Promotion at any cost?
Promotion at any cost?
Author
Discussion

BoRED S2upid

Original Poster:

20,817 posts

258 months

Wednesday 15th April 2009
quotequote all
Ive been in this job for years and the only way up the ladder seems to be wait until the fatman who 'manages' me leaves and then take his job.

The way I see it is that this could be sooner than anyone expects if he keeps eating like he is doing. So the question is, should I be bringing in cakes every week and helping myself gain promotion or is that imoral?.

I just offered sloth a plum he looked at it as if it was a foreign object. He obviously ate it but thats not going to help me gain promotion.

Mods please don't move this to Jobs and employment things forum, nobody reads that forum.

Steamer

14,066 posts

231 months

Wednesday 15th April 2009
quotequote all
BoRED S2upid said:
I just offered... plum, he looked at it...
If you chose to offer your plumbs to your superiors, well thats your choice!

shirt

24,544 posts

219 months

Wednesday 15th April 2009
quotequote all
watch the film 'the young poisoner's handbook'. make notes, adapt accordingly, sit & wait.

Sheets Tabuer

20,476 posts

233 months

Wednesday 15th April 2009
quotequote all
Sausages are a heart attack waiting to happen, buy him a cheap & nasty sammich daily.

Or offer your arse as well as your plums.

BoRED S2upid

Original Poster:

20,817 posts

258 months

Wednesday 15th April 2009
quotequote all
If say he did happen to have a massive heart attack and me promotion. I can't get done for feeding him creamcakes can I?.

M3CHA-MONK3Y

6,095 posts

213 months

Wednesday 15th April 2009
quotequote all
It's only wafer thin.



308mate

13,758 posts

240 months

Wednesday 15th April 2009
quotequote all
Cakes are getting remarkably less fattening Im finding. Try just about ANYTHING from the sandwich fridge of a motorway services though. Ideally you want 25grams+ of saturated fat for every 100g.

Get the boys in IT to scan his PC for porn. Then report it.

Or put a dildo in a secret santa* and give it to the office hottie, claiming it was from him. HR will do the rest.




* This plan will take approx 8 months to implement.

anonymous-user

72 months

Wednesday 15th April 2009
quotequote all
It'll take years to kill him by feeding him stuff, unless it's poison.

You need to try and get him on a marathon or the great north run, loads of fatties die on those.

BoRED S2upid

Original Poster:

20,817 posts

258 months

Wednesday 15th April 2009
quotequote all
el stovey said:
It'll take years to kill him by feeding him stuff, unless it's poison.

You need to try and get him on a marathon or the great north run, loads of fatties die on those.
Oh I like that idea. Work has just signed up to this cycle to work scheme where the government gives us 50% off the bike. Obviously he won't be getting one but I could and encourage him to use it. hmm. Got me thinking now. Charity bikeride or something. As well as a ginsters training diet.

Stig

11,823 posts

302 months

Wednesday 15th April 2009
quotequote all
BoRED S2upid said:
Ive been in this job for years and the only way up the ladder seems to be wait until the fatman who 'manages' me leaves and then take his job.
..or to stop wasting most of the day surfing PH wink

EDLT

15,421 posts

224 months

Wednesday 15th April 2009
quotequote all
Buy him a Mcdonalds meal every day, it nearly killed that Supersize Me bloke.

Jasandjules

71,409 posts

247 months

Wednesday 15th April 2009
quotequote all
Steamer said:
BoRED S2upid said:
I just offered... plum, he looked at it...
If you chose to offer your plumbs to your superiors, well thats your choice!
It could lead to a promotion, under the right circumstances.

Cara Van Man

29,977 posts

269 months

Wednesday 15th April 2009
quotequote all
BoRED S2upid said:
Ive been in this job for years and the only way up the ladder seems to be wait until the fatman who 'manages' me leaves and then take his job.

The way I see it is that this could be sooner than anyone expects if he keeps eating like he is doing. So the question is, should I be bringing in cakes every week and helping myself gain promotion or is that imoral?.

I just offered sloth a plum he looked at it as if it was a foreign object. He obviously ate it but thats not going to help me gain promotion.

Mods please don't move this to Jobs and employment things forum, nobody reads that forum.
Leave the occasional croissant laying around, maybe even the odd tray of homemade fudge.

You'll be up the promotion ladder quicker than you can say "The fat man keeled over grasping his chest and went blue"

Mattt

16,664 posts

236 months

Wednesday 15th April 2009
quotequote all
I thought you ran a pub?

BoRED S2upid

Original Poster:

20,817 posts

258 months

Wednesday 15th April 2009
quotequote all
Mattt said:
I thought you ran a pub?
You get hobby and work mixed up. I own a pub but also have a 9-5.

911motorsport

7,251 posts

251 months

Wednesday 15th April 2009
quotequote all
EDLT said:
Buy him a Mcdonalds meal every day, it nearly killed that Supersize Me bloke.