Managing Expectation, and the General Public
Discussion
Does your tolerance gradually wear thin with age, or does the general public grind it out of you?
For me, yes, managing expectation has become more and more difficult in recent years (43 + VAT now) but then I have always struggled with it. Dealing with the general public (in everyday life) is making me buy more Lucky Dips so I can win the jackpot, buy myself an island and get away from ignorant and stupid people.
People sometimes think you have a short fuse, or are in permanent Victor Meldrew mode, but when you are subjected to little episodes/incidents/scenarios all day almost every day, they tend to build up. The lowest common denominator prevails. As much as I try to take a deep breath (which works sometimes) and ignore, it's not that easy to remain calm.
It has nothing to do with Covid, although the pandemic does seem to have highlighted the issue.
It's rare to have a day where I'm not saying, 'I tell what's pissed me off today...' . It's sometimes funny (and cathartic to tell your mates to have a laugh about it) but it is also rare to have a day where there isn't something that makes your heart pump purple piss!
Working from home today to catch up on admin matters so it should keep me out of trouble
For me, yes, managing expectation has become more and more difficult in recent years (43 + VAT now) but then I have always struggled with it. Dealing with the general public (in everyday life) is making me buy more Lucky Dips so I can win the jackpot, buy myself an island and get away from ignorant and stupid people.
People sometimes think you have a short fuse, or are in permanent Victor Meldrew mode, but when you are subjected to little episodes/incidents/scenarios all day almost every day, they tend to build up. The lowest common denominator prevails. As much as I try to take a deep breath (which works sometimes) and ignore, it's not that easy to remain calm.
It has nothing to do with Covid, although the pandemic does seem to have highlighted the issue.
It's rare to have a day where I'm not saying, 'I tell what's pissed me off today...' . It's sometimes funny (and cathartic to tell your mates to have a laugh about it) but it is also rare to have a day where there isn't something that makes your heart pump purple piss!
Working from home today to catch up on admin matters so it should keep me out of trouble
totally feel your pain OP, tired of peoples bulls
t and refusal to take accountability or personal responsibility for anything.
'They never called me back'
did you chase?
'no, shouldn't have to'
no, you shouldn't, but if you want something done, you need to, rather than waiting 4 weeks and then randomly venting to me about a department i have nothing to do with.
t and refusal to take accountability or personal responsibility for anything.'They never called me back'
did you chase?
'no, shouldn't have to'
no, you shouldn't, but if you want something done, you need to, rather than waiting 4 weeks and then randomly venting to me about a department i have nothing to do with.
DaveH23 said:
13-quid for a mug?
This generation of people is simply unbearable at times.
The I take offence stuff pisses me right off, especially for someone else not themselves, we all have to work together yet these wokeists can't seem to realise that for some people it's hard trying to adjust as they bring with them 2 years of old ways. Give them time, dont expect them to know that saying one word is not right to you, take a knee once in a while
The adverts dont help, it's all about you, your whatever, your way, it just encourages this selfish, bullish attitude that pervades the modern world.
Driving is now a monumentally tiresome affair mostly, total disregard for certain rules, instant heckling the moment you do anything wrong in their eyes, incessant horn bibbing even if they are in the wrong, it is truly awful these days.
Politicians who never take any blame for anything unless it suits them, companies who value profit over everything, their customers, their staff, this is just encouraging all of teh above.
We are the worst generation of people to ever live I am afraid yet we have the most, and it is really. really sad.
The I take offence stuff pisses me right off, especially for someone else not themselves, we all have to work together yet these wokeists can't seem to realise that for some people it's hard trying to adjust as they bring with them 2 years of old ways. Give them time, dont expect them to know that saying one word is not right to you, take a knee once in a while
The adverts dont help, it's all about you, your whatever, your way, it just encourages this selfish, bullish attitude that pervades the modern world.
Driving is now a monumentally tiresome affair mostly, total disregard for certain rules, instant heckling the moment you do anything wrong in their eyes, incessant horn bibbing even if they are in the wrong, it is truly awful these days.
Politicians who never take any blame for anything unless it suits them, companies who value profit over everything, their customers, their staff, this is just encouraging all of teh above.
We are the worst generation of people to ever live I am afraid yet we have the most, and it is really. really sad.
have a day with me managing 10'000 of social housing props and estates
you literally have no idea of how entitled people, most of whom have never worked a day in their lives, nor contributed to society in anyway, are.
For some reason everyone is utterly terrified of "reputation" so the bending over backwards and ludicrous decisions that get made to placate people are staggering.
we endlessly hear "I'm off to my MP, cllr etc". little do they know, people like me tend to have extremely good relationships with elected members. when people are being fools, we will tend to quietly agree this and that is the matter dealt with. Or sometimes if not and the elected member is being an utter tool, I will merrily play letter ping pong with them. being an elected member means very little in reality.
