Massive Childhood Trouble
Discussion
What was the biggest telling off you got as a child, and why?
Mine was when I threw one of those rubber-ball-tipped xylophone beater thingies across the classroom and smashed a huge glass-fronted clock that was on the wall above the teacher's desk. This was at Primary school. An epic b
king. 
Mine was when I threw one of those rubber-ball-tipped xylophone beater thingies across the classroom and smashed a huge glass-fronted clock that was on the wall above the teacher's desk. This was at Primary school. An epic b
king. 
There was a display of free fall parachuting going on using my primary school playing fields ( remember those ) as a DZ. I ran under the ropes to try and give one of the lads a hug ( I was about 6 years old ) it didn’t go down well, except for the lad who had just landed, he thought it was hilarious. I got a severe b
king for that one 
king for that one 
So many I'm hoping my kids don't take after me.
Daft things like showing my mates my new ability to swear like a sailer, about 8 or 9 years old, outside my back yard (high wall and gate) unknown to me was my mother was at the other side of the gate. Gate opened and my feet didn't touch the ground.
Setting fires outside the school which I was then accused of trying to burn down the school. I wasn't stupid and knew brick walls don't burn. Matey that was with me and did most of it got away scot free and I was blamed for most of it.
Came home stoned as a teenager and put some frozen burgers in the grill and turned it to high to cook them quicker as you do as a kid. Went to the toilet and forgot about them, they set fire and melted the grill.
Even doing something simple like microwaving some conkers to make them harder ended up stinking the house out for weeks.
My parents were both quite strict but I was still a little t
t.
Daft things like showing my mates my new ability to swear like a sailer, about 8 or 9 years old, outside my back yard (high wall and gate) unknown to me was my mother was at the other side of the gate. Gate opened and my feet didn't touch the ground.
Setting fires outside the school which I was then accused of trying to burn down the school. I wasn't stupid and knew brick walls don't burn. Matey that was with me and did most of it got away scot free and I was blamed for most of it.
Came home stoned as a teenager and put some frozen burgers in the grill and turned it to high to cook them quicker as you do as a kid. Went to the toilet and forgot about them, they set fire and melted the grill.
Even doing something simple like microwaving some conkers to make them harder ended up stinking the house out for weeks.
My parents were both quite strict but I was still a little t
t.When I was young, primary age I exploded my dads jewellery vice. Thought it would be a good idea to use a 2ft bar for leverage on this small vice and it literally exploded, that didn’t go down well…
when I was a bit older I found the joy of pissing around with shotgun cartridges. Set one off in the garage deliberately. Wasnt a complete moron, I had emptied the pellets out and wadded the powder in place. Quite a good bang if I do say so myself, unfortunately my parents disagreed. They were even less happy upon finding my home made slam fire shotgun.
So many stories of me doing dumb stuff, settings stuff on fire, blowing stuff up etc fortunately I got away with most of it.
Secondary school age brought about lots more b
kings for the normal sort of knobbery. Also found out I liked fighting so was regularly in deep doo doo for that. One time I went too far and received an almighty b
king from the school, the police and parents for giving someone a proper going over, he lost some teeth and sustained other injuries. It was well and truly hammered home that if I did that as an adult I would be spending time behind bars. He deserved it but that excuse didn’t wash, unsurprisingly. More stories than I care to remember. I was, and probably still am, a complete sod.
when I was a bit older I found the joy of pissing around with shotgun cartridges. Set one off in the garage deliberately. Wasnt a complete moron, I had emptied the pellets out and wadded the powder in place. Quite a good bang if I do say so myself, unfortunately my parents disagreed. They were even less happy upon finding my home made slam fire shotgun.
So many stories of me doing dumb stuff, settings stuff on fire, blowing stuff up etc fortunately I got away with most of it.
Secondary school age brought about lots more b
kings for the normal sort of knobbery. Also found out I liked fighting so was regularly in deep doo doo for that. One time I went too far and received an almighty b
king from the school, the police and parents for giving someone a proper going over, he lost some teeth and sustained other injuries. It was well and truly hammered home that if I did that as an adult I would be spending time behind bars. He deserved it but that excuse didn’t wash, unsurprisingly. More stories than I care to remember. I was, and probably still am, a complete sod. When I was in secondary school, we all had to write letters to the headmaster for some reason. Some sort of English exercise. A girl who was particularly horrible to me for no reason left her letter open on a computer screen one day. I think she had forgotten to log out of the machine.
