Saturday night, club adventures in kingston..

[davido140]

fk me, Nightclubs... they're worse than I remember!

Got dragged along with the misses mates to "Oceana" in Kingston, didnt get as far as seeing any more than the entrance hall, I got forcibly removed by a man-ape-hybrid (I think they are called bouncers) because I was wearing (IMO a rather natty) pair of trainers, which were frankly a lot smarter than the £10 matalan loafers worn by all the other smaller man-ape things that frequented the club.

Queue arguments with several doormen about refunds for the seven of us, eventually get our money back and move on to somewhere else called smiffys, or spunkys, or corkies down by the river. quieter end of town, I thinking a bar with decking, tables and patio heaters along side the river for some late night drinking.

Oh dear.... Metal detectors, security fences and more hi-vis wearing man-ape-things, both big and small.

I heard a song called "birthday sex" WTF is that all about, also one which seemed to have borrowed its lyrics from a childrens song, "heads shoulders, knees and toes", I was dissapointed they didnt play the hokey-kokey afterwards as I like a bit of left leg in, left leg out...

As far as I could make out, the main reason to go to this place was to bounce around the dancefloor randomly feeling up members of the opposite sex with the vain hope of copping off with swamp donkey.

Sorry for the dull thread, I'm just all a bit dazed and confused today.

Edited by davido140 on Sunday 11th October 12:57

[Technonotice]

next time go to revolutions in sutton. Much rougher place but no metal detectors, they don't mind trainers and there are wall to wall fit slags.

Re Kingston: The queue into oceana is ridiculous sometimes, i don't know why since its a sthole.

Edited by Technonotice on Sunday 11th October 13:09

[davido140]

Technonotice said:

Much rougher place but no metal detectors,

Thats doesnt strike me as a good thing....

[okgo]

Kingston is not a town for going clubbing in. And by the sounds of it you picked the worst two places there is in town to visit. I am assuming the second place was Mcluskeys?


I have lived here 3 years, and been to oceana once, seeing as I am 21 that goes some way to telling you my thoughts on the hole.

[Technonotice]

davido140 said:

Technonotice said:

Much rougher place but no metal detectors,

Thats doesnt strike me as a good thing....

I was expecting it do be quite rough but everyone who I talked to was alight. No nasty vibes or anything.

And there were quite a lot more women than men, which is a rarity.

Edited by Technonotice on Sunday 11th October 23:05

[Ian974]

There's crap places everywhere. Got up today wondering why I even bothered going out last night.
The idiots were out in suprising force too! was stuck waiting at a bar behind someone who hadn't enough cash with him to buy a pint and wanted to switch the last 40p. Hats off too for the guy who dumped down a handful of pound coins and asked 'what can I get for this?'

[BrabusMog]

I did have to chuckle at a bouncer in Camberley when I was denied entry to their Luminar-esque night club called Envy (I have been reliably informed it is now knows as "Tru").

I was denied entry to the club as I was wearing trainers and sports wear is not allowed. Fair enough, but these weren't day-glo Nike Air Max TN or anything like that. The offending articles were, in actual fact, a pair of Paul Smiths which actually looked like shoes. When stepping out from the club, three chavvy looking types were let in in badly fitted and frayed jeans, those stupid shirts that have buttons to hold the rolled sleeves up and all of them were in scuffed, manky loafers.

I turned round to the bouncer and asked why these three who looked like they had dunked their heads in a tub of wet-look hair gel were allowed entry and I wasn't, seeing as I was far more presentable than they were. "They've got shoes on though, you are in trainers." That was the last time I attempted clubbing in a provincial town.

[Slagathore]

BrabusMog said:

I did have to chuckle at a bouncer in Camberley when I was denied entry to their Luminar-esque night club called Envy (I have been reliably informed it is now knows as "Tru").

I was denied entry to the club as I was wearing trainers and sports wear is not allowed. Fair enough, but these weren't day-glo Nike Air Max TN or anything like that. The offending articles were, in actual fact, a pair of Paul Smiths which actually looked like shoes. When stepping out from the club, three chavvy looking types were let in in badly fitted and frayed jeans, those stupid shirts that have buttons to hold the rolled sleeves up and all of them were in scuffed, manky loafers.

I turned round to the bouncer and asked why these three who looked like they had dunked their heads in a tub of wet-look hair gel were allowed entry and I wasn't, seeing as I was far more presentable than they were. "They've got shoes on though, you are in trainers." That was the last time I attempted clubbing in a provincial town.

