What would PH do?
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Discussion

kiethton

Original Poster:

14,656 posts

210 months

Thursday 5th October 2017
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So typically I've got myself in another predicament....

Very good friend's wedding late next spring, I'm down to be an usher, only I've just realised that an exam date has been moved resulting in me being double booked that day.

Friend - I'm an usher, best mates at Uni, said yes some time ago, location ~1 hour away from home. Time ~10am - late - Surrey

Exam - £500 paid to sit, date moved from normal (hence not checking when booking), one exam day a year, not able to defer, need to do it for career reasons. Time 9am -5pm - Docklands

So what would PH do?

Given the cost and relative importance of the exam I'm currently erring to apologising to my friend over a curry, taking the exam on the day and razzing on the motorbike (surrey way) to get there before the evenings festivities, likely downing my sorrows (again)

PoleDriver

29,599 posts

224 months

Thursday 5th October 2017
quotequote all
The PH thing to do would be hammer frozen sausages into the lawn of the examination venue and send a strongly worded email stating that they would be followed by a frozen exam invigilator unless the exam date was moved!

Shakermaker

11,317 posts

130 months

Thursday 5th October 2017
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Tell him. Now.

As delighted as you are to have been asked to be a part of the day, he will understand if you tell him now - it certainly is not too late for him to arrange another friend to be an usher if need be.

If this exam is important he will understand. Plus you can still be there for speeches and drinking/dancing in the evening and have a shot at the bridesmaids.

A friend of mine didn't turn up to a wedding a few weeks ago and only told the mate the night before, told him not to worry as his wife and daughter would still go, but, they didn't, and this was over a similar situation where he had things to do and he just never got around to it. He wasn't down as an usher, but had it been explained early enough then I know that the couple could have at least offered the space to someone else.

paul789

4,263 posts

134 months

Thursday 5th October 2017
quotequote all
Divest yourself of a minuscule portion of your extensive, global portfolio to fund a new date for the wedding.

kiethton

Original Poster:

14,656 posts

210 months

Thursday 5th October 2017
quotequote all
yeah, he would be told this week - planned on sorting a curry for next, could never leave him in the lurch

I'm thinking if I wind the bike up id' be there and changed by 18:30 latest (unless I can finish the last paper earlier), love the frozen sausage idea but I'm not taking a flight to Virginia to hammer them into the lawn! - doubt the owners of the exam venue would appreciate sausages scattered around their car park/foyer either (no grass).

Edited by kiethton on Thursday 5th October 14:28

clubsport

7,415 posts

288 months

Saturday 7th October 2017
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Having cleared these exams, I know how challenging they are.

I wouldn't get any pre conceived ideas about leaving early during the afternoon session, you don't know exactly what to expect and need to give it your best shot with time to review.

In the weeks preceding the exam you don't need any distractions or anything else on your mind until you are free at 5pm to get your life back.

Good luck!

DanielSan

20,036 posts

197 months

Saturday 7th October 2017
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Usher really isn't an important job in a wedding, it's usually a way of saying you're not quite a good enough mate to be best man, but you're good enough to be able to make you do stuff for me on the day hehe

MrBarry123

6,108 posts

151 months

Saturday 7th October 2017
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As said already, apologise and take the exam but make sure you’re there in the evening.

g3org3y

22,499 posts

221 months

Saturday 7th October 2017
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Echo the above. You'll deserve a drink and a dance after the exam. Your friend will understand. Best of luck. smile

ThunderSpook

3,909 posts

241 months

Saturday 7th October 2017
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You have an exam on a Saturday? Any answer other than yes shows your friend to be cheap so you can skip the wedding without guilt wink