Jaded palate / rose tinted glasses?
Discussion
When my wife and I got together we didn’t have any money. One of the first meals I cooked for her was an approximation of an Italian dish using bacon and served with grated cheddar and Lambrusco. Today I would find it crap but back then we loved it.
Occasionally we would go out for a meal but it wasn’t anything more exotic than the local pizza/pasta joint or Indian restaurant. Yet we really enjoyed it.
Many years later we are much better off financially and can afford better ingredients and have eaten at expensive restaurants. Yet our pleasure at doing so has generally decreased.
Same with cars. My first proper was a Nissan Micra and despite it being objectively crap I had a great time. Even just driving it around town was fun because I’d never had a car before.
My first time in a Porsche was an amazing experience. I used to travel for hours to see cars or to drive one. Yet now I never bother.
It is a bit frustrating that when I was younger there was stuff and experiences I wanted yet now I’m older and could afford them, I no longer want them.
Anyone else found that they have become jaded as they have aged or have you managed to retain your youthful exuberance?
Occasionally we would go out for a meal but it wasn’t anything more exotic than the local pizza/pasta joint or Indian restaurant. Yet we really enjoyed it.
Many years later we are much better off financially and can afford better ingredients and have eaten at expensive restaurants. Yet our pleasure at doing so has generally decreased.
Same with cars. My first proper was a Nissan Micra and despite it being objectively crap I had a great time. Even just driving it around town was fun because I’d never had a car before.
My first time in a Porsche was an amazing experience. I used to travel for hours to see cars or to drive one. Yet now I never bother.
It is a bit frustrating that when I was younger there was stuff and experiences I wanted yet now I’m older and could afford them, I no longer want them.
Anyone else found that they have become jaded as they have aged or have you managed to retain your youthful exuberance?
Absolutely, and I hate it! 
One example that particularly stands out: my wife and I enjoy taking cruises and had one booked for Autumn 2001 in a
basic balcony cabin. Cruises were severely impacted by the aftermath of 9/11 and our particular itinerary was cancelled.
We were offered a new date on the same ship in a completely different part of the world (New England instead of Eastern Med),
but as compensation, we were offered the chance to upgrade to the Royal suite for something like $1000 (in total, not per night!)
It was insane!!
Grand Piano, fully stocked (and replenished) bar, butler, shower and wet room bigger than most cabins, etc...
As a bonus, we also had ports of call that most English cruisers never visit, such as Quebec, Bar Harbour, etc.
We enjoyed every second of that cruise, but subsequently going back to 'normal' cabins was a huge downer
which left me wondering if it's worth having a taste of the high life if you are unable to maintain that lifestyle?
One example that particularly stands out: my wife and I enjoy taking cruises and had one booked for Autumn 2001 in a
basic balcony cabin. Cruises were severely impacted by the aftermath of 9/11 and our particular itinerary was cancelled.
We were offered a new date on the same ship in a completely different part of the world (New England instead of Eastern Med),
but as compensation, we were offered the chance to upgrade to the Royal suite for something like $1000 (in total, not per night!)
It was insane!!
Grand Piano, fully stocked (and replenished) bar, butler, shower and wet room bigger than most cabins, etc...
As a bonus, we also had ports of call that most English cruisers never visit, such as Quebec, Bar Harbour, etc.
We enjoyed every second of that cruise, but subsequently going back to 'normal' cabins was a huge downer
which left me wondering if it's worth having a taste of the high life if you are unable to maintain that lifestyle?
I'm hardly the biggest fan of Dan Bilzerian, but he did make an interesting point. He said that having vast resources just means that your expectations rise fast. He said that for the average person, a Lamborghini would be a 10/10 car, but for the likes of him it's just a 7/10 or even lower, depending on model. Same with eating out, and many other things. It's known as the "hedonic treadmill".
This is one reason why consumerism will never die out. Most of us always have an intrinsic desire for something "better", newer, or just different. We're a fickle species.
This is one reason why consumerism will never die out. Most of us always have an intrinsic desire for something "better", newer, or just different. We're a fickle species.
I don't share your experience with food, but that's something of a double-edged sword from a waistline perspective!
Cars though? Very definitely! Some of my very best memories are behind the wheel of a car... I first met my wife on Christmas Eve 1998, a day I remember with great fondness as the day I escaped the assembled relatives and got through an entire tank of fuel in 120 miles ragging my 306 Gti-6 around a completely deserted Exmoor, or pulling donuts in the field at Snetterton on a PH camping weekend in the dark in Kermit the ZT-T 260 whilst the jumped up little American security guard was running around threatening to have us all deported or whatever...
