a standup routine and a speech about what a good guy he is would still work.

[Backtobasics]

Easiest way is to just go on some best man speech web pages and watch some you tube videos, keep it to 5 minutes and you're laughing

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bl7rJdlwKMo as an example

[E31Shrew]

I had the same problem. In the end I selected 10 of the most sickly wedding cards, made sure the senders were present, and got them to stand up while I read the ghastly poem out to all and sundry. Went down a treat and, as all was written down didn't need to try and remember anything.
Gosh...I'm amusing

To add..I did know the majority of the guests

Edited by E31Shrew on Sunday 11th September 16:00

[Ardenconnel]

Start by saying why you're his friend and how much you value his friendship. Would you trust him with your life? If so, say so. Imagine how honoured he would feel about you saying that. Also if you were part of the bride's family, just think how they would then think about him and also you. Doesn't need to be cringey or over the top, just be honest.

If you can do so, then throw in a few stories, funny ones or ones to demonstrate what a top bloke he is. Best Man speeches don't have to be knockabout laugh-a-minute stuff. VERY few people can pull it off.

Also keep it short. Ten minutes is a long time to keep people entertained simply by listening to one person speaking.

Edited by Ardenconnel on Sunday 11th September 15:59

[technodup]

Noodle1982 said:

The issue is that he hasnt really done anything i can think of that would make good anecdotes. He hasn't joined us on any lad's holidays over the years, has been on very few nights out with us and has always chosen the homely life in a relationship rather than playing the field. I'm also a bit restricted with how i deliver the speech i.e cant be offensive or lewd.

I was the opposite. I was supposed to do one recently so I thought about the anecdotes, tales and stories over the years. I could write a book of them. But between the various sex related incidents, the drugs, the ex-wife, the nudity, the burst banjo string, the various children to different mothers, the criminal damage, the theft and more drug stories I literally couldn't think of a single thing I could talk about which would pass the family filter.

So I let someone else say a few words.