Stories about your Schoolteachers
Discussion
Following on from the nickname thread and Mr Stevenson being known as Rocketand
a story about a conversation between him and a pupil called Micky Taylor
Micky Lend us a fag sir
Rocket No Taylor i will not
M Why?
R Three reasons
you are underage
You must not smoke on school premises
You owe me three already
So any reminiscences good/bad/funny/sad?
a story about a conversation between him and a pupil called Micky Taylor
Micky Lend us a fag sir
Rocket No Taylor i will not
M Why?
R Three reasons
you are underage
You must not smoke on school premises
You owe me three already
So any reminiscences good/bad/funny/sad?
There were many "characters" among the teaching staff at my school, the one that is most appropriate for PH -
Back in the '70's one of our maths masters had a lovely Aston Martin DBS. Certain "lucky" boys were allowed rides in the car. At the time I was too young (or innocent) to understand why he suddenly left the school.
Back in the '70's one of our maths masters had a lovely Aston Martin DBS. Certain "lucky" boys were allowed rides in the car. At the time I was too young (or innocent) to understand why he suddenly left the school.
Mate walked in one afternoon on the boys' PE master banging the girls' PE master doggy over a table in what they thought was a quiet corner of the chemistry lab. He ran out laughing and, of course, word spread like wildfire. Word spread eventually to teachers and parents and about a week later it somehow ended up on the front page of The Sun 
Scottish secondary school, early 80s. I had a science teacher named Jimmy Burden who would arrange cash & carry boxes of crisps and Mars bars on his desk before a lesson, take money off the kids and then allow you to scoff your way through his class.
H & S highlights included him filling 2l plastic bottles with methane/industrial oxygen mix and detonating them in the classroom in front of seated pupils. The resulting 160dB bang and supersonic shards of plastic would probably get him jailed today. I realise that even in the 80s this probably wasn't on the curriculum.
H & S highlights included him filling 2l plastic bottles with methane/industrial oxygen mix and detonating them in the classroom in front of seated pupils. The resulting 160dB bang and supersonic shards of plastic would probably get him jailed today. I realise that even in the 80s this probably wasn't on the curriculum.
Boys school, secondary, was back in the 70s when the cane was still a thing, or perhaps the slipper, along with the accurately aimed black board cleaner.. ouch.
The deputy head was a particularly strict man who would walk into a room and shout "stand!" To which we did and stay still daring not to do anything at all .One day he walked into a lesson
Shouted stand and talked to us about something or other whilst the teacher of that class stood behind him making "looney, knob head gestures and pulling faces.... that was hard work.
I recall that around the time the fall,and rise of Reginald Perrin. Was on TV and one my teachers was a mr Clifford-jones..... "morning CJ" as I walked into a class... "shut up,and sit down boy, you can't afford to waste your time" was the retort.
a maths teacher who was good but usually smelt of booze, carried a short cane which had a name (cant remember it) and some very sad scar marks on both wrists....
The deputy head was a particularly strict man who would walk into a room and shout "stand!" To which we did and stay still daring not to do anything at all .One day he walked into a lesson
Shouted stand and talked to us about something or other whilst the teacher of that class stood behind him making "looney, knob head gestures and pulling faces.... that was hard work.
I recall that around the time the fall,and rise of Reginald Perrin. Was on TV and one my teachers was a mr Clifford-jones..... "morning CJ" as I walked into a class... "shut up,and sit down boy, you can't afford to waste your time" was the retort.
a maths teacher who was good but usually smelt of booze, carried a short cane which had a name (cant remember it) and some very sad scar marks on both wrists....
A certain Mr Benson. History/PSE (personal & social education) teacher and form tutor. At the start of our year with him as our form tutor and our first PSE lesson. "They have removed hitler and nazi germany from the curriculum, any objections if we use these PSE classes to cover this?" Nearly a year of the best history lessons we ever had, teacher hugely passionate and knowledgeable on the subject matter. Great teacher who was strict enough to command complete obedience in the class coupled with a wicked sense of humour. Was gutted when he got the sack for kerb crawling.
