Come on. Own up - Housework
Discussion
https://metro.co.uk/2023/06/27/every-woman-i-know-...
Obviously Mumsnet is not fully representative and unhappy partners will always moan, but I do know a few friends who are lazy, selfish b
ds. But then, like myself, know others who just get on with it, have been full on with their kids and don't treat their other halves as if they should be chained to the house.
Unfortunately I can't create a poll but opinions welcome. Is housework still the woman's job or do you get stuck in and do what's necessary. Or other?
Call me under the thumb or whatever, but it's every bit my responsibility as hers to sort st out and raise our kids. It might not be exactly 50/50 as noone is counting but it's at least equitable and noone feels taken advantage of.
(Puts on flame suit
)
Obviously Mumsnet is not fully representative and unhappy partners will always moan, but I do know a few friends who are lazy, selfish b
ds. But then, like myself, know others who just get on with it, have been full on with their kids and don't treat their other halves as if they should be chained to the house.Unfortunately I can't create a poll but opinions welcome. Is housework still the woman's job or do you get stuck in and do what's necessary. Or other?
Call me under the thumb or whatever, but it's every bit my responsibility as hers to sort s
t out and raise our kids. It might not be exactly 50/50 as noone is counting but it's at least equitable and noone feels taken advantage of.(Puts on flame suit
)
There's certain jobs that I'm not really a fan of doing so the wife tends to pick them up
However, she's out at work until late evening 3 nights a week so she comes home to her tea made, washing up done, a load of washing done etc.
I don't tend to notice "dust" as such so am a bugger for not dusting things but I do run the hoover around and get the steam mop out
So yeah, pretty much 50/50. As it should be.
I learned to look after myself after my divorce. Her ex husband was the polar opposite - brought up in a large Irish catholic household where Mum did everything and the wife said it was like having another child in the house
However, she's out at work until late evening 3 nights a week so she comes home to her tea made, washing up done, a load of washing done etc.
I don't tend to notice "dust" as such so am a bugger for not dusting things but I do run the hoover around and get the steam mop out
So yeah, pretty much 50/50. As it should be.
I learned to look after myself after my divorce. Her ex husband was the polar opposite - brought up in a large Irish catholic household where Mum did everything and the wife said it was like having another child in the house
My wife has never washed a car, changed a wheel, serviced her car, done plumbing or electrical work, put up shelves, setup the wifi network, built a fence and much more that only I have ever done in our 30 year relationship and furthermore would be horrified if I expected her to do any of those. Should I feel aggrieved at that?
Any relationship should be a partnership, it does not have to be 50/50 on all tasks but it should be equitable and both parties happy with what the other contributes.
More than that if someone is unhappy then they should raise it with their partner!
Any relationship should be a partnership, it does not have to be 50/50 on all tasks but it should be equitable and both parties happy with what the other contributes.
More than that if someone is unhappy then they should raise it with their partner!
My now wife and I bought our first house within 6 months of meeting and having never lived together. She was an Estate Agent, I was a Conveyancing clerk, it was the early noughties, you couldn't lose . . . but it meant we hadn't established any skill sets. It was only on the first night I realised she can't cook. Lucky I can - my Mum didn't raise me to be 'a useless man' as she puts it and I'd had to survive whilst away at Uni.
I'd get a 'honey-do' list when Mrs T worked on Saturdays - put the washing on etc. - but that was just a prompt in case some jobs didn't occur to me, as opposed to not being able to do it myself.
Years later, when our eldest was on the way, we both established that we neither of us had a clue what we were doing with kids. We'd seen the way our friends worked - the woman seemed to lay claim to being the maternal one and therefore knew best. Some of the men didn't dare do anything with their kids without the wife's say-so. That wasn't us - we both mucked in and worked it out as we went along. They seem to have got to 13 and 16 OK!
I'd get a 'honey-do' list when Mrs T worked on Saturdays - put the washing on etc. - but that was just a prompt in case some jobs didn't occur to me, as opposed to not being able to do it myself.
