Discussion
OK could do with some help regarding this one.
I'm 26 (male, if you didn't know) and my OH is 35 (female, obviously or I wouldn't be on such a hetero site
)
OK we've been together a while now and we are wanting to move away from where we live and set up our lives else where, however, our plans along the line is to have kids together at some point.
Now im not 100% ready yet but she is worrying about the age thing, obviously being 35 makes it a bit harder to have kids.
She is worrying that if we leave it too long she wont be able to have them, but obviously me not being 100% committed isn't exactly ideal for any kid to come into this life.
Another point is that, if we do have a child now, then it might destroy some of our other dreams.
Now we have talked last year and we said that this year we should get her pregnant. Now this year has come around, we have both got cold feet, realising that im not ready, she isn't really and we don't want to compromise any dreams, but then she is scared incase we leave it too late and she can't have kids.
What to do? anyone have any advice, all comments welcome as funny ones will cheer my day up, but please try to have some good advice in there too.
I'm 26 (male, if you didn't know) and my OH is 35 (female, obviously or I wouldn't be on such a hetero site
)OK we've been together a while now and we are wanting to move away from where we live and set up our lives else where, however, our plans along the line is to have kids together at some point.
Now im not 100% ready yet but she is worrying about the age thing, obviously being 35 makes it a bit harder to have kids.
She is worrying that if we leave it too long she wont be able to have them, but obviously me not being 100% committed isn't exactly ideal for any kid to come into this life.
Another point is that, if we do have a child now, then it might destroy some of our other dreams.
Now we have talked last year and we said that this year we should get her pregnant. Now this year has come around, we have both got cold feet, realising that im not ready, she isn't really and we don't want to compromise any dreams, but then she is scared incase we leave it too late and she can't have kids.
What to do? anyone have any advice, all comments welcome as funny ones will cheer my day up, but please try to have some good advice in there too.
elster said:
Penny-lope said:
She comes off the pill, and if it happens it happens....you can still have dreams even when you have kids you know 
Don't lie, everyone knows your life as you know it ends.But your advice is how it should be really.
Edited by elster on Monday 11th January 12:02
Jesus, the amount of times me and the mrs have had the exact conversation...although we're both 38!
I'm not sure you'll ever be 100% ready....As stated above, if it happens....it happens.
The last thing I want to do is to focus our entire existant on the fact that you MUST have kids, only for it not to happen....you know due to her tubes not being all that
I'm not sure you'll ever be 100% ready....As stated above, if it happens....it happens.
The last thing I want to do is to focus our entire existant on the fact that you MUST have kids, only for it not to happen....you know due to her tubes not being all that
and the vast majority will remain that way. Mate,
It's only as hard as you want it to be. I have a number of friends who hop between Oz and the U.K on an annual basis with kids. You adapt, you adjust and you make it work, and in the end it isn't really that hard.
The question to ask yourself is, will you regret having kids? Very unlikely I would suspect. Then, will I regret not having kids? Almost certainly would be my guess.
Just a thought.
Cheers.
It's only as hard as you want it to be. I have a number of friends who hop between Oz and the U.K on an annual basis with kids. You adapt, you adjust and you make it work, and in the end it isn't really that hard.
The question to ask yourself is, will you regret having kids? Very unlikely I would suspect. Then, will I regret not having kids? Almost certainly would be my guess.
Just a thought.
Cheers.
If you're not ready you're not ready, simple really.
However, my best mate and his wife (both 29) have been trying for 18 months to have a baby and have so far been unsuccessful, both are fertile though.
So even when you do want to, it might turn out that things don't work out how you imagine.
However, my best mate and his wife (both 29) have been trying for 18 months to have a baby and have so far been unsuccessful, both are fertile though.
So even when you do want to, it might turn out that things don't work out how you imagine.
dirty boy said:
If you're not ready you're not ready, simple really.
However, my best mate and his wife (both 29) have been trying for 18 months to have a baby and have so far been unsuccessful, both are fertile though.
So even when you do want to, it might turn out that things don't work out how you imagine.
I know, this is obviously a concern due to her age, what with the big M just round the corner.However, my best mate and his wife (both 29) have been trying for 18 months to have a baby and have so far been unsuccessful, both are fertile though.
So even when you do want to, it might turn out that things don't work out how you imagine.
Can you not get eggs stored now days in case it becomes an issue in the future?
I guess the only real answer is will you go travelling and realise your dreams if you don't have kids? If it's one of those things that realistically isn't going to happen, is it worth putting your life on hold for it?
I guess the only real answer is will you go travelling and realise your dreams if you don't have kids? If it's one of those things that realistically isn't going to happen, is it worth putting your life on hold for it?
ascayman said:
im not sure you are ever 'ready'. its life changing when it happens know doubt but you can still 'live the dream' when you have kids.
Agreed.We've done plenty with our kids in the last few years, still managed to have a couple of holidays, just not Vegas and San Fran etc this time.
Remember, if the kids are happy, you'll be happy.
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