Little garden bonfire
Little garden bonfire
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anonymous-user

Original Poster:

83 months

Monday 1st November 2021
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4 and a half year old son wanted to do a bonfire in the garden, so we're going to do one in the portable barbecue (maybe 20 inches round?). He's been collecting little twigs to dry and helped cut some pallet wood into pieces to burn, but I'm not sure how involved to get him on the day. I'd love him to help me build and light it, but is that going to give him a thirst for flames when he gets older? We otherwise have no fire in the house (no wood burner or gas cooking) and it's only once a year, he's a stable 4yo boy and his overwhelming memory will likely be toasted marshmallows so just want to know if I'm overthinking this!

defblade

8,051 posts

242 months

Monday 1st November 2021
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You're over thinking it.

Scouting is the natural home of pyromaniacs, we're taking budding ones into "Squirrels" at 4 years old now...

The first Explorer group I led was called "Incendium" as the Latin root was considered acceptable - the Greek was felt to be a little too obvious wink

fat80b

3,230 posts

250 months

Monday 1st November 2021
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Let him do the whole thing. He’ll get bored otherwise.

We use a fire log at the base of it as it lights pretty quickly and a blow torch to get it going.

Then spend as much time as you can fetching sticks to keep it fed.
Our kids have lit fires, bbqs, (and occasionally fireworks) since they were three. And by involving them you get to instil the safety aspects without the fear.

Compare this with the cousins that are petrified of everything which in turn makes it more dangerous…..

Bungleaio

6,587 posts

231 months

Monday 1st November 2021
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Evoluzione

10,345 posts

272 months

Monday 1st November 2021
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Yes it will cause untold mental damage, keep him inside and away from normal life until he's at least 30.


Super Sonic

14,226 posts

83 months

Monday 1st November 2021
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Does your shed need demolishing?

mcelliott

10,487 posts

210 months

Monday 1st November 2021
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Whatever made you think you were overthinking it rofl:

Leptons

5,493 posts

205 months

Monday 1st November 2021
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It sounds like a fun and enjoyable father and son activity. Yes you are overthinking it.

anonymous-user

Original Poster:

83 months

Monday 1st November 2021
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mcelliott said:
Whatever made you think you were overthinking it
My wife. smile

Attitudes to fire and fireworks have changed a lot since I was a kid, half the street used to have bonfires and fireworks in the 80s, now it's pretty much unheard of.

Evoluzione

10,345 posts

272 months

Tuesday 2nd November 2021
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It's more the physical damage I would be bothered about. Teach him about fire, the dangers and keep him safe.

hotchy

4,828 posts

155 months

Tuesday 2nd November 2021
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I had a big one in the garden that included petrol and all those anti safety things you get warned about when I was around 5/6. Good news i never got a taste for flames... in otherwords, yes your over thinking it. Your kid probably plays GTA at his friends house killing ho's and burning people with flamethrowers. I wouldnt worry. I also played that and turned out fine. It was 2D in my day though...

OK that one will be in another 2-3 years haha.

cml24

1,583 posts

176 months

Tuesday 2nd November 2021
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My daughter has lit charcoal bbqs from 3 years old (with supervision).

She has learnt what to touch and what not to in a fairly controlled environment.

It's no different to many things that are a bit dangerous but best to teach ina safe controlled environment.

DrDeAtH

3,699 posts

261 months

Tuesday 2nd November 2021
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Super Sonic said:
Does your shed need demolishing?
Deserves recognition....... I remember the thread well...

anonymous-user

Original Poster:

83 months

Tuesday 2nd November 2021
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In my experience if you make fire a taboo thing then they are far more likely to want to play with it as they get older. The more normalised things like that become, the quicker they will get bored of it

Randy Winkman

22,381 posts

218 months

Tuesday 2nd November 2021
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I think the OP should just be very careful but definitely do it.

When I was 8 my mum asked me what I wanted for my birthday and I said "A bonfire".

One of the best things I've done in my life was the final day of a National Trust working holiday on Exmoor when the team leader allowed me to be in charge of the bonfire in his place. Other people cut stuff down and brought it to me and I spent the whole day chucking brambles, bracken and saplings onto the fire. Marvellous.

Eric Mc

125,609 posts

294 months

Tuesday 2nd November 2021
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Get some consultants in. These guys seem to know how to organise a bonfire -


Jasandjules

72,584 posts

258 months

Tuesday 2nd November 2021
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Sure why not teach him fire safety.

anonymous-user

Original Poster:

83 months

Tuesday 2nd November 2021
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Evoluzione said:
It's more the physical damage I would be bothered about. Teach him about fire, the dangers and keep him safe.
That's a good perspective, I'll go with that. We'll have to build it in the morning when it's light, but getting him to feed a small fire with bits of wood is a good idea as it'll keep him interested, rather than what I would want to do for myself which is pile up all the wood we've got and set fire to it in one go. smile

MrHappy

521 posts

111 months

Tuesday 2nd November 2021
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Bungleaio said:


That’s brilliant! I had to look it up, the red fuel can is perfection.

J4CKO

46,821 posts

229 months

Tuesday 2nd November 2021
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Get him lighting it, let him get a bit too close but not actually too close.

We tended to spend a lot of time burning stuff as kids, we had a field to burn stuff in, dens with a fire in like Stig of the Dump, cooking beefburgers on a sort of platter thing which tunred out of be my mates mums best one so she wastn impressved when it came back a bit kind of burnt with obvious evidence where we had scoured it with brillo pads and tried to straighten it out biggrin

My dad trained us well with fire, basically if he was doing it then it probably wasn't a good idea, remember him trying to light a pile of leaves that even as an eight year old were too damp, he tried various accelerants and found that paint thinners gave a good chance of achieving combustion but leaving the empty (ish) 5 litre can on the grass wasnt a good idea as it fell over, the fumes ignited and it propelled itself at rocket like velocity across the garden narrowly missing us, most impressive as it left a fire trail like the De Lorean in back to the future and collapsed in on itself and looked like a crushed Coke can.

The other one was firing bangers from a tent pole.

I rarely had eyebrows between the ages of 12 and 15 biggrin

It wont turn him into a pyromaniac, I think it does them good by an large, makes me wonder how many people grow up and have no feel for stuff like that, perhaps why some folk are happy carrying unleaded round in carrier bags, having not seen what it does to toy cars in much smaller quantities as a kid, then you see someone chuck it on a bonfire, errr no, obviously never been chased by burning petrol vapour.