The Course of True Love

[Jonquil]

...never runs smooth as they say.

I've often been amused by pick up lines and put downs so let's see what's in the PH massif's armoury.

Try these for starters:-

Pick up.
Him, "Do you sleep on your front?
Her: "No."
Him "Do you mind if I do?"

Put down.
Him. "Fancy dating?"
Her. "With you? Only the radio carbon kind."

[Shy Torque]

“Nice legs - what time do they open?”

[thenetwork]

'' Can you program your Tesla to drive to my place and hang out so we can check how long our batteries can last ''

'' Hi, I like older women, could you take your makeup off ''

[littleredrooster]

Ya divvn’t sweat much fer a fat lass, d’ya?

Get ya coat - ya’ve pulled!

[thenetwork]

I'm hyperventilating because of you ... could you bring me a paper bag ..


You are the prettiest girl I have ever met ... did you have plastic surgery to look so good ...


''Wanna come and watch Netflix and Chill and we could binge on alcohol, food, chocolate and more alcohol and we could even watch your favourite Netflix show if we get time''

[slevin911]

I hope you have house insurance cause you're about to get your back door smashed in.

When I was younger my go to was ' I'm not trying impress you but I am batman' pure stupid but used to somehow work every time!

[Pieman68]

Working behind the bar in a club I heard some beauties over the years

By far the stand out though, was an approach made by a mate during the ten to two shuffle, as the slow dances came on

"Hiya love, do you fancy a dance?"

"Yeah, i'd love to"

"Great. Can you fk off whilst I talk to your mate then"

[Nethybridge]

Him, to a prospective one-night-stand, "How do you like your eggs in the morning".

Her, unimpressed: " Unfertilised ".

[ I don't get it ]

[Jonquil]

Nethybridge said:

Him, to a prospective one-night-stand, "How do you like your eggs in the morning".

Her, unimpressed: " Unfertilised ".

[ I don't get it ]

A way of saying. "No nookie for you sunshine."

[Caddyshack]

Do you have a mirror in your pocket?

No,? That’s odd, I can see myself in your knickers.

[austinsmirk]

Here’s 10 pence love

What’s that for?

Phone yer mam and tell her yr not coming home.

[bloomen]

Can I call you mummy? I wuv u.

[Fergie87]

A friend once tried multiple times with the line “Nice hair. Do you take it up the stter?”. Surprisingly it got a laugh once.

[Wacky Racer]

If I said you had a beautiful body would you hold it against me?

[jules_s]

Jonquil said:

A way of saying. "No nookie for you sunshine."

Can mean the opposite

[GilletteFan]

I was in a club and this girl came up to inform me "i wasn't getting any tonight". I had the last laugh

[Benten]

One of the best ones I heard... An older guy Mid thirties was chatting to a girl around 20, thought he was cracking on flirting eventually the girl said to him..

'Right, I'm looking for a boyfriend not a pal for my dad, get to fk'

[TUS373]

Want to go halves on a baby?

[TUS373]

Does this smell of chloroform?