Anyhow, I edited the letter to include statements relating to taking the headmaster's trousers down and having a go on his old man. When I had finished editing, I printed the letter off, popped it in the relevant out tray, saved her document and logged her off the system.
The letter made it's way to the headmaster who upon reading it, called the whole school in for an emergency assembly. He wanted to know who had done it.
I was eventually caught out because one of my friends fancied the girl and he grassed me up. He thought it would help him get into her knickers.
I was taken to the headmaster's office and given a severe telling off. I was threatened with exclusion. I don't know how I wasn't excluded.
Anyhow, the next few weeks weren't the best because I also managed to smash a school greenhouse glass pane with a snowball.
I didn't enjoy school and I have no idea how I managed to get through it without being expelled.
Anyhow, I edited the letter to include statements relating to taking the headmaster's trousers down and having a go on his old man. When I had finished editing, I printed the letter off, popped it in the relevant out tray, saved her document and logged her off the system.
The letter made it's way to the headmaster who upon reading it, called the whole school in for an emergency assembly. He wanted to know who had done it.
I was eventually caught out because one of my friends fancied the girl and he grassed me up. He thought it would help him get into her knickers.
I was taken to the headmaster's office and given a severe telling off. I was threatened with exclusion. I don't know how I wasn't excluded.
Anyhow, the next few weeks weren't the best because I also managed to smash a school greenhouse glass pane with a snowball.
I didn't enjoy school and I have no idea how I managed to get through it without being expelled.
1969. With my parents at a party and my brother asleep in bed I took my mum's Frogeye for a drive. I was fifteen. My mate Tim came with me. He looked much older than me. His job was to buy a gallon of fuel in a can so the fuel gauge wouldn't be low and baby-faced me wouldn't be spotted filling up in a petrol station. It all went swimmingly until we were nearly home and stopped near the house for Tim to walk down to see if the coast was clear. It wasn't. My brother was downstairs. Worse. My folks in dad's car, their evening ruined, pulled up behind the Sprite. It was the only time I ever remember dad hitting me. He hit me very hard on the side of my head. I saw it coming. I watched it crank up but knew better than to duck. Oh, boy, was I in trouble. Dad had taught us the rudiments of driving round the peri track of a nearby airfield when we were tall enough to reach the pedals. He may have regretted it a bit now.
Tim and I met up last year for the first time in twenty five years. After the pleasantries the next thing he said was, "Your brother grassed us up."
Tim and I met up last year for the first time in twenty five years. After the pleasantries the next thing he said was, "Your brother grassed us up."
I was having a mud fight with my sister throwing lumps of soil at each other when I was around 6 so she was around 3. I picked the biggest one I could find out and threw that.... Turned out to have half a brick in it. I cracked my sister's head open which meant a trip to hospital and the worst telling off I can remember!
Probably the worst one by far was when i got suspended from school for pinning a kids hand to the desk. We were playing that stupid game with a compass where you stab inbetween your fingers over someone else hand and this kid deliberately put the point of his compass through my the skin on the side of my finger - scar is still there 40 odd years later - so i waited for revenge and when the time came.....voila!
Mum was mad at me for that one but when dad got home after being away all week, he was incandescent with rage
Mum was mad at me for that one but when dad got home after being away all week, he was incandescent with rage

Edited by anonymous-user on Saturday 3rd July 17:30
Edited by anonymous-user on Saturday 3rd July 17:30
I don't think I got caught for anything including
Theft and wrecking a dump truck
Setting off a number of propane gas cylinders and fire brigade turning up
Setting fire in 1976 to some waste land them getting thanked by the local plod when we helped him out it out.
Pissing in a deal at school
Theft and wrecking a dump truck
Setting off a number of propane gas cylinders and fire brigade turning up
Setting fire in 1976 to some waste land them getting thanked by the local plod when we helped him out it out.
Pissing in a deal at school
Ussrcossack said:
I don't think I got caught for anything including
Theft and wrecking a dump truck
Setting off a number of propane gas cylinders and fire brigade turning up
Setting fire in 1976 to some waste land them getting thanked by the local plod when we helped him out it out.
Pissing in a deal at school
Theft and wrecking a dump truck
Setting off a number of propane gas cylinders and fire brigade turning up
Setting fire in 1976 to some waste land them getting thanked by the local plod when we helped him out it out.
Pissing in a deal at school
Dearie me.
Sounds like serious criminality rather than high jinx.
Did your pyromania, anti-social delinquency and lack of
respect for other people's property continue into adulthood ?
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