A while back, we had a lot of BNP cllr's elected. these became UKIP (the acceptable face of racists) over time. the odds of that bunch of knuckle dragging racists getting anything achieved was always going to be nil.
follow "angry people in local newspapers" on FB, if you want a flavour of the great banal mentality of the country.
you literally have no idea of how entitled people, most of whom have never worked a day in their lives, nor contributed to society in anyway, are.
For some reason everyone is utterly terrified of "reputation" so the bending over backwards and ludicrous decisions that get made to placate people are staggering.
we endlessly hear "I'm off to my MP, cllr etc". little do they know, people like me tend to have extremely good relationships with elected members. when people are being fools, we will tend to quietly agree this and that is the matter dealt with. Or sometimes if not and the elected member is being an utter tool, I will merrily play letter ping pong with them. being an elected member means very little in reality.
A while back, we had a lot of BNP cllr's elected. these became UKIP (the acceptable face of racists) over time. the odds of that bunch of knuckle dragging racists getting anything achieved was always going to be nil.
follow "angry people in local newspapers" on FB, if you want a flavour of the great banal mentality of the country.
What is they say that defines getting old - “one’s narrow waist and broad mind change places”? As you get older you amass more life-information that enables you to refine both your views and actions which invariably alters how you view society as a whole. And because you have years of experience to draw from you naturally view others with less experience as somehow inferior, annoying, stupid, etc... which from your perspective they are but from theirs they aren’t.
People have always been annoying, stupid, etc... How was it ever possible or acceptable for landlords to say ‘No Blacks’. How stupid was society to think it was OK to smoke on the underground, not worry about seatbelts, and for homosexuality to be illegal?
The only thing that’s different today are the contexts of annoyance and stupidity that prevail and that evidence of it is in far plainer sight which gives the impression that there’s more of it about.
It is also worth sometimes, examining the things that make you annoyed at how others act because sometimes (but by no means always) you find a good argument or reason. At lot of older people get all frothy abut Health and Safety.... something that is designed to help people stop doing harm to themselves or others.
Same with the idea that there’s a generation of people with an over-inflated sense of entitlement. There are certainly many that are guilty of this, partly because the generations that went before permitted the evolution of welfare that actually fed that entitlement. But for every person demanding a four-bed detached council house never having worked a day in their life, there’s countless more grateful for whatever roof is put over their head. We rarely see them but stories of the former abound and it’s thus this than skews our views.
It’s very much a young/old thing and worth remembering that the younger generation look to the older generation with equal contempt at their failure to embrace progression and a deep-rooted desire to not only retain a grip on the past but return to it (Brexit being the most obvious example of this. Covid and Vaccines are others).
There are some truly stupid people out there. But I don’t think they come close to defining society.
People have always been annoying, stupid, etc... How was it ever possible or acceptable for landlords to say ‘No Blacks’. How stupid was society to think it was OK to smoke on the underground, not worry about seatbelts, and for homosexuality to be illegal?
The only thing that’s different today are the contexts of annoyance and stupidity that prevail and that evidence of it is in far plainer sight which gives the impression that there’s more of it about.
It is also worth sometimes, examining the things that make you annoyed at how others act because sometimes (but by no means always) you find a good argument or reason. At lot of older people get all frothy abut Health and Safety.... something that is designed to help people stop doing harm to themselves or others.
Same with the idea that there’s a generation of people with an over-inflated sense of entitlement. There are certainly many that are guilty of this, partly because the generations that went before permitted the evolution of welfare that actually fed that entitlement. But for every person demanding a four-bed detached council house never having worked a day in their life, there’s countless more grateful for whatever roof is put over their head. We rarely see them but stories of the former abound and it’s thus this than skews our views.
It’s very much a young/old thing and worth remembering that the younger generation look to the older generation with equal contempt at their failure to embrace progression and a deep-rooted desire to not only retain a grip on the past but return to it (Brexit being the most obvious example of this. Covid and Vaccines are others).
There are some truly stupid people out there. But I don’t think they come close to defining society.
austinsmirk said:
follow "angry people in local newspapers" on FB, if you want a flavour of the great banal mentality of the country.
I came off Face Ache a while ago. My profile exists purely to give me access to my occasional post on my business page. The content shared on Face Ache wasn't helping my inner equilibrium. The average joe is a combination of being thick as pig st, entitled mentality, lazy as fk, expects everything for nothing, etc etc etc.
I used to have reasonable expectations of fellow shipmates being in the forces. I joined up straight from school, a private school at that, so had little exposure to how dumb the average joe is. Then in the forces, even those with no academic qualifications have a certain level of intelligence to be there.
So when I came out to the civvy world, it was a shock just how dumb fk the average person is. And they are seemingly getting worse.
It doesn't help that my job has changed so i have to semi-regularly deal with the public on technical matters and generally the kind of people who ring me up are doing so because they are pretty thick to have fked something up so badly.
So yes my tolerance of the general public is very low. Albeit i am more expecting them to be thickos compared to before when i had some expectation of a modicum of intelligence.
t, entitled mentality, lazy as fk, expects everything for nothing, etc etc etc.I used to have reasonable expectations of fellow shipmates being in the forces. I joined up straight from school, a private school at that, so had little exposure to how dumb the average joe is. Then in the forces, even those with no academic qualifications have a certain level of intelligence to be there.
So when I came out to the civvy world, it was a shock just how dumb f
k the average person is. And they are seemingly getting worse.It doesn't help that my job has changed so i have to semi-regularly deal with the public on technical matters and generally the kind of people who ring me up are doing so because they are pretty thick to have f
ked something up so badly. So yes my tolerance of the general public is very low. Albeit i am more expecting them to be thickos compared to before when i had some expectation of a modicum of intelligence.
Psycho Warren said:
The average joe is a combination of being thick as pig st, entitled mentality, lazy as fk, expects everything for nothing, etc etc etc.
I used to have reasonable expectations of fellow shipmates being in the forces. I joined up straight from school, a private school at that, so had little exposure to how dumb the average joe is. Then in the forces, even those with no academic qualifications have a certain level of intelligence to be there.
So when I came out to the civvy world, it was a shock just how dumb fk the average person is. And they are seemingly getting worse.
It doesn't help that my job has changed so i have to semi-regularly deal with the public on technical matters and generally the kind of people who ring me up are doing so because they are pretty thick to have fked something up so badly.
So yes my tolerance of the general public is very low. Albeit i am more expecting them to be thickos compared to before when i had some expectation of a modicum of intelligence.
I love your posts PW. I'm sure we'll have to have a virtual pint in a flat roofed pub at some point t, entitled mentality, lazy as fk, expects everything for nothing, etc etc etc.I used to have reasonable expectations of fellow shipmates being in the forces. I joined up straight from school, a private school at that, so had little exposure to how dumb the average joe is. Then in the forces, even those with no academic qualifications have a certain level of intelligence to be there.
So when I came out to the civvy world, it was a shock just how dumb f
k the average person is. And they are seemingly getting worse.It doesn't help that my job has changed so i have to semi-regularly deal with the public on technical matters and generally the kind of people who ring me up are doing so because they are pretty thick to have f
ked something up so badly. So yes my tolerance of the general public is very low. Albeit i am more expecting them to be thickos compared to before when i had some expectation of a modicum of intelligence.
when I started working after school, I just assumed everyone older than me, must be far more intelligent and worldly wise etc. I'd never met older people that were not and weren't well rounded. I'll be honest it took me a while to realise most people are really really thick. Maybe not that long........
Managing expectations is a double edged sword - and I hate it.
Depends what you're doin, but it can require some level of thinking and it's not exactly a quick task. I get the idea it's meant to stop a big fallout, but in our case we still seem to attract some flak, and then waste a few days putting it right.
There's been a few situations where I think we could have let an issue go full term and it'd be easier to fix at the end...
We lost one contract because we weren't massaging some tts ego enough. We had to visit site for something else and learned that whilst the new chap sends lots of emails...costs are more than double, delays still ongoing, and the work is not compliant...
Depends what you're doin, but it can require some level of thinking and it's not exactly a quick task. I get the idea it's meant to stop a big fallout, but in our case we still seem to attract some flak, and then waste a few days putting it right.
There's been a few situations where I think we could have let an issue go full term and it'd be easier to fix at the end...
We lost one contract because we weren't massaging some t
ts ego enough. We had to visit site for something else and learned that whilst the new chap sends lots of emails...costs are more than double, delays still ongoing, and the work is not compliant... 
I'd be of the mind one's perception / awareness changes as you get older, as opposed to the remarkable coincidence that society repeatedly just collapses into an utter hell hole as soon as each generation 'gets old'.
People have always been mostly stupid, your family and friends and you yourself are probably part of the great stupid masses, you just don't think you are, thanks to your own slice of stupidity (not directed at you personally, at everyone).
Think how different you would be if you were born a woman in Afghanistan or a minority group in 80s Compton, LA.
Perhaps use that wisdom to realise that you're really not as responsible for how great you think you are as you think you are, and that vast amounts of what you think you've managed to do through your own brilliance are fluke, coincidence, good fortune, genetics, or dare I say, privilege. Use that to be a little more humble of your own position and accepting / understanding that how other people are is probably also strongly impacted by things outside of their control.
