Terrible Business Names or Slogans
Terrible Business Names or Slogans
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Discussion

Glassman

Original Poster:

25,009 posts

245 months

Thursday 17th August 2017
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What have you seen that makes you think 'why?'

There's a windscreen firm that used to run with the slogan, "Show us your crack". Funny? Perhaps. But seriously? There's a degree of different horses for different courses, but then you have those who change the spelling, like 'Kawlity Kars'. WTF does that achieve? It's not quirky; it's not clever and it's not even tongue-in-cheek... or am I being harsh?

What business names have you seen to make you question the thinking behind it?

Depthhoar

691 posts

158 months

Thursday 17th August 2017
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Burnham

3,668 posts

289 months

Thursday 17th August 2017
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I proposed these two for my company:

'If its in stock, we've got it'

"We're not happy until you're not happy'

Glassman

Original Poster:

25,009 posts

245 months

Thursday 17th August 2017
quotequote all
Burnham said:
If its in stock, we've got it
\

Were you also involved in the script writing for Police Squad?

hehe

Roofless Toothless

7,579 posts

162 months

Thursday 17th August 2017
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I've always been amused by the painters and decorators firm Patel & co.

" You've tried the Cowboys, now try the Indians."

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/comment/letters/1066942...

WilliamWoollard

2,497 posts

223 months

Thursday 17th August 2017
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Sofa King in Northampton has the tag line "where the prices are sofa king good."

Absolute genius.

ClaphamGT3

12,241 posts

273 months

Thursday 17th August 2017
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A very good friend of mine jacked in his job as an equities trader to follow his passion and set up a mass-participation sports event company, which he has called Total Motion Events....

43034

2,971 posts

198 months

Thursday 17th August 2017
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anonymous-user

84 months

Thursday 17th August 2017
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taken in Nottingham 2010.

Glassman

Original Poster:

25,009 posts

245 months

Thursday 17th August 2017
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43034 said:
clap

So it is real! All those extremists didn't die in vain after all.

TobyLerone

1,133 posts

174 months

Thursday 17th August 2017
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biglaughbiglaughbiglaugh

OldSkoolRS

7,266 posts

209 months

Thursday 17th August 2017
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Glassman said:
but then you have those who change the spelling, like 'Kawlity Kars'. WTF does that achieve? It's not quirky; it's not clever and it's not even tongue-in-cheek... or am I being harsh?
Maybe, but I'm with you: I have an aversion to firms with odd spelling, like using a 'Z' instead of an 'S' at the end, or similar to your 'Kawlity' example...just makes me think they are thick, even though they may not be.

Slightly off tangent, but there used to be an advert for a window company and they did it as if the window fitters were singing it, in a sort of audience participation style...sounded like a team of cowboys so I went elsewhere for a quote.

Frank7

6,619 posts

117 months

Thursday 17th August 2017
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There is a coach firm that I see around London from time to time, Impact Coaches, or Impact Travel, I'd think twice before using them.
There used to be a Chinese restaurant in Mile End Road, the name was Foo Kyew, I imagine that gave northerners a laugh.
More than 20 years ago, there was a women's hairdresser in Deptford, London, called The Blow Job, there are apparently quite a few women's hairdressers called Curl Up and Dye.
The Vietnamese restaurant in Sydney Street, Chelsea draws a lot of laughs, its name is Phat Phuc, but apparently it's pronounced Pat Puck.
There is a divorce lawyers firm in Dallas, TX, Ditcher, Quick and Hyde.
For me, the pièce de résistance is Kuntz Detective Agency, Malvern, PA.
I have a photo somewhere of me, standing by the sign in the mid seventies, hair down to my shoulders, God Bless America T shirt, Emiliano Zapata moustache, flared jeans, I look like a roadie for the Eagles.
Edited to add, the sign on Upton Park, (I think it was), station, may have been Plaistow station, that advertised Maycock's Laundry; Don't Kill Your Wife, Let Maycock's Do It.

Edited by Frank7 on Thursday 17th August 23:44

technodup

7,661 posts

160 months

Friday 18th August 2017
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Anything punny.

A Couple Of Tools on a joiner's van. There must be a million of painters ones etc that I can't think of just now.

Hairdressers are also bad for it.

A Close Shave
A Bit Off The Top
Curl Up And Dye
Hairport
Hair Today...
Scissor Sisters
etc etc

But my favourite(?) was Facelook. A beauty place in West Lothian, complete with Facebook font.

Slogans?
Any variation of no job too small/no job too big or small/big enough to cope, small 'enough to care/all [insert trade here] work considered. Turgid 'that'll do' style bks from numbskulls.

Or cheesy guff like 'serving New York, London, Paris, but mostly Renfrewshire'. Hilarious.



anonymous-user

84 months

Friday 18th August 2017
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kunstmuseum in Germany always makes me laugh when i see it.

lucido grigio

44,044 posts

193 months

Friday 18th August 2017
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Tooth removals.....a house moving company.

HD Adam

5,155 posts

214 months

Friday 18th August 2017
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The Spruce goose said:
kunstmuseum in Germany always makes me laugh when i see it.
Drove past this place in Germany once.

Didn't get my own pic but here's a stock Google image.

I want this to be my porn name - Funky stuffer



Tyre Tread

10,687 posts

246 months

Friday 18th August 2017
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OldSkoolRS said:
Maybe, but I'm with you: I have an aversion to firms with odd spelling, like using a 'Z' instead of an 'S' at the end, or similar to your 'Kawlity' example...just makes me think they are thick, even though they may not be.

Slightly off tangent, but there used to be an advert for a window company and they did it as if the window fitters were singing it, in a sort of audience participation style...sounded like a team of cowboys so I went elsewhere for a quote.
The irony is strong in this post.

Efbe

9,251 posts

196 months

Friday 18th August 2017
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Tyre Tread said:
OldSkoolRS said:
Maybe, but I'm with you: I have an aversion to firms with odd spelling, like using a 'Z' instead of an 'S' at the end, or similar to your 'Kawlity' example...just makes me think they are thick, even though they may not be.

Slightly off tangent, but there used to be an advert for a window company and they did it as if the window fitters were singing it, in a sort of audience participation style...sounded like a team of cowboys so I went elsewhere for a quote.
The irony is strong in this post.
hahahaha

fttm

4,581 posts

165 months

Friday 18th August 2017
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In Bridgwater Somerset there's a dog grooming business called "doggy style" , sums up the town perfectly .