Seeing Granparents

[Macski]

How often do you see your grand parents?

How often do your teen children see them?

[Bibbs]

My grandparents are dead, I don't have kids.

[klootzak]

My grandparents are long gone. I see my (baby) grandson every week. I don't expect this to last.

By the time he's a teenager, I doubt whether I'll see him more than once or twice a year. Exactly as it should be. He will be focusing on his life.

k

[Spitfire2]

Interesting how attitudes are different around the world. My wife is Spanish and there is a huge difference to the "twice a year" idea of the poster above.

Huge focus on families in Spain. The teenagers regularly hang out with both grand parents and great grand parents and enjoy doing so despite getting on with their own lives.

Frankly - I think it's them who have got it right.

I'm always impressed by how well mannered and family oriented kids are there compared to many of the grunting, socially inept teenagers I encounter in Scotland.

[Gary29]

Mine are all dead unfortunately.

But I make sure my daughter sees hers (3 remaining) at the very least once a month, and she sees my parents every week as they're only 5 mins away, I hope that will continue as she gets older.

[WestyCarl]

Maybe once a month and usually holiday with both sets each year.

[sc0tt]

No grandparents here but when my dads mum and dad were alive I think I only saw them a few times in 30 years.

[Japveesix]

One lot of mine are long dead and the others I see a lot less than if like as they certainly won't be around much longer.

I've got a 9 week old and both his grandparents are within about a 25 min drive and we're going to try hard to make sure he sees them really regularly. It's a really special relationship and I feel it's important and he'll benefit long-term from knowing them well and spending time with them. It's just nice, and he might have a few teenage years where he doesn't see them much but that relationship underneath will still be there and I can guarantee he'll want to see more of them when it begins to look like they're on their way out in 25/30 years.

[hutchst]

My last grandparent died 50 years ago next year. There were only 2 still alive when I was born. The joys of being born into the tenement slums in the west of Scotland in the fifties I suppose.

[borcy]

No grandparents left, my little ones see them 5-10 a year. Difficult to do more as we all live several hours drive apart.

[Antony Moxey]

My kids (both in their 20s) see their surviving grandparents at least once a week, whether that’s them coming here or the kids visiting them. I know we’re all different but it would seem odd to me not to see them, although having said that I didn’t see mine quite so regularly, but I’d imagine - the last one left us at least 25 years ago - it was monthly at worst.

[snotrag]

Only one of mine left - saw them all regularly as kids and definitely making a conscious effort to see the last remianing one more often. I was the eldest grandson on both sides, the 'first' and feel a bit of a duty.

Also, my young boy is also now 'the first' again for all HIS grandparents - who thank fully he sees an awful lot, and all of them absolutely dote on him, he is very lucky - I would like this to continue.

It also saves me a lot on nursery fees

[DanL]

Surely it depends where everyone lives? If you’re in the same town, I’d assume there’s a visit on a Sunday afternoon at least once a month (certainly was when I was growing up!).

If they’re in another country, as is the case with one set of my niece and nephew’s grandparents, they may only see them a few times a year versus once a week for the ones in the same town.

[Zoon]

klootzak said:

By the time he's a teenager, I doubt whether I'll see him more than once or twice a year. Exactly as it should be.

k

Once or twice a year? Blimey
Not a close family?

[borcy]

DanL said:

Surely it depends where everyone lives? If you’re in the same town, I’d assume there’s a visit on a Sunday afternoon at least once a month (certainly was when I was growing up!).

If they’re in another country, as is the case with one set of my niece and nephew’s grandparents, they may only see them a few times a year versus once a week for the ones in the same town.

Exactly, how much you see them is hugely dependent on circumstances.

[Shakermaker]

My dad's dad died 11 years before I was born so I never met him.

My dad's mum, used to see her 1-2 times a year, she lived down in Dorset and couldn't drive but we went to visit a few times, sadly she died when I was 6.

My mum's parents, we used to see them 2-3 times a year at their house and they'd come to stay with us similarly, they lived 300 miles away but we spent a lot of time with them during school holidays and so forth, my grandad died when I was 24 and my gran died 18 months ago when I was 33, but I still saw her frequently until then.

My daughter, she's only 2, but she sees her grandma (wife's mum) and my parents at least once a week, we all live much closer together. Hopefully that will continue as she grows up.

[geeks]

My mums mum (my Nan) used to child mind us when we were at school so saw here and my step grandfather almost everyday growing up, my mums dad (who refused to be called grandad as he considered himself too young, my mum was a teen mum) I used to see more or less once a month and my dads mum (my grandma) a few times a year, we only ever say my dads dad my grandad once a year.

These days I see my Nan every couple of months, my mums dad every couple of months and my grandma a couple of times a year, his dad is unfortunately no longer with us having died a couple of years ago at the superb age of 95! My great grandparents are sadly all gone but I did at least know them until my teens/early twenties and have many fond memories from the Norfolk Broads!

I should make more of an effort, they will be gone before I know it and there is still a lot I don't know about them. I will call them all this evening and arrange dinner, good thread OP has reminded me to check in with them.

[klootzak]

Zoon said:

Once or twice a year? Blimey
Not a close family?

Perhaps not.

We’re close with our daughter, but I really wouldn’t expect a teenager to be close with his (their?) grandparents.

I’d love it if we were, but realistically he will have much more important things to be thinking about than a couple of elderly relatives.

K

[irocfan]

should have seen mine more - regret it.

[rxtx]

I have no grandparents left. Most of them died when I was either very or quite young, except my maternal grandfather, who, after his wife died, downsized and moved to be closer to his two daughters - my mum and my aunt of course.

Then I saw him, his dog, and cat, every day until he died, and I'm glad for that.