Then give up on all of that and have a bloody good cathartic moan about it on PH
I'd like to try and stay objective as I age and will put some effort into doing so, I don't think there's much more one can do to try and keep calm about the state of the world
Or alcohol. That'll do it
People have always been mostly stupid, your family and friends and you yourself are probably part of the great stupid masses, you just don't think you are, thanks to your own slice of stupidity (not directed at you personally, at everyone).
Think how different you would be if you were born a woman in Afghanistan or a minority group in 80s Compton, LA.
Perhaps use that wisdom to realise that you're really not as responsible for how great you think you are as you think you are, and that vast amounts of what you think you've managed to do through your own brilliance are fluke, coincidence, good fortune, genetics, or dare I say, privilege. Use that to be a little more humble of your own position and accepting / understanding that how other people are is probably also strongly impacted by things outside of their control.
Then give up on all of that and have a bloody good cathartic moan about it on PH
I'd like to try and stay objective as I age and will put some effort into doing so, I don't think there's much more one can do to try and keep calm about the state of the world
Or alcohol. That'll do it
austinsmirk said:
Psycho Warren said:
The average joe is a combination of being thick as pig st, entitled mentality, lazy as fk, expects everything for nothing, etc etc etc.
I used to have reasonable expectations of fellow shipmates being in the forces. I joined up straight from school, a private school at that, so had little exposure to how dumb the average joe is. Then in the forces, even those with no academic qualifications have a certain level of intelligence to be there.
So when I came out to the civvy world, it was a shock just how dumb fk the average person is. And they are seemingly getting worse.
It doesn't help that my job has changed so i have to semi-regularly deal with the public on technical matters and generally the kind of people who ring me up are doing so because they are pretty thick to have fked something up so badly.
So yes my tolerance of the general public is very low. Albeit i am more expecting them to be thickos compared to before when i had some expectation of a modicum of intelligence.
I love your posts PW. I'm sure we'll have to have a virtual pint in a flat roofed pub at some point t, entitled mentality, lazy as fk, expects everything for nothing, etc etc etc.I used to have reasonable expectations of fellow shipmates being in the forces. I joined up straight from school, a private school at that, so had little exposure to how dumb the average joe is. Then in the forces, even those with no academic qualifications have a certain level of intelligence to be there.
So when I came out to the civvy world, it was a shock just how dumb f
k the average person is. And they are seemingly getting worse.It doesn't help that my job has changed so i have to semi-regularly deal with the public on technical matters and generally the kind of people who ring me up are doing so because they are pretty thick to have f
ked something up so badly. So yes my tolerance of the general public is very low. Albeit i am more expecting them to be thickos compared to before when i had some expectation of a modicum of intelligence.
when I started working after school, I just assumed everyone older than me, must be far more intelligent and worldly wise etc. I'd never met older people that were not and weren't well rounded. I'll be honest it took me a while to realise most people are really really thick. Maybe not that long........
Captain Raymond Holt said:
austinsmirk said:
Psycho Warren said:
The average joe is a combination of being thick as pig st, entitled mentality, lazy as fk, expects everything for nothing, etc etc etc.
I used to have reasonable expectations of fellow shipmates being in the forces. I joined up straight from school, a private school at that, so had little exposure to how dumb the average joe is. Then in the forces, even those with no academic qualifications have a certain level of intelligence to be there.
So when I came out to the civvy world, it was a shock just how dumb fk the average person is. And they are seemingly getting worse.
It doesn't help that my job has changed so i have to semi-regularly deal with the public on technical matters and generally the kind of people who ring me up are doing so because they are pretty thick to have fked something up so badly.
So yes my tolerance of the general public is very low. Albeit i am more expecting them to be thickos compared to before when i had some expectation of a modicum of intelligence.
I love your posts PW. I'm sure we'll have to have a virtual pint in a flat roofed pub at some point t, entitled mentality, lazy as fk, expects everything for nothing, etc etc etc.I used to have reasonable expectations of fellow shipmates being in the forces. I joined up straight from school, a private school at that, so had little exposure to how dumb the average joe is. Then in the forces, even those with no academic qualifications have a certain level of intelligence to be there.
So when I came out to the civvy world, it was a shock just how dumb f
k the average person is. And they are seemingly getting worse.It doesn't help that my job has changed so i have to semi-regularly deal with the public on technical matters and generally the kind of people who ring me up are doing so because they are pretty thick to have f
ked something up so badly. So yes my tolerance of the general public is very low. Albeit i am more expecting them to be thickos compared to before when i had some expectation of a modicum of intelligence.
when I started working after school, I just assumed everyone older than me, must be far more intelligent and worldly wise etc. I'd never met older people that were not and weren't well rounded. I'll be honest it took me a while to realise most people are really really thick. Maybe not that long........
I'm a great believer in 'The Peter Principle' , everyone gets promoted until they reach thier level of in competence.
Equally concerning.
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