Years later, when our eldest was on the way, we both established that we neither of us had a clue what we were doing with kids. We'd seen the way our friends worked - the woman seemed to lay claim to being the maternal one and therefore knew best. Some of the men didn't dare do anything with their kids without the wife's say-so. That wasn't us - we both mucked in and worked it out as we went along. They seem to have got to 13 and 16 OK!
We tend to play to our strengths at home.
I do 90% of Evening Meals, most of the washing up. Mrs does breakfast, laundry and making the bed, which She is obsessed with. I do 100% of the driving when we're together. I take care of finances; Mrs takes care of Childcare. I do the weekly shop etc.
On balance, I probally put an hour or two extra into it every week, but the Mrs has a harder Job, if less well-paid.
I do 90% of Evening Meals, most of the washing up. Mrs does breakfast, laundry and making the bed, which She is obsessed with. I do 100% of the driving when we're together. I take care of finances; Mrs takes care of Childcare. I do the weekly shop etc.
On balance, I probally put an hour or two extra into it every week, but the Mrs has a harder Job, if less well-paid.
JimmyConwayNW said:
Sounds like a woman having a moan.
That’s exactly what it is. How’s she got time to be posting crap on mumsnet anyway when there’s probably a bloody great load of ironing sat there? If she’d get on with it her husband might even let her give him a blowjob to say thanks. Come on girls, back to work. Tea won’t make itself!simon_harris said:
My wife has never washed a car, changed a wheel, serviced her car, done plumbing or electrical work, put up shelves, setup the wifi network, built a fence and much more that only I have ever done in our 30 year relationship and furthermore would be horrified if I expected her to do any of those. Should I feel aggrieved at that?
Any relationship should be a partnership, it does not have to be 50/50 on all tasks but it should be equitable and both parties happy with what the other contributes.
Bob on. There will never be a total 50:50 split on chores as there's some things one or other can't\won't do, but it should be a fair split.Any relationship should be a partnership, it does not have to be 50/50 on all tasks but it should be equitable and both parties happy with what the other contributes.
If I've spent all day outside digging 'oles, painting windows, servicing the car, whatever, I'd feel pretty damn aggreived if I was greeted with madame sat on her arse having done nothing all day, now expecting me to clean the house and make dinner "because it's your turn".
We've just had the housework argument in our house.
the 19 year old niece has moved in been with us a year now and does fk all but make a fking mess (I can now see why her Mum and Dad booted her out lazy little bh) The Mrs works four days a week.
I work away so only get Saturday and Sunday at home so was spending loads of time on a Saturday cleaning the house and clearing up the Nieces ste with the Mrs. No one does the lawns so these were left to me.
The niece works every Saturday so did none of the cleaning.
It now gets done during the week except the lawns.
the 19 year old niece has moved in been with us a year now and does f
k all but make a fking mess (I can now see why her Mum and Dad booted her out lazy little bh) The Mrs works four days a week.I work away so only get Saturday and Sunday at home so was spending loads of time on a Saturday cleaning the house and clearing up the Nieces s
te with the Mrs. No one does the lawns so these were left to me.The niece works every Saturday so did none of the cleaning.
It now gets done during the week except the lawns.
Colonel Cupcake said:
wildoliver said:
I'm happy to do housework but I'm not allowed. Apparently I don't do it properly.
Same here. I spend all day at work cleaning but I am happy to peg out the washing. I'm not allowed to, though, as I use the 'wrong' pegs on the 'wrong' clothes.I do blue jobs, she does pink jobs, easy and worked well for years. Pink jobs are housework and most of the cooking, but not all. Blue jobs are fixing things, household budget, weekly shop and most of the DIY type stuff, but not all.of it. She hates me cleaning as I don't do it well enough, I would not want her to fix a leaking tap or service the car.
Divide and conquer.
I do all the outdoors areas, the bins, the DIY and decorating and do some of the hoovering, dishwasher and general housework but less than 50%.
Other half does all the washing and more of the general housework.
Kids is pretty much 50:50 but alas I haven't mastered lactating yet.
I do all the outdoors areas, the bins, the DIY and decorating and do some of the hoovering, dishwasher and general housework but less than 50%.
Other half does all the washing and more of the general housework.
Kids is pretty much 50:50 but alas I haven't mastered lactating yet.
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