Spending on 'Treats' - How do you decide it's "sensible"?
Discussion
Hummed and harred and decided that this was more ‘Lounge’ than ‘Money’ . . .
When is it ‘OK’ not to be ‘sensible’? Blow a little cash (OK, plastic) on treats, meal out for £50, surprise vintage jewellery present for o/h in the hundreds, vintage Speedmaster or Air King watch for a couple of thousand?
We’re solvent and secure but not rich – joint income £70k ish (more than 50% of that my o/h’s salary), 7 year old child we had later than average, £49k mortgage on £250k main residence in cheap end of town, £99k mortgage on £250k buy-to-let in nicer end. Cash poor, mainly due to mortgage over-payments.
Really really want (in the same way a 7 year old does probably) some ‘treats’. How does one decide when it’s sensible not to be sensible?
When is it ‘OK’ not to be ‘sensible’? Blow a little cash (OK, plastic) on treats, meal out for £50, surprise vintage jewellery present for o/h in the hundreds, vintage Speedmaster or Air King watch for a couple of thousand?
We’re solvent and secure but not rich – joint income £70k ish (more than 50% of that my o/h’s salary), 7 year old child we had later than average, £49k mortgage on £250k main residence in cheap end of town, £99k mortgage on £250k buy-to-let in nicer end. Cash poor, mainly due to mortgage over-payments.
Really really want (in the same way a 7 year old does probably) some ‘treats’. How does one decide when it’s sensible not to be sensible?
R8Steve said:
As an aside, why do you rent the house that's in the 'nice' end of town and stay in the one that isn't?
"Nice" end property is a large light south facing two bedroom flat with a garage overlooking the park. We live in a three bedroom + loftroom house with garage so extra space useful. In 16 years or so in the house lost one plant from the front garden and the colour coded valve caps I put on my wife's Impreza (prob on a kid's bike). It's not a sink estate (another half a mile north for that) and many long, long term residents, nice Edwardian houses, but not the middle class nirvana enclave my neurotic chip-on-shoulder working class parents drummed into me as a life goal.
Might very well retire to the flat. To be fair, although it's a far better postcode (separated by about a mile!) there's almost as much drug dealing in that road as mine!
Really lucky by some fluke to have got a place at a really good Middle School that has a decent catchment. Boy starts in September.
Silverbullet767 said:
I don't think we've had quite enough info on your financial life, could you provide an excel spreadsheet with a pie chart or two?
mmmm pie
Well I could, as it's basically what I do for a living (used to do it in war zones so not quite as dull as it sounds). But it's more the psychology of decision making that I'm interested in, especially my own . . . mmmm pie
Everything alright at home? I have to ask because the feeling of having to buy stuff *just because* can indicate underlying issues elsewhere.
'The things that make you happy aren't things', I once read on an internet recently.
I wish I'd read that years ago and saved myself a lot of money.
'The things that make you happy aren't things', I once read on an internet recently.
I wish I'd read that years ago and saved myself a lot of money.
It sounds like guilt. How can you spend money on yourself when you have wife/child/house etc?
Look at it this way. You have needs too, one of which is the need to feel appreciated. If you're not getting that, the temptation is to treat yourself - give yourself a pat on the back, "you deserve it" etc. This is fine, but do think about the root cause some time.
For treats, you can choose to build memories - take a river boat down the Thames (or wherever), day at a theme park, or just give yourself permission to watch the GP all Sunday with your favourite tipple. Or you can get something that reminds you that you've achieved something - the watch/car that you'll see every day (and can sell if you need to). Or just blow it on crap and feel bad after, which is where the guilt comes in.
Look at it this way. You have needs too, one of which is the need to feel appreciated. If you're not getting that, the temptation is to treat yourself - give yourself a pat on the back, "you deserve it" etc. This is fine, but do think about the root cause some time.
For treats, you can choose to build memories - take a river boat down the Thames (or wherever), day at a theme park, or just give yourself permission to watch the GP all Sunday with your favourite tipple. Or you can get something that reminds you that you've achieved something - the watch/car that you'll see every day (and can sell if you need to). Or just blow it on crap and feel bad after, which is where the guilt comes in.
if i can swallow it using my current account after paying for the essentials then its an acceptable treat.
if i have to use a credit card then it's either an unexpected essential (car repair or something), or a holiday/flights.
But that said, i plan my finances 6-9 months in advance, so i know exactly how much/little money i have to play with every month for "treats" or spending money.
if i have to use a credit card then it's either an unexpected essential (car repair or something), or a holiday/flights.
But that said, i plan my finances 6-9 months in advance, so i know exactly how much/little money i have to play with every month for "treats" or spending money.
Octoposse said:
"Nice" end property is a large light south facing two bedroom flat with a garage overlooking the park. We live in a three bedroom + loftroom house with garage so extra space useful.
In 16 years or so in the house lost one plant from the front garden and the colour coded valve caps I put on my wife's Impreza (prob on a kid's bike). It's not a sink estate (another half a mile north for that) and many long, long term residents, nice Edwardian houses, but not the middle class nirvana enclave my neurotic chip-on-shoulder working class parents drummed into me as a life goal.
Might very well retire to the flat. To be fair, although it's a far better postcode (separated by about a mile!) there's almost as much drug dealing in that road as mine!
Really lucky by some fluke to have got a place at a really good Middle School that has a decent catchment. Boy starts in September.
Someone stole one of your plants?!?In 16 years or so in the house lost one plant from the front garden and the colour coded valve caps I put on my wife's Impreza (prob on a kid's bike). It's not a sink estate (another half a mile north for that) and many long, long term residents, nice Edwardian houses, but not the middle class nirvana enclave my neurotic chip-on-shoulder working class parents drummed into me as a life goal.
Might very well retire to the flat. To be fair, although it's a far better postcode (separated by about a mile!) there's almost as much drug dealing in that road as mine!
Really lucky by some fluke to have got a place at a really good Middle School that has a decent catchment. Boy starts in September.
I've seen a lot of articles recently that talk about how we should all be spending more money (proportionally) on doing things and less on buying stuff.
i.e. if you buy that treat, you'll probably want another soon after, but spend the money on days out and the memories will last. I think the former is how the line can get crossed and eating out and buying new clothes simply becomes routine.
i.e. if you buy that treat, you'll probably want another soon after, but spend the money on days out and the memories will last. I think the former is how the line can get crossed and eating out and buying new clothes simply becomes routine.
What do you define as a treat?
I would say that any treat that creates memories / good times (Holiday, weekend away etc...) then go for it ASAP, life's too short and by the time you've paid off those mortgages your kid will have grown up. It's ok to not be sensible with money from time to time if it enriches your life.
I would say that any treat that creates memories / good times (Holiday, weekend away etc...) then go for it ASAP, life's too short and by the time you've paid off those mortgages your kid will have grown up. It's ok to not be sensible with money from time to time if it enriches your life.
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t life now/better life at some point in the future mentality.