Man Jobs
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Discussion

Cactussed

Original Poster:

5,351 posts

234 months

Wednesday 3rd June 2009
quotequote all
What's the official list? So far I have:

BBQ - all aspects
Taking out garbage
Killing spiders / bugs etc
Opening jars
Opening doors
Servicing / fixing the car / other mechanical items
Operating remote control
Sharpening kitchen knives
Smashing back doors in

Am I missing anything obvious?

okgo

41,313 posts

219 months

Wednesday 3rd June 2009
quotequote all
Tree removal.

Cara Van Man

29,977 posts

272 months

Wednesday 3rd June 2009
quotequote all
Cactussed said:
Am I missing anything obvious?
eeeer, yeah!

Stirring paint.
Decorating badly.
Washing the car.
Cutting tiles with a totally inappropriate tool.
Shed based activities.

stifler

37,069 posts

209 months

Wednesday 3rd June 2009
quotequote all
Driving driving

adam85

1,264 posts

212 months

Wednesday 3rd June 2009
quotequote all
With reference to the BBQ:

Routine...
(1) The woman buys the food.
(2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert.
(3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand.
(4) The woman remains outside the compulsory three meter exclusion zone where the exuberance of testosterone and other manly bonding activities can take place without the interference of the woman.


Here comes the important part:


(5) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.


More routine...


(6) The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.
(7) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is looking great. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he flips the meat



Important again:


(8) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.


More routine...
(9) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces, and brings them to the table.
(10) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.


And most important of all:



(11) Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.
(12) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed ' her night off ',and, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some women.




patmahe

5,899 posts

225 months

Wednesday 3rd June 2009
quotequote all
Digging stuff up, garden etc...
Mowing Lawn.

ETA: Heavy lifting, while the Wife/Girlfriend, tells him to mind his back and then can't decide where she wants the incredibly heavy item placed.

Edited by patmahe on Wednesday 3rd June 12:49

SkinnyBoy

4,635 posts

279 months

Wednesday 3rd June 2009
quotequote all
Cactussed said:
What's the official list? So far I have:

BBQ - all aspects
Taking out garbage
Killing spiders / bugs etc
Opening jars
Opening doors
Servicing / fixing the car / other mechanical items
Operating remote control
Sharpening kitchen knives
Smashing back doors in

Am I missing anything obvious?
Purveyor of interesting factoids, relevant to ANY conversation.

Festive bird carving.

Matt_N

8,986 posts

223 months

Wednesday 3rd June 2009
quotequote all
Going up into the loft
Finding things in the shed / garage

rhinochopig

17,932 posts

219 months

Wednesday 3rd June 2009
quotequote all
Naked wrestling


MentalSarcasm

6,083 posts

232 months

Wednesday 3rd June 2009
quotequote all
rhinochopig said:
Naked wrestling

The guy in front looks like Jesus XD

shirt

24,953 posts

222 months

Wednesday 3rd June 2009
quotequote all
you forgot:

anything that requires action with a modicum of urgency

bob1179

14,126 posts

230 months

Wednesday 3rd June 2009
quotequote all
Using incorrect tools to carry out jobs with.

Camoradi

4,779 posts

277 months

Wednesday 3rd June 2009
quotequote all
Being right

AndyAudi

3,683 posts

243 months

Wednesday 3rd June 2009
quotequote all
Burying Family Pets

aclivity

4,072 posts

209 months

Wednesday 3rd June 2009
quotequote all
ANYTHING that requires power tools. A blender is not often a power tool, but if ice cubes are to be blended it can be given temporary power tool status.

A Hoover is NEVER a power tool. Even a Dyson Boll.

Lawnmowers are sometimes not power tools - particularly any that is marketed as "lightweight". Lawnmowers with chairs and steering wheels are ALWAYS power tools.


FTJoe

237 posts

203 months

Wednesday 3rd June 2009
quotequote all
Mashing potato, probably falls under general tool use, but I find many women are too weak to mash potatoes effectively.
Destroying wasps nests and killing dogs - see recent threads on both
Blowing up air beds
Putting up tents

Republik

4,525 posts

211 months

Wednesday 3rd June 2009
quotequote all
Cara Van Man said:
Washing the car.
nono There are some exceptions


Cara Van Man

29,977 posts

272 months

Wednesday 3rd June 2009
quotequote all
Republik said:
Cara Van Man said:
Washing the car.
nono There are some exceptions

I've just provided the foam.

SkinnyBoy

4,635 posts

279 months

Wednesday 3rd June 2009
quotequote all
Anything involving being more than a persons height above said person, be it putting in a lightbulb (she hates to cook my tea in the dark) or perhaps coaxing the cat/gerbil/frisbee from its prison up on high. Ladders should be missing a rung or two and be made of some wood that looks like it came from the Mary Rose for added hero effect.

JazD

284 posts

209 months

Wednesday 3rd June 2009
quotequote all
adam85 said:
With reference to the BBQ:

Routine...
(1) The woman buys the food.
(2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert.
(3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand.
(4) The woman remains outside the compulsory three meter exclusion zone where the exuberance of testosterone and other manly bonding activities can take place without the interference of the woman.


Here comes the important part:


(5) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.


More routine...


(6) The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.
(7) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is looking great. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he flips the meat



Important again:


(8) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.


More routine...
(9) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces, and brings them to the table.
(10) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.


And most important of all:



(11) Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.
(12) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed ' her night off ',and, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some women.
You forgot the all important:

MAN SPENDS 1-2 HOURS MAKING SURE BARBECUE IS LIT AND AT CORRECT TEMPERATURE WHILE DRINKING BEER