Nowadays, I'm trundling around in an XC60 hybrid which, at sub 5.5 seconds to 60 is actually the fastest car I've ever owned, and I've actually got it fitted with one of those little driver tracker boxes usually the domain of teenaged boys as it saves a fortune on insurance (recommendation - don't spend a few years driving a company car with a company large enough to self insure and expect any insurance company to recognise your no claims when you leave!) and it really doesn't bother me!
The thing with that, though, is that the petrol head definitely still lurks within! I've just come to the realisation that, especially living inside the M25 where the population has increased 20% in the last couple of decades, cars have increased in size probably even more and there are essentially no new roads that constantly chomping at the bit for a stretch of open road to enjoy is a surefire path to madness!
The biggest area of potential conflict with my wife, though, is holidays! She likes a nice 4 star hotel with a spa, but to me they all just feel like yet another business trip!
Cars though? Very definitely! Some of my very best memories are behind the wheel of a car... I first met my wife on Christmas Eve 1998, a day I remember with great fondness as the day I escaped the assembled relatives and got through an entire tank of fuel in 120 miles ragging my 306 Gti-6 around a completely deserted Exmoor, or pulling donuts in the field at Snetterton on a PH camping weekend in the dark in Kermit the ZT-T 260 whilst the jumped up little American security guard was running around threatening to have us all deported or whatever...
Nowadays, I'm trundling around in an XC60 hybrid which, at sub 5.5 seconds to 60 is actually the fastest car I've ever owned, and I've actually got it fitted with one of those little driver tracker boxes usually the domain of teenaged boys as it saves a fortune on insurance (recommendation - don't spend a few years driving a company car with a company large enough to self insure and expect any insurance company to recognise your no claims when you leave!) and it really doesn't bother me!
The thing with that, though, is that the petrol head definitely still lurks within! I've just come to the realisation that, especially living inside the M25 where the population has increased 20% in the last couple of decades, cars have increased in size probably even more and there are essentially no new roads that constantly chomping at the bit for a stretch of open road to enjoy is a surefire path to madness!
The biggest area of potential conflict with my wife, though, is holidays! She likes a nice 4 star hotel with a spa, but to me they all just feel like yet another business trip!
It depends on your attitude really. I've been broke then flush, then really broke, then reasonably successful again. It's a lot more fun and a lot less stressful having money to burn, but ultimately if I had to go back to just about managing then I would, and I'd try and make the best of it. Every time I get a nice car or fly in the sharp end of the plane, I always think to myself "enjoy it, because tomorrow it could all be gone". As soon as you start thinking that this will never end and it's what I deserve/want/need...then it's official: you're a douchebag.
I’ve had lots of cars, fast slow big small expensive cheap
I keep looking at two to rebuy now, a 1.0 saxo and a 106 gti
They were my favourite cars ever, really great things
But I’m worried if I get them they won’t be as I remember
Probably now, because I’m married I won’t be out in them till 5 in the morning being a numpty or rodgering some tasty girl on the cramped back seat. I suspect when I’m 80, I’ll want what I have now.
I keep looking at two to rebuy now, a 1.0 saxo and a 106 gti
They were my favourite cars ever, really great things
But I’m worried if I get them they won’t be as I remember
Probably now, because I’m married I won’t be out in them till 5 in the morning being a numpty or rodgering some tasty girl on the cramped back seat. I suspect when I’m 80, I’ll want what I have now.
easytiger123 said:
It depends on your attitude really. I've been broke then flush, then really broke, then reasonably successful again. It's a lot more fun and a lot less stressful having money to burn, but ultimately if I had to go back to just about managing then I would, and I'd try and make the best of it. Every time I get a nice car or fly in the sharp end of the plane, I always think to myself "enjoy it, because tomorrow it could all be gone". As soon as you start thinking that this will never end and it's what I deserve/want/need...then it's official: you're a douchebag.
Hasn't it been proved scientifically that there is diminishing marginal utility with wealth? Once you don't have to worry about paying the gas bill anymore, additional wealth adds little happiness.
t.plenty said:
I think I'm lucky to be able to find just as much joy in driving cheap cars, staying in cheap hotels and eating cheap food as I ever did. TBH it's almost become a badge of honour. I scoff as I observe others sucked into the endless trap of aspiration.
I’m lucky like you in many respects, some of my friends are ina a cycle of chasing happiness that I thankfully get walking a jack Russel Spare tyre said:
plenty said:
I think I'm lucky to be able to find just as much joy in driving cheap cars, staying in cheap hotels and eating cheap food as I ever did. TBH it's almost become a badge of honour. I scoff as I observe others sucked into the endless trap of aspiration.