All these stories will be true, because ofcourse school children don't play chinese whispers or exaderate at all 
Anyway....
Spanish teacher was always unable to control the class, not one bit, rumour had it he was scared of frogs.
Boy one day sets up a frog in his briefcase and he opens it and runs out crying.
Anyway....
Spanish teacher was always unable to control the class, not one bit, rumour had it he was scared of frogs.
Boy one day sets up a frog in his briefcase and he opens it and runs out crying.
Two from middle school -
Mr.Wright the headmaster, ex-RAF, always immaculately dressed, looked just like Stuart Granger and drove a kingfisher blue RR Silver Shadow (most of his staff had to make do with Datsuns, Fiats and BL porridge. Never gave any of us a ride in it and loved corporal punishment.
'Doc' Martin, looked like an overweight David Niven, always wore a 'Toad of Toadhall' style tweed suit, had a thing for small boys who he liked to 'examine' when he thought no-one was looking.
From comprehensive school - 'Wobbly' Farnden the tech drawing teacher, lovely old boy but we couldn't resist taking the proverbial out of his comedy limp and shaky hands, it was only when we heard he'd been a tail gunner in Lancasters and was badly injured during a crash landing that we wound our necks in. He had a fling with our English teacher who dressed like Margo from 'The Good Life' and wore big Liz Taylor shades indoors. Traded her Fiat 124 in for a yellow TR7 to match her clobber!
Mr.Wright the headmaster, ex-RAF, always immaculately dressed, looked just like Stuart Granger and drove a kingfisher blue RR Silver Shadow (most of his staff had to make do with Datsuns, Fiats and BL porridge. Never gave any of us a ride in it and loved corporal punishment.
'Doc' Martin, looked like an overweight David Niven, always wore a 'Toad of Toadhall' style tweed suit, had a thing for small boys who he liked to 'examine' when he thought no-one was looking.
From comprehensive school - 'Wobbly' Farnden the tech drawing teacher, lovely old boy but we couldn't resist taking the proverbial out of his comedy limp and shaky hands, it was only when we heard he'd been a tail gunner in Lancasters and was badly injured during a crash landing that we wound our necks in. He had a fling with our English teacher who dressed like Margo from 'The Good Life' and wore big Liz Taylor shades indoors. Traded her Fiat 124 in for a yellow TR7 to match her clobber!
We had one called Dr Forbes, known as "Tacklebag", due to an alleged incident where he was caught shagging a tacklebag.
Spock - Mr Lloyd, uncanny resemblance to Leonard Nimoy, head of Lower School and a go to man for various pastoral and practical issues, other teachers used to say "Go and See Spo..., er, Mr Lloyd about that"
Mr Riley, lovely bloke, maths teacher, had a sort of Terry Scott (Terry and June) vibe, looked a bit simple but sharp as anything, big Leicester city fan and terminally easily distracted onto football matters.
Mrs "Frau" Stapleton, languages teacher, one of those women with hair past her arse as someone must have said it was fantastic back in 1973 but now just looked weird, had obviously worn high heels since the age of 2 without a break and had massively deformed calf muscles.
"Yoffi", cant remember his actual name, but looked like the bloke out of a kids program called Fingerbobs about a paper mouse puppet, very affable, until I got caught doodling in his lesson and he went mental.
Mr Pike, PE teacher, claimed to have been in Joy Division at some early point, cant find anything about that so was probably b
ks.
Mr Piekos, dead ringer for Basil Fawlty, lovely bloke, he came and got our old broken telly from our house as the basis for a lesson, went to get it from the car during the lesson, came in and whilst lowering it down ripped the most massive, high pitched fart in front of the class, he was a good sport and just joined in the laughter.
Mr Furnace, Art, fiercely bad breath.
Mr Dowling, a rather came Art Teacher, very funny and known as "Puff the Magic Paintbrush", a name he was quite happy with, said it was apt and uncharacteristically imaginative compared to what he has had in the past.
