Selling a joint mortgage home when one person doesn't.
Discussion
This isn't for me and I've told my mate to join up here and post his problem but I don't think he want to "air his dirty linen in public" but to get the ball rolling on it....
Basically he has split up with his partner (unmarried), he has moved out, she is still there, he pays all the mortgage and always has done, she isn't in a position to pay it on her own but does work, there are two kids involved. He has also done tonnes of stuff to the house himself, she hasn't done much at all.
She says she is staying put in the house. Basically, how does this work, I understand you cant just sell when you are both on the deeds and it would need a court order to sell (is this ££££ to obtain) but wont the court just say she can stay until the kids are 18 or whatever? If that was the case then what would happen if he simply stopped paying the mortgage, I know his credit rating would tank but why would you pay years and years of mortgage for somewhere you aren't living.
Basically he has split up with his partner (unmarried), he has moved out, she is still there, he pays all the mortgage and always has done, she isn't in a position to pay it on her own but does work, there are two kids involved. He has also done tonnes of stuff to the house himself, she hasn't done much at all.
She says she is staying put in the house. Basically, how does this work, I understand you cant just sell when you are both on the deeds and it would need a court order to sell (is this ££££ to obtain) but wont the court just say she can stay until the kids are 18 or whatever? If that was the case then what would happen if he simply stopped paying the mortgage, I know his credit rating would tank but why would you pay years and years of mortgage for somewhere you aren't living.
Depends if he has any thought for the children involved,
My wife left , I stayed in the marital home, no children involved, but I pay half the rent for her and thete isn't children involved.
There is no mortgage because I paid it off after she left, it will be sold shortly, so the payments will stop.
I divorced previously, child involved, we had 2 houses. One was sold and split equity, the other she stayed in with the child, had 3 more, I paid weekly for the child.
Sounds like neither of you give a f
k about the children tbh, or her at all, left looking after them.
My wife left , I stayed in the marital home, no children involved, but I pay half the rent for her and thete isn't children involved.
There is no mortgage because I paid it off after she left, it will be sold shortly, so the payments will stop.
I divorced previously, child involved, we had 2 houses. One was sold and split equity, the other she stayed in with the child, had 3 more, I paid weekly for the child.
Sounds like neither of you give a f
k about the children tbh, or her at all, left looking after them. Yea meant to say both his kids. There is a fair bit of equity in the house as well, she could walk away with a nice lump sum, practically enough to buy a cheap house somewhere nearby, but she is in a nice house at the minute and doesn't have to pay a mortgage, chance of here moving out I'd say is zero.
Doesitdrive said:
Depends if he has any thought for the children involved,
My wife left , I stayed in the marital home, no children involved, but I pay half the rent for her and thete isn't children involved.
There is no mortgage because I paid it off after she left, it will be sold shortly, so the payments will stop.
I divorced previously, child involved, we had 2 houses. One was sold and split equity, the other she stayed in with the child, had 3 more, I paid weekly for the child.
Sounds like neither of you give a f
k about the children tbh, or her at all, left looking after them.
I'm just the messenger here so I'm just sticking to the facts but I don't see why the kids need a big house to live in to feel loved, its not like they would be out on the street, there is a couple of hundred k in equity to share out, he is willing to go 50/50 even though she has never financially contributed.My wife left , I stayed in the marital home, no children involved, but I pay half the rent for her and thete isn't children involved.
There is no mortgage because I paid it off after she left, it will be sold shortly, so the payments will stop.
I divorced previously, child involved, we had 2 houses. One was sold and split equity, the other she stayed in with the child, had 3 more, I paid weekly for the child.
Sounds like neither of you give a f
k about the children tbh, or her at all, left looking after them. Frane Selak said:
I'm just the messenger here so I'm just sticking to the facts but I don't see why the kids need a big house to live in to feel loved, its not like they would be out on the street, there is a couple of hundred k in equity to share out, he is willing to go 50/50 even though she has never financially contributed.
He's going to be in for a rude awakening with that mindset when it goes legal.Mandat said:
Frane Selak said:
I'm just the messenger here so I'm just sticking to the facts but I don't see why the kids need a big house to live in to feel loved, its not like they would be out on the street, there is a couple of hundred k in equity to share out, he is willing to go 50/50 even though she has never financially contributed.
He's going to be in for a rude awakening with that mindset when it goes legal.There are far too many variables here (length of relationship, age of kids, ability to earn, house equity, etc etc) that I would suggest you aren't really going to get any really detailed advice here, however:
1) Tell him do not, under any circumstances, stop paying the mortgage. Not just for his own credit rating but also for the relationship with his children and any possibility of keeping things amicable with his ex partner.
2) See legal advice from a family law solicitor asap, most solicitors offer a free 30 minute consultation. Can pretty much guarantee she'll be do the same at some point.
3) This website https://divorce.wikivorce.com/ is really useful and full of information which can give him some idea of options and processes
Edited to add: if it does ever reach the court stage, the needs of the kids will always be first (and quite rightly so)
1) Tell him do not, under any circumstances, stop paying the mortgage. Not just for his own credit rating but also for the relationship with his children and any possibility of keeping things amicable with his ex partner.
