Asking "Where are you from'"
Discussion
My wife's cousin told us of a memo circulating in the company that she works for, saying that asking people of different colour to yourself, "Yes, but where do you REALLY come from?", when they originally answer, "England", is bad practice, and should cease, this gave my wife and I pause for thought.
It's not a question that I'd ever ask of someone with a different skin colour to mine, nor would I ever seek to establish whether someone was a Vietnamese, a Laotian, or a Cambodian, or a Malay or a Chinese, but very often, when having dinner in a restaurant, I and my dining companions will hazard guesses at the nationality of the waiter/waitress, by their accents.
Usually French, Spanish, or Italian are easier to guess, but Polish, Czech, Hungarian, and Slovakian are difficult to discern the differences, likewise Estonian, Latvian, and Lithuanian, and just when you think you've narrowed an accent down to either Bulgarian or Romanian, the speaker throws a spanner in the works by announcing that he/she is Moldovan.
It's not a question that I'd ever ask of someone with a different skin colour to mine, nor would I ever seek to establish whether someone was a Vietnamese, a Laotian, or a Cambodian, or a Malay or a Chinese, but very often, when having dinner in a restaurant, I and my dining companions will hazard guesses at the nationality of the waiter/waitress, by their accents.
Usually French, Spanish, or Italian are easier to guess, but Polish, Czech, Hungarian, and Slovakian are difficult to discern the differences, likewise Estonian, Latvian, and Lithuanian, and just when you think you've narrowed an accent down to either Bulgarian or Romanian, the speaker throws a spanner in the works by announcing that he/she is Moldovan.
Frank7 said:
My wife's cousin told us of a memo circulating in the company that she works for, saying that asking people of different colour to yourself, "Yes, but where do you REALLY come from?", when they originally answer, "England", is bad practice, and should cease
I agree, TBH I wouldn't ask them in the first place if they had a perfectly normal English accent, as clearly they are likely from England, if there was a twang there, I may ask but I'd ask along the lines of "oh you have a faint accent, do you originate from another country?" Or something like that.Frank7 said:
My wife's cousin told us of a memo circulating in the company that she works for, saying that asking people of different colour to yourself, "Yes, but where do you REALLY come from?", when they originally answer, "England", is bad practice, and should cease, this gave my wife and I pause for thought.
It's not a question that I'd ever ask of someone with a different skin colour to mine, nor would I ever seek to establish whether someone was a Vietnamese, a Laotian, or a Cambodian, or a Malay or a Chinese, but very often, when having dinner in a restaurant, I and my dining companions will hazard guesses at the nationality of the waiter/waitress, by their accents.
Usually French, Spanish, or Italian are easier to guess, but Polish, Czech, Hungarian, and Slovakian are difficult to discern the differences, likewise Estonian, Latvian, and Lithuanian, and just when you think you've narrowed an accent down to either Bulgarian or Romanian, the speaker throws a spanner in the works by announcing that he/she is Moldovan.
What's your country of origin Frank?It's not a question that I'd ever ask of someone with a different skin colour to mine, nor would I ever seek to establish whether someone was a Vietnamese, a Laotian, or a Cambodian, or a Malay or a Chinese, but very often, when having dinner in a restaurant, I and my dining companions will hazard guesses at the nationality of the waiter/waitress, by their accents.
Usually French, Spanish, or Italian are easier to guess, but Polish, Czech, Hungarian, and Slovakian are difficult to discern the differences, likewise Estonian, Latvian, and Lithuanian, and just when you think you've narrowed an accent down to either Bulgarian or Romanian, the speaker throws a spanner in the works by announcing that he/she is Moldovan.
To be fair to the OP, my other half gets this quite often. She is Lithuanian and speaks perfectly good English. She does however have an accent and almost always gets the "where are you from ?" question.
Nowadays she says Jamacia .... That usually shuts people up as they look at the 180 tall blonde in front of them
Nowadays she says Jamacia .... That usually shuts people up as they look at the 180 tall blonde in front of them
Isn’t this more of an issue depending on the situation, if it’s a general conversation and you ask where someone’s accent is from then I can’t see the issue, it’s showing an interest in the person you’re talking to. No different to someone asking me if I’ve got a Stoke accent....
If it’s a point blank question from nowhere because someone is a different colour/talks differently then that’s just rude.
If it’s a point blank question from nowhere because someone is a different colour/talks differently then that’s just rude.
I get this question asked a fair bit too- travel quite a few places and it gets asked everywhere.
Being of a slightly tanned complexion it’s almost a weekly occurrence for me.
My accent I’m told is very typically English and on occasion told it’s leaning towards ‘posh’ which is what throws people off.
They will ask where I am from even though they know I live in the UK etc.
What they really want to ask is what is my ethnicity or where my parents or grand parents are from but only a few will do and sometimes I can be a bit of an asshole because I know what they are asking but I won’t give them the answer they want...
Them - ‘where are you from?’
Me- ‘From the the UK’
Them - ‘Ah - but where are you really from?’
Me- ‘I’m really from the uk. I live there.’
Them - ‘oh really - but where are you oridginally from?
Me- ‘I was born and raised there so thats where I’m from.
Them - ‘ahh - so your British but......’
A lot of people can’t seem to reconcile that I’m from the UK as they they think I don’t have the ‘right skin tone’ - most of the time it’s not a lack of comprehension out of malice but I would say just confusion especially from those countries where the population is relatively uniform- most of the time European countries
Ironically when I get this asked in the US my first answer gets accepted straight away and a lot of people have no desire to know that they need to know my ethnicity of my parents or grand parents..
Being of a slightly tanned complexion it’s almost a weekly occurrence for me.
My accent I’m told is very typically English and on occasion told it’s leaning towards ‘posh’ which is what throws people off.
They will ask where I am from even though they know I live in the UK etc.
What they really want to ask is what is my ethnicity or where my parents or grand parents are from but only a few will do and sometimes I can be a bit of an asshole because I know what they are asking but I won’t give them the answer they want...
Them - ‘where are you from?’
Me- ‘From the the UK’
Them - ‘Ah - but where are you really from?’
Me- ‘I’m really from the uk. I live there.’
Them - ‘oh really - but where are you oridginally from?
Me- ‘I was born and raised there so thats where I’m from.
Them - ‘ahh - so your British but......’
A lot of people can’t seem to reconcile that I’m from the UK as they they think I don’t have the ‘right skin tone’ - most of the time it’s not a lack of comprehension out of malice but I would say just confusion especially from those countries where the population is relatively uniform- most of the time European countries
Ironically when I get this asked in the US my first answer gets accepted straight away and a lot of people have no desire to know that they need to know my ethnicity of my parents or grand parents..
In Wales they ask where are you to?
I think the idea somewhere behind that probably had some logic that went with it, I dont know many people of my generation who'd think 'yeah, but you know, where you actually from' when speaking with people who arent typically british white. My older generation family might, I know my Aunt is a closet racist with Indians and Polish especially, but there's only so many battles you can fight.
I think the idea somewhere behind that probably had some logic that went with it, I dont know many people of my generation who'd think 'yeah, but you know, where you actually from' when speaking with people who arent typically british white. My older generation family might, I know my Aunt is a closet racist with Indians and Polish especially, but there's only so many battles you can fight.
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