Am I being reasonable with child care offer ?
Discussion
A very long story so I'll thank anyone in advance for reading, appreciate any feedback and try and summarise as succinctly as I can.
Wife and i separated last December. I lost my job in May due to Covid. Just got new job half previous salary (nmw) which is full time mon to fri but earlies middles and lates on a 6 week pattern. 2 x early 6am till 2pm, 2 x middle 9 till 5.30 and 2 x 2pm till 9.30pm.
I'm suggesting I pick our son up from nursery at 3pm hand him over 7pm when on earlies.
Have almost complete care of him when on middles by dropping him at nursery and picking him up with him staying at mine.
Have her drop son to me when on lates at 8am and me put him in nursery at 1pm with her picking him up and him staying with her.
Pretty dry one this chaps but would really like an impartial opinion...
Wife and i separated last December. I lost my job in May due to Covid. Just got new job half previous salary (nmw) which is full time mon to fri but earlies middles and lates on a 6 week pattern. 2 x early 6am till 2pm, 2 x middle 9 till 5.30 and 2 x 2pm till 9.30pm.
I'm suggesting I pick our son up from nursery at 3pm hand him over 7pm when on earlies.
Have almost complete care of him when on middles by dropping him at nursery and picking him up with him staying at mine.
Have her drop son to me when on lates at 8am and me put him in nursery at 1pm with her picking him up and him staying with her.
Pretty dry one this chaps but would really like an impartial opinion...
So he'll stay at yours for 2 weeks out of every 6 and the rest of the time she'll either collect early from nursery (2 weeks) or late from you (2 weeks). If she's working, will the early pick-up fit with her hours?
That sounds doable. It gets messy when they start school and you have to cover the holidays of course, but I'm assuming that's a way off.
I think that financially it may affect you if you aren't having him overnight 50% of the time.
That sounds doable. It gets messy when they start school and you have to cover the holidays of course, but I'm assuming that's a way off.
I think that financially it may affect you if you aren't having him overnight 50% of the time.
Thanks Bluesgirl.
When I'm on earlies shed have him overnight. I'd pick him up from nursery at 3pm, give him his tea and take him to her for 7pm.
When I'm on lates shed bring him to me at 8am, I'd take him to nursery for 1pm and shed pick him up at say 4.30pm.
Ex is self employed and has total flexibility in her hours if she requires.
From her point of view it's not "fair" as like you have pointed out he would be staying with her overnight 4 weeks to my 2.
Can a court award financially against me when she now earns £12k a year more than me and I already am unable to meet all the costs of running house on my own with half the nursery fees ?
When I'm on earlies shed have him overnight. I'd pick him up from nursery at 3pm, give him his tea and take him to her for 7pm.
When I'm on lates shed bring him to me at 8am, I'd take him to nursery for 1pm and shed pick him up at say 4.30pm.
Ex is self employed and has total flexibility in her hours if she requires.
From her point of view it's not "fair" as like you have pointed out he would be staying with her overnight 4 weeks to my 2.
Can a court award financially against me when she now earns £12k a year more than me and I already am unable to meet all the costs of running house on my own with half the nursery fees ?
I don't know what approach the court would take, I'm afraid.
Www.wikivorce.com is a useful site for information and advice though. Hopefully a trawl through there will help you get a clearer picture of where you stand and what's possible.
Good luck.
Www.wikivorce.com is a useful site for information and advice though. Hopefully a trawl through there will help you get a clearer picture of where you stand and what's possible.
Good luck.
Whatever you do, do not call it a "childcare offer" to your ex. Mention it as fitting in co-parenting around your work hours so you can keep your job and still be able to provide
She will got nuts at the terms both childcare or babysitting. Gets them all hot around the collar. I'm a man of experience...
She will got nuts at the terms both childcare or babysitting. Gets them all hot around the collar. I'm a man of experience...
If she wants to bring a financial claim against you for child support it will be via the CMS - you can find their calculator online and put the figures in based on your respective incomes and childcare split (overnight stays) and see for yourself what they would award. I wouldn’t start worrying yourself about a family court raiding a NMW income - if you get that far the maintenance would be the least of your financial problems!
This will all depend on her and how she feels, as you wont be having the child for 50% of the time, you will be eligible to pay maintenance, now you have a couple of options, you can either set up a private arrangement with the ex, ask the CMS to calculate how much you have to pay, or ask the CMS to deal with everything.
If you choose the last option, then the CMS will add a percentage on top of what you pay, and then take a percentage of what the ex receives.
Ultimately though, if she wants to claim maintenance because she has custody more than you do, then you will have no choice but to pay.
If you choose the last option, then the CMS will add a percentage on top of what you pay, and then take a percentage of what the ex receives.
Ultimately though, if she wants to claim maintenance because she has custody more than you do, then you will have no choice but to pay.
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