Spock - Mr Lloyd, uncanny resemblance to Leonard Nimoy, head of Lower School and a go to man for various pastoral and practical issues, other teachers used to say "Go and See Spo..., er, Mr Lloyd about that"
Mr Riley, lovely bloke, maths teacher, had a sort of Terry Scott (Terry and June) vibe, looked a bit simple but sharp as anything, big Leicester city fan and terminally easily distracted onto football matters.
Mrs "Frau" Stapleton, languages teacher, one of those women with hair past her arse as someone must have said it was fantastic back in 1973 but now just looked weird, had obviously worn high heels since the age of 2 without a break and had massively deformed calf muscles.
"Yoffi", cant remember his actual name, but looked like the bloke out of a kids program called Fingerbobs about a paper mouse puppet, very affable, until I got caught doodling in his lesson and he went mental.
Mr Pike, PE teacher, claimed to have been in Joy Division at some early point, cant find anything about that so was probably b
ks.Mr Piekos, dead ringer for Basil Fawlty, lovely bloke, he came and got our old broken telly from our house as the basis for a lesson, went to get it from the car during the lesson, came in and whilst lowering it down ripped the most massive, high pitched fart in front of the class, he was a good sport and just joined in the laughter.
Mr Furnace, Art, fiercely bad breath.
Mr Dowling, a rather came Art Teacher, very funny and known as "Puff the Magic Paintbrush", a name he was quite happy with, said it was apt and uncharacteristically imaginative compared to what he has had in the past.
I slept with Miss Gaughen and we never spoke of it again. I was 16 and just finished exams.
The French Teacher was bullied racially. I felt terrible for her
Mr Booth had a breakdown and got suspended for slamming a kids head into a locker.
This was a private fee paid school in the nineties.
It was actually crazier than the public school which got demolished eventually.
My old man came into some money and thought it would better to send me to a private school. It was bloody Wierd and I ended up leaving after GCSEs.
In the public school I went to prior to the one above. After football we were all getting changed and Reuban Norris walked in and literally took a huge st in front of us all. I was around 14 at the time. I think he was having issues at home or something.
I remember Mr Brown the games teacher freaking the fuk out. Hilarious
The French Teacher was bullied racially. I felt terrible for her
Mr Booth had a breakdown and got suspended for slamming a kids head into a locker.
This was a private fee paid school in the nineties.
It was actually crazier than the public school which got demolished eventually.
My old man came into some money and thought it would better to send me to a private school. It was bloody Wierd and I ended up leaving after GCSEs.
In the public school I went to prior to the one above. After football we were all getting changed and Reuban Norris walked in and literally took a huge s
t in front of us all. I was around 14 at the time. I think he was having issues at home or something. I remember Mr Brown the games teacher freaking the fuk out. Hilarious
Edited by HannsG on Saturday 6th January 16:13
Grammar school, circa 1980 we were covering WW2 in history.
Teacher, Montgomery was his name, asked us to interrogate our grandparents and bring in any WW2 memorabilia they may have.
Cue the class rocking up looking like a Hitler Youth brigade. Uniforms, medals, soldiers helmets etc.
Anyway, next up was geography hosted by Mr Vago, he came in and upon seeing the Nazi regalia, promptly went utterly, completely and irreversibly totally bonkersly berserk.
Turns out Mr Vagos family were the victims of a Nazi atrocity somewhere in Hungary during the war.
Never saw him again.
Teacher, Montgomery was his name, asked us to interrogate our grandparents and bring in any WW2 memorabilia they may have.
Cue the class rocking up looking like a Hitler Youth brigade. Uniforms, medals, soldiers helmets etc.
Anyway, next up was geography hosted by Mr Vago, he came in and upon seeing the Nazi regalia, promptly went utterly, completely and irreversibly totally bonkersly berserk.
Turns out Mr Vagos family were the victims of a Nazi atrocity somewhere in Hungary during the war.
Never saw him again.
sc0tt said:
Terry Lowther
Got banged up for bum raping little boys.
Yep we had one of those, can't remember his name but he was a PE teacher.Got banged up for bum raping little boys.
The husband of one of my teachers; he was a teacher at the same school, ran off with a sixth former, my sister was also good friends with the daughter of the teachers.
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