A question to those who want to emigrate and those who have
Discussion
Personally I didnt find it difficult at all, we werent the closest of families and I knew that I would make new friends.
With phone, email, Facebook, etc. its easy to stay in touch and loads of mates will come and visit because they are interested in what you are doing and where you are living.
I've only been back to UK once in nine years (and couldnt wait to get back to NZ), it was good to see old friends but it wouldnt have been the end of the world if I hadnt.
With phone, email, Facebook, etc. its easy to stay in touch and loads of mates will come and visit because they are interested in what you are doing and where you are living.
I've only been back to UK once in nine years (and couldnt wait to get back to NZ), it was good to see old friends but it wouldnt have been the end of the world if I hadnt.
I've been away from the UK in Australia, New Zealand and now Thailand for the last 4 years.
I have found it not too bad. In some ways I'm closer to my parents, as I make a point of phoning them about once a week and talk a lot of things through with them in a way that I never would if I was living around the corner from them. Last month they came to visit me and I spent a solid week doing stuff with them every day.
I'm not saying it's better than being close by and I would like to see them more often, but it's definitely manageable.
It's a similar story with friends, though with a notable difference. Of the fairly big group of friends I had before I left, I'd say I have two really good mates who I am still in regular contact with. Others who I would have considered good friends I rarely hear from, and to be fair, rarely contact either. Not because of any bad feeling or anything else, and surely partly because of the time of life. I'm 31 now and ovr the last 4 years many/most of these friends have got married, had children, moved away themselves etc.
Similarly though, with those two, when I see them we have a great time.
On the flip side, I've made some fantastic friends while away, some who I will stay in touch with for life and some who have also moved on.
I would say if you are young with no serious commitments and a reasonably independent disposition then go for it. The world really isn't that big now, and even from England which is about as far as you can go (you're in NZ, right?) then if you really need to you can be back home in about 24 hours.
And with mobile phones, skype etc you can be in contact as often as you need to.
I have found it not too bad. In some ways I'm closer to my parents, as I make a point of phoning them about once a week and talk a lot of things through with them in a way that I never would if I was living around the corner from them. Last month they came to visit me and I spent a solid week doing stuff with them every day.
I'm not saying it's better than being close by and I would like to see them more often, but it's definitely manageable.
It's a similar story with friends, though with a notable difference. Of the fairly big group of friends I had before I left, I'd say I have two really good mates who I am still in regular contact with. Others who I would have considered good friends I rarely hear from, and to be fair, rarely contact either. Not because of any bad feeling or anything else, and surely partly because of the time of life. I'm 31 now and ovr the last 4 years many/most of these friends have got married, had children, moved away themselves etc.
Similarly though, with those two, when I see them we have a great time.
On the flip side, I've made some fantastic friends while away, some who I will stay in touch with for life and some who have also moved on.
I would say if you are young with no serious commitments and a reasonably independent disposition then go for it. The world really isn't that big now, and even from England which is about as far as you can go (you're in NZ, right?) then if you really need to you can be back home in about 24 hours.
And with mobile phones, skype etc you can be in contact as often as you need to.
GilbertGrape said:
To those who have or want to move to a far off country, how difficult will it be to leave family and friends behind?
How long is a piece of string? How close are you to your family and friends? We keep in touch by Skype, e-mail and telephone, and they're just a few hours away by plane. However, we've such an active ex-pat community out here we have a far busier social life than we ever had in the UK, and we have far more time to enjoy it. On the downside, it did take 10 days for the news to reach me that my brother had died, despite every member of the family being given contact details.
Our parents had all passed on, so that wasn't an issue, the only concern will be if either of our grown-up kids decide to make us grandparents, but there's no sign of that anytime soon.
There was one 'best' friend who made a huge issue of our going abroad, boooing and hooing and emotional blackmail, the whole nine yards, but they've made no attempt at contact since, even ignoring us on Skype, so how 'special' was that friendship?
The pro's and con's of emigration: only you can decide for yourself, our only regret is not doing it sooner.
GilbertGrape said:
To those who have or want to move to a far off country, how difficult will it be to leave family and friends behind?
As others have said it depends entirely on just how close you are and where your thinking of moving to. Personally I am from a very close family and at times I find it incredibly difficult, sure we have phones and skype and emails and facebook but its just not the same. I would say even if you think your not that close there are still going to be times you really miss that bit of regular contact or when family events happen you will wish your there.
As for friends, there are only 2 now that I keep in touch with but they were always my closest friends anyway.
At first all of my friends were emailing, messaging etc but over time that begins to dwindle. To be honest if they don't want to make the effort then pffft whatever. The ones that make an effort in return were your best friends.
I miss these 2 friends like I do my closest family but they are not in a position to be able to visit me and I'm not in a position to get back to the UK regularly.
I left Blighty nearly 11 years ago to pursue a life less ordinary. I ended up in Australia and haven't been back to the UK since. Before I left my parents had recently got divorced in the years prior, so it fractured our family quite badly. I think my sister resents me for leaving her with the emotional baggage my mother carried, we rarely speak and when I have contacted her in the past shes either to tired or busy. It used to bother me, but now she doesn't factor in my thinking, obviously a 5 minute phone call is far too hard for her so her loss. I talk to my younger brother and Mum all the time but haven't spoke to my dad for a few years either, he's the same as my sister, too wrapped up in their own lives. So there you have it, if your family is worth staying for then stay, if like mine they are some dysfunctional bunch of misfits then no great loss, enjoy where you finally emigrate too, you only get one life, why live it in misery just because a handful of people reckon life is peachy. The UK has gone down the toilet and should Labour get another term then i will burn my UK passport and officially become a citizen of Australia.
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