2) See legal advice from a family law solicitor asap, most solicitors offer a free 30 minute consultation. Can pretty much guarantee she'll be do the same at some point.
3) This website https://divorce.wikivorce.com/ is really useful and full of information which can give him some idea of options and processes
Edited to add: if it does ever reach the court stage, the needs of the kids will always be first (and quite rightly so)
CMTMB said:
richhead said:
I speak from bitter experience, never never never move out of a house you have paid for and leave the soon to be ex and kids there.
This.Moving out was a massive mistake.
I separated many years ago from my ex but we co-owned the house albeit not evenly and fortunately in the deeds it was established I owned 2/3. She opted to move out and I bought her out of the place as she knew she couldn't maintain it on her own and fortunately had help from her family.
I never stitched her up despite her moving out but genuinely wondered what the implications are for the OP's mate.
Alex_225 said:
Totally genuine question but why?
I separated many years ago from my ex but we co-owned the house albeit not evenly and fortunately in the deeds it was established I owned 2/3. She opted to move out and I bought her out of the place as she knew she couldn't maintain it on her own and fortunately had help from her family.
I never stitched her up despite her moving out but genuinely wondered what the implications are for the OP's mate.
He's now got nowhere to live and still has to pay for the old place.I separated many years ago from my ex but we co-owned the house albeit not evenly and fortunately in the deeds it was established I owned 2/3. She opted to move out and I bought her out of the place as she knew she couldn't maintain it on her own and fortunately had help from her family.
I never stitched her up despite her moving out but genuinely wondered what the implications are for the OP's mate.
If the person living in the original house decides they don't want to move it could turn out to a long and painful process
I did tell him not to move out in the first place but he said he was miserable there, I think it was from a lack of interest from his missus in anything he did, he was ambitious, she just wanted to plod along. I said he should just put up with it and if you decide to have kids then you have effectively cancelled your right to a life but the consensus amongst his other friends was he deserved a happy life too. It will be at least 7 years from now before both kids are 18, what happens then, I presume she can still refuse to sell.
There is no way he can afford to buy another house whilst paying for this one, can he charge her rent on the other 50% of the house or do you both own everything jointly. If you buy a house on a shared ownership you have to pay 50% rent as well as 50% mortgage.
So back to my original point, it looks to me that she will be in the house for at least six or seven years and he will have to pay the mortgage up until then, meaning he cant buy anywhere else. If he stops paying the mortgage and it gets repossessed then he will have bad credit for 6 years so only in the same boat really, but he should get some equity back, maybe not as much as if they sold it properly but he should be better off by far (7 years worth of mortgage payments plus equity).
Surely that situation should be enough to focus the mind of the ex. she can walk away now with nearly £100k or maybe get £30 or £40k if its repo'd if she is lucky. I think that's the way I would do it or at least threaten to do it.
There is no way he can afford to buy another house whilst paying for this one, can he charge her rent on the other 50% of the house or do you both own everything jointly. If you buy a house on a shared ownership you have to pay 50% rent as well as 50% mortgage.
So back to my original point, it looks to me that she will be in the house for at least six or seven years and he will have to pay the mortgage up until then, meaning he cant buy anywhere else. If he stops paying the mortgage and it gets repossessed then he will have bad credit for 6 years so only in the same boat really, but he should get some equity back, maybe not as much as if they sold it properly but he should be better off by far (7 years worth of mortgage payments plus equity).
Surely that situation should be enough to focus the mind of the ex. she can walk away now with nearly £100k or maybe get £30 or £40k if its repo'd if she is lucky. I think that's the way I would do it or at least threaten to do it.
Whilst her name is on the Deeds and the Mortgage, she legally owns 1/2 that house, including any equity, regardless of whether she's actually paid any of the Mortgage.
A court will say that whilst your mate earn't the money to pay the mortgage, she sacrificed a career to bring up his kids.....
I very much doubt that, if she doesn't want to move out, there's anything he can do about it, at least until the Kids are out of full time education. And even then she's still on the deeds.... so you'll have to come to an amicable solution.
The court is going to make him pay child maintenance, he won't probably have to pay her any spousal maintenance.
Not a legal expert, Just someone who went through a divorce with kids at the same age, so see a Solicitor. Only difference for me was that I could pay my own way, and the child maintenance, and I did move out.
A court will say that whilst your mate earn't the money to pay the mortgage, she sacrificed a career to bring up his kids.....
I very much doubt that, if she doesn't want to move out, there's anything he can do about it, at least until the Kids are out of full time education. And even then she's still on the deeds.... so you'll have to come to an amicable solution.
The court is going to make him pay child maintenance, he won't probably have to pay her any spousal maintenance.
Not a legal expert, Just someone who went through a divorce with kids at the same age, so see a Solicitor. Only difference for me was that I could pay my own way, and the child maintenance, and I did move out.
DaveyBoyWonder said:
richhead said:
I speak from bitter experience, never never never move out of a house you have paid for and leave the soon to be ex and kids there.
This. Luckily I've never been in this situation but the advice always seems to be never move out of the house.Gassing Station | The Lounge | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff


