Compulsive Liars
Author
Discussion

Eddh

Original Poster:

4,656 posts

215 months

Thursday 16th July 2009
quotequote all
I was just wondering if anyone else had a friend who is a compulsive liar?

One of my best mates is and some of the stuff he comes out with is absurd. Today I was messing about on Facebook (I know, I know I’m going to hell) and noticed he has updated his Facebook status to read ‘has just found an undated 20p that is worth about £50’. I think to myself oh fks sake here we go again… A few people had commented on it, one saying ‘someone sold one on eBay recently for £6,000’. I then commented saying something along the lines of ‘Pics or GTFO’ at which point he said he had given it to his mum so he couldn’t… I mean come on… A few of us then set our status’s taking the piss and he got really arsey.

Some other classics include:

‘My dad owns Ford’

‘My mums had a stroke and can’t remember my name’
His mum to me the next day (at his house): ‘Oh hello Eddh, are you looking for Scott (name changed)’

‘I got on so and so last night’
After numerous threats to phone so and so it turned out she gave him a hug at the end of a night out.

‘Yeah… I smuggle guns from the docks into town’ (to a girl as a chat up line)

‘I went to the clinic today with this girl… turns out I have got her pregnant’
We knew for 100% fact he had been at home all day and the girl in question didn’t actually exist.

Does anyone else know anyone like this?

Los Palmas 7

29,908 posts

253 months

Thursday 16th July 2009
quotequote all
Eddh said:
‘My dad owns Ford’
Not much of a boast, is it?

TheD

3,142 posts

222 months

Thursday 16th July 2009
quotequote all
Loads....I don't have much time for liars but I find compulsive liars funny as feck, as it's like their hobby. I know a few and they make for a great laugh (at their expense)

Dixie68

3,091 posts

210 months

Thursday 16th July 2009
quotequote all
Eddh said:
‘Yeah… I smuggle guns from the docks into town’ (to a girl as a chat up line)
This one doesn't count

Eddh

Original Poster:

4,656 posts

215 months

Thursday 16th July 2009
quotequote all
Los Palmas 7 said:
Eddh said:
‘My dad owns Ford’
Not much of a boast, is it?
To be fair it was back in school when we were around 15 so about 5 years ago.

Eddh

Original Poster:

4,656 posts

215 months

Thursday 16th July 2009
quotequote all
TheD said:
Loads....I don't have much time for liars but I find compulsive liars funny as feck, as it's like their hobby. I know a few and they make for a great laugh (at their expense)
It is very amusing waiting to see what they are going to come up with next.

him_over_there

970 posts

229 months

Thursday 16th July 2009
quotequote all
How do we know you are telling the truth.

shakotan

10,858 posts

219 months

Thursday 16th July 2009
quotequote all
Eddh said:
TheD said:
Loads....I don't have much time for liars but I find compulsive liars funny as feck, as it's like their hobby. I know a few and they make for a great laugh (at their expense)
It is very amusing waiting to see what they are going to come up with next.
I met a friend of a friend who has "been there, done that" at every subject you could ever mention.

During any conversation, he's done it bigger/better/faster/longer than anyone else.

Told him I'm into modified older cars, he tells me he's build a stock Capri with a stock Rover V8 that would do 140mph...

Told him my mate does off-roading in a Frontera, he tells me he used to have a Discovery, and Fronteras are st at offroading cos the side windows fall out...

FFS!

GingerWizard

4,721 posts

221 months

Thursday 16th July 2009
quotequote all

Some bloke at work....
" Yeah at home i've got a Browning HP and about 8k rounds of ammo, from hollow points to home made cynaide tipped ones, i take it out with me when i walk the dog at night"

me

"I know your having a laugh, but nice one..."

Him

"seriously i have my old man was in the Iraq wars and bought them back as well as a Tiger Landrover that the army forgot they had..."

Me

" Don't bull st me buddy i'm not impressed, BTW my father is a fire arms officer and my brother is a copper, so who do you want me to tell first?"

Him

" well my address is not listed and i am covered by the official secrets act so they can't do anything"

Me

(half hour later)

" so you live at 46 **** ****, i know this because i have just had a word with my father and he tells me he knows your old man quiet well, he was in the catering dept of the army and the closest he ever got to Iraq was Dover, being partially disabled he thought it best not to go to war to make curry"

Him

  • starts to cry*

I mean come on!? If someone told you they had a hand gun and a plethora of deadly munitions for the gun would you just go , Really, thats nice...."

Dick

discoman

237 posts

213 months

Thursday 16th July 2009
quotequote all
I have quite a few bullstting friends that I meet now and then and I tend to switch of and just nod my head hehe

The funniest stories I have ever heard though were my dad owns a skyscraper in Dubai and he also owns a Nissan Skyline Gtr (funny how I saw him driving a VW Golf!!)

He spoke so much rubbish his nickname had the word bullst incorporated into the end of it!

MacGee

2,513 posts

253 months

Thursday 16th July 2009
quotequote all
I never lie....

have a few frineds who tell tall stories of being fighter pilots and Everest mountaineers...bit like that old Heinz soup adverts..

Alex

9,978 posts

307 months

Thursday 16th July 2009
quotequote all
Did you hear about the guy who said he was going to buy a Gallardo for his wife as an anniversary present?

hehe

Carfiend

3,186 posts

232 months

Thursday 16th July 2009
quotequote all
I am a liar but nobody believes me.

nick s

1,372 posts

240 months

Thursday 16th July 2009
quotequote all
i know a few people like it's actually fun to try and provoke stories from them, pure entertainement. Some of the lies they tell are actually outrageous, completely absurdly outrageous. the best i've ever heard though was the day after we'd all been down the pub, it turns out this guy upon walking home and leaving us the night before, that this guy (Dave) had been approached by two burly men demanding his phone and wallet, so he punched one so hard in the face, that the other one st himself and ran off. The whole incident was apparantly seen by a police woman passing in her squad car, who stopped and offered him a lift home. He accepted, but on the way she kept commenting how sexy he was and decided to take him to a local carpark for a shag. They got there, (bear in mind he's saying they are in a marked police car with a uniformed police woman) and they start shagging, there's loads of people in the car park, and he accidentally knock the blues and twos and sirens on the car on and everyone looks. Anyway, he made up a whole affair with her, until one night we made him invite "her" to the pub, he said she was coming all day etc, then 10 minutes before he was die to arrive he got a text calling the whole affair off! amazing fabrication.

That is just one of many gems he's provided, including telling us that he taught elton john how to drift around reading in a pink S2000 which was apparantly Eltons BF, as Dave worked at Honda and had been servicing it. It's so much fun listening to it all.

Zod

35,295 posts

281 months

Thursday 16th July 2009
quotequote all
Eddh said:
I was just wondering if anyone else had a friend who is a compulsive liar?

One of my best mates is and some of the stuff he comes out with is absurd. Today I was messing about on Facebook (I know, I know I’m going to hell) and noticed he has updated his Facebook status to read ‘has just found an undated 20p that is worth about £50’. I think to myself oh fks sake here we go again… A few people had commented on it, one saying ‘someone sold one on eBay recently for £6,000’. I then commented saying something along the lines of ‘Pics or GTFO’ at which point he said he had given it to his mum so he couldn’t… I mean come on… A few of us then set our status’s taking the piss and he got really arsey.

Some other classics include:

‘My dad owns Ford’

‘My mums had a stroke and can’t remember my name’
His mum to me the next day (at his house): ‘Oh hello Eddh, are you looking for Scott (name changed)’

‘I got on so and so last night’
After numerous threats to phone so and so it turned out she gave him a hug at the end of a night out.

‘Yeah… I smuggle guns from the docks into town’ (to a girl as a chat up line)

‘I went to the clinic today with this girl… turns out I have got her pregnant’
We knew for 100% fact he had been at home all day and the girl in question didn’t actually exist.

Does anyone else know anyone like this?
Are you 13?

Famous Graham

26,553 posts

248 months

Thursday 16th July 2009
quotequote all
shakotan said:
Eddh said:
TheD said:
Loads....I don't have much time for liars but I find compulsive liars funny as feck, as it's like their hobby. I know a few and they make for a great laugh (at their expense)
It is very amusing waiting to see what they are going to come up with next.
I met a friend of a friend who has "been there, done that" at every subject you could ever mention.

During any conversation, he's done it bigger/better/faster/longer than anyone else.

Told him I'm into modified older cars, he tells me he's build a stock Capri with a stock Rover V8 that would do 140mph...

Told him my mate does off-roading in a Frontera, he tells me he used to have a Discovery, and Fronteras are st at offroading cos the side windows fall out...

FFS!
An Eleventyrife

WorAl

10,877 posts

211 months

Thursday 16th July 2009
quotequote all
my cousin was one (dead now, god rest his soul) but he knew he was and just laughed about the st he was spurting out. he was funny as feck with it.

dont like people who lie to hurt you though.

sleep envy

62,260 posts

272 months

Thursday 16th July 2009
quotequote all
Famous Graham said:
An Eleventyrife
yes

there's one at every work place/pub

Dixie68

3,091 posts

210 months

Thursday 16th July 2009
quotequote all
shakotan said:
I met a friend of a friend who has "been there, done that" at every subject you could ever mention.

During any conversation, he's done it bigger/better/faster/longer than anyone else.
They used to get the nickname "two-sh!ts" in the mob - if you'd had one sh!t they'd say they'd had two

GingerWizard

4,721 posts

221 months

Thursday 16th July 2009
quotequote all
Dixie68 said:
shakotan said:
I met a friend of a friend who has "been there, done that" at every subject you could ever mention.

During any conversation, he's done it bigger/better/faster/longer than anyone else.
They used to get the nickname "two-sh!ts" in the mob - if you'd had one sh!t they'd say they'd had two
The bloke i mentioned above is also called elevena-reef. Cos if you've been to tenna reef then he...... (i know thats not how you spell the bloody place....)