Red elastic bands - postman

[parakitaMol.]

The delinquent postman drops at least 2 elastic bands (that they use to bundle the post) on the drive each week. It seems trivial but it's becoming rather irksome now. The cats chew on them too. Not good!

I am collecting them to create a life sized voodoo doll of him. I have already finished the head.



It will, over the weekend be fashioned into this type of arrangement. Which I will present to him nailed to the front door with a chirpy Christmas message attached, reading "this is you. you ".

[pkitchen]

parakitaMol. said:

The delinquent postman drops at least 2 elastic bands (that they use to bundle the post) on the drive each week. It seems trivial but it's becoming rather irksome now. The cats chew on them too. Not good!

I am collecting them to create a life sized voodoo doll of him. I have already finished the head.



It will, over the weekend be fashioned into this type of arrangement. Which I will present to him nailed to the front door with a chirpy Christmas message attached, reading "this is you. you ".

Bang on. We have the same bloody problem. Total waste of time. Stick em in your
bag not on my drive you tt

[NDA]

Creating a voodoo doll of your postman seems an unwise strategy at this time of year.

You would be better advised to wait until the early spring and make a blood sacrifice of his first born to ensure that his crops will fail. This way his family will starve. This has the added bonus of ensuring the the safe delivery of your Christmas items.

Just a thought.

[parakitaMol.]

Yes. Valid point.

I shall work on my elastic band message to include a sub text about failure to deliver post as retribution for heart-attack or even death.

P.S. Kitchen - you've messed up your quote. Sort it out you Joey.

[RicksAlfas]

parakitaMol. said:

you Joey.

[FraserLFA]

If you still want to use the "Head" just lob it at him. That thing'll bounce right back for hours of fun!

[sleep envy]

fashion them into a garrote and place them across the drive or even collect them and when he knocks on the door at xmas for a tip you can return them all to him

[thegman]

Mine does this as well - pisses me off. Can follow his little trail of rubber bands - dirty bugger. I want to stick a note on my door but the wife says I am like Victor Meldrew

[Raify]

Careful! If you use the voodoo doll, he'll sue you for a hurty back + missing a golf game.

[BliarOut]

And you said I'm weird...

[sleep envy]

lost your glasses?

[BliarOut]

Who said that?

[Bill]

At least they're red. That way when the cat craps them out you won't think they're worms.

[GregE240]

LOL

Our old postie did exactly the same thing, and we gave him an almost identical ball of them back, asking him politely not to do it again.

None of his family were harmed.

[off_again]

Funny thing is that one of my neighbours is a postie. He doesn't do his own street, but when the postie that does started dropping the laggy bands, he had a quiet word. Never happened since!

Just had a parcel delivery though - UPS. Current estimates are that the Royal Mail has lost 30% of its business in the run up to this Christmas due to the strikes. What with laggy bands, loss of business and getting sued by posties for random injuries - I cant see the Royal Mail lasting much longer. Next big business to crash?

[f-fuxake]

Isn't it LAZZY bands?

[Neil H]

Careful now, he might sue you for mental distress or some equally trivial bks.

[LadyB]

Raify said:

Careful! If you use the voodoo doll, he'll sue you for a hurty back + missing a golf game.

[AtWork]

Lacky bands, shirley?

[tegwin]

We quite often have these things dotted all over the drive....

Firstly, they should be re-using them... reduce their carbon footprint and all that jizz..


And secondly, they should NOT be littering... it is an offence....