You wanna try it in Liverpool. Was nearly a year ago now, went up for the weekend.

Went to a concert on the saturday night, so I was wearing my trainers.

Sister and her boyfriend went in to a place as me and my my brother went to draw some money out. They let my sister's boyfriend in with trainers (dark brown Adidas Superstars), but wouldn't let me in with my trainers on, admittedly, they where fairly new and still bright white.

The bouncer was actually quite honest, though. Saying the place was a sthole and full of rats

We did point out that my sister's boyfriend was wearing trainers when they got out, he just said they were dark so he didn't notice.

You can usually get away with trainers on a Friday in Bristol, need shoes for Satuday. Well, that's onyl if you go to the bigger clubs, the smaller clubs/bar places aren't as strict.

[escargot]

It wouldn't enter my head to go on a night out wearing trainers.

[fido]

okgo said:

McSlutskeys?

EFA .. as teenagers on the train refer to it. Kingston seems like a pretty pointless place to go out these days. I've never been in a restaurant where people turn up with their ASDAs shopping and finest white trainers. Being a 'student town' it has a decent amount of eye-candy (if you like this sort of thing) but it appears as if Kingston geezers don't so much as 'grow on trees' as they do 'swing from trees'. The one next to Rotunda is okay i suppose, but the smaller ones near the Marketplace (Baccus?) seem to attract the less brain-dead specimens of that genus.

Edited by fido on Sunday 11th October 14:54

[Ian974]

It does strike me as odd that in most clubs you can go in wearing pretty much anything you want, as long as you wear shoes.
And I'm another one who hates the rolled up sleeves! If you want a short sleeve shirt, buy one!

[okgo]

fido said:

okgo said:

McSlutskeys?

EFA .. as teenagers on the train refer to it. Kingston seems like a pretty pointless place to go out these days. I've never been in a restaurant where people turn up with their ASDAs shopping and finest white trainers. Being a 'student town' it has a decent amount of eye-candy (if you like this sort of thing) but it appears as if Kingston geezers don't so much as 'grow on trees' as they do 'swing from trees'. The one next to Rotunda is okay i suppose, but the smaller ones near the Marketplace (Baccus?) seem to attract the less brain-dead specimens of that genus.

Edited by fido on Sunday 11th October 14:54

Its a crap town, full of wkers, and students. Its far far up its own ass, with bouncers on EVERY door, and charging london prices for drinks.

I don't go there anymore, I favour a quiet pint in the local, or if I want a proper night out just go into London, or have people over to my flat.

Bacchus is ok, full of emo types though, that look a mess, and the women in there are similar. Also the bouncers there are cocks, and I am banned for life for having an altercation with one after they went way OTT on some poor bloke. Horrid little sthole.

[shakotan]

It does have a delightful vegetarian restaurant though - The Riverside Vegetaria - just down past Wagamama. Very small, run by a Jamaican gentleman IIRC.

The food is divine and very reasonable.

[playerone]

Number one rule. Dont go to a place with a dress code. If they need to tell their clientele how to dress then you dont want to go there.

[drivin_me_nuts]

playerone said:

Number one rule. Dont go to a place with a dress code. If they need to tell their clientele how to dress then you dont want to go there.

good advice

<goes off to find address for nudist camp ...>

[JulianHJ]

Is there a Tru and Oceana in quite a few towns then? Are they some sort of franchise? I ask as Brighton's two largest stholes bear the same names...

[okgo]

JulianHJ said:

Is there a Tru and Oceana in quite a few towns then? Are they some sort of franchise? I ask as Brighton's two largest stholes bear the same names...

They are both franchises.

And needless to say, ste.

[MynameisRob]

Get yourself in the Kings Tunn (imaginatively named i know) opposite Oceana, it'a awesome.

As advertised on crimewatch ...

[NerveAgent]

escargot said:

It wouldn't enter my head to go on a night out wearing trainers.

I always go out wearing trainers when clubbing, its only the rough places that wont let you in.

Different story if going to nice bars though.

[fido]

MynameisRob said:

Get yourself in the Kings Tunn (imaginatively named i know) opposite Oceana, it'a awesome.

We used to say it in a jamaican accent when were kids like .. ah memories. The only really good time i've had in Kingston was in that Blue Hawaii restaurant, or whatever it's called, where you have to mix your own food and entertained by a bad Elvis impersonator. More so, because a couple of tarts walked past and flashed their boobs against the window next to our table.