I’m lucky like you in many respects, some of my friends are ina a cycle of chasing happiness that I thankfully get walking a jack Russel 
Not jaded - but I do not repeat too many things- trips to tracks are a notable exception. There are many places to see and out of the way spots to discover.
I rarely return to good restaurants around the world though if course the local Starbucks is handy for example.
When you are young there are first time experiences that are truly exciting. -first car,first real girlfriend,first plane trip or trip abroad and the first time you get a completely new car. The new 1979 Toyota Celica seemed like magic. The new car smell,perfect upholstery,running it in,keeping it perfect and so on were great fun
Today picking up an objectively vastly superior car is not at all boring-I still enjoy that first drive. It is just a more familiar experience.
I have no bucket list of must-do things. I do not dream of going into space or buying a Koenigssegg. There are places I am interested in visiting and will get to some of them.
I think is is not being jaded but seeing or doing new things through the eye of experience.
I rarely return to good restaurants around the world though if course the local Starbucks is handy for example.
When you are young there are first time experiences that are truly exciting. -first car,first real girlfriend,first plane trip or trip abroad and the first time you get a completely new car. The new 1979 Toyota Celica seemed like magic. The new car smell,perfect upholstery,running it in,keeping it perfect and so on were great fun
Today picking up an objectively vastly superior car is not at all boring-I still enjoy that first drive. It is just a more familiar experience.
I have no bucket list of must-do things. I do not dream of going into space or buying a Koenigssegg. There are places I am interested in visiting and will get to some of them.
I think is is not being jaded but seeing or doing new things through the eye of experience.
Car aspiration was the thing that always kept me striving, then followed by homes.
It started by selling off my Scalextric set at 15 years old that I had built up from nothing, usually bits of track or cars as xmas or birthday presents.
That went into my first 50cc, bought with a blown engine for £45 and rebuilt in my dads garage.
Over the years each subsequent purchase was rebuilt/restored and funded the next move up.
Finally I got there, mint, low miles, totally original moonstone RS500 and one of the rarest examples to boot. The car I had wanted since I was 18.
Same with the houses, sat in the garden one evening about 30 years later after that moped, I looked back at it and thought "how the hell did I get here"
Problem was i did not want to go back inside, as my home life was miserable.
That was 10 years ago at the end of this month. Its all now gone due to the subsequent divorce.
I now drive a 2003 Focus 1.6 estate, bought for £500 3 years ago and I love it, great little motor, home has also long gone, but starting fresh yet again just like I did with the sale of that Scalextric set.
It started by selling off my Scalextric set at 15 years old that I had built up from nothing, usually bits of track or cars as xmas or birthday presents.
That went into my first 50cc, bought with a blown engine for £45 and rebuilt in my dads garage.
Over the years each subsequent purchase was rebuilt/restored and funded the next move up.
Finally I got there, mint, low miles, totally original moonstone RS500 and one of the rarest examples to boot. The car I had wanted since I was 18.
Same with the houses, sat in the garden one evening about 30 years later after that moped, I looked back at it and thought "how the hell did I get here"
Problem was i did not want to go back inside, as my home life was miserable.
That was 10 years ago at the end of this month. Its all now gone due to the subsequent divorce.
I now drive a 2003 Focus 1.6 estate, bought for £500 3 years ago and I love it, great little motor, home has also long gone, but starting fresh yet again just like I did with the sale of that Scalextric set.
Edited by PAUL.S. on Sunday 13th February 12:48
I am with you on food. I remember reading Michael winner’s restaurant reviews and thinking he was a bit of a prat for always commenting on the choice of water, these days I know what he means…
Luckily for me it’s still a question of value. I can have a meal for £20 and get the same satisfaction out of it as one 10x more. The food is the main thing, and luckily new restaurants of all descriptions are constantly opening and renewing themselves around here.
Car wise I guess I’m stuck in the mindset of mechanical purity over gadgets and 0-60 times. Easy answer for the road is a bike (not superbike). Much more satisfying getting it ‘right’ and just overall more enjoyable on a sunny day.
Luckily for me it’s still a question of value. I can have a meal for £20 and get the same satisfaction out of it as one 10x more. The food is the main thing, and luckily new restaurants of all descriptions are constantly opening and renewing themselves around here.
Car wise I guess I’m stuck in the mindset of mechanical purity over gadgets and 0-60 times. Easy answer for the road is a bike (not superbike). Much more satisfying getting it ‘right’ and just overall more enjoyable on a sunny day.
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