A helping hand for your kids?
A helping hand for your kids?
Author
Discussion

V8mate

Original Poster:

45,899 posts

219 months

Tuesday 4th May 2010
quotequote all
Reading through the 'If you need to go on the run' thread, do you think that you would, overall, benefit or hinder your children if you failed to register them?

Was just walking past our local Registry Office and saw a couple of mouth-breathers taking their new offspring in to have its NI number tattooed across its lower back. Probably getting it registered for unemployment benefit 16 years hence too.

Anyway, just say that you didn't tell 'the man' that you (or your OH) are pregnant. Have a home birth. Don't register the baby.

What are the upsides and downsides? Are there net benefits from giving your kids the gift of being 'off the grid' when they hit adulthood?

Flippin' Kipper

638 posts

209 months

Tuesday 4th May 2010
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Often wondered this too, bring them up to be assassins!

Landlord

12,689 posts

287 months

Tuesday 4th May 2010
quotequote all
What about healthcare? Could/would the NHS treat your little were he/she to fall ill if they "didn't exist"?

Don

28,378 posts

314 months

Tuesday 4th May 2010
quotequote all
V8mate said:
What are the upsides and downsides? Are there net benefits from giving your kids the gift of being 'off the grid' when they hit adulthood?
Up?

Can't think of any that would work.

Down: No child benefit, no state schooling, no NHS, no residency rights, no state pension, no unemployment benefit, no passport (so travel difficult) etc.

You'd have to create a fake id.

..and why would you when you can get a real one.

Jasandjules

72,626 posts

259 months

Tuesday 4th May 2010
quotequote all
Landlord said:
What about healthcare? Could/would the NHS treat your little were he/she to fall ill if they "didn't exist"?
Pretend to be a national of another country? The NHS still treats them does it not?

M3CHA-MONK3Y

6,095 posts

225 months

Tuesday 4th May 2010
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Hmmm, no perks from HRH or super-cool assasin child?

I seriously think the pro's outweigh the con's

AlmeraGTi

24 posts

208 months

Tuesday 4th May 2010
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To be fair, I don't think there's any real point not registering as you need an ID for everything these days. Your kids wont be able to get a job, they wont be able to open a bank account and they wont have national health etc. Only benifit would be not paying tax when in employment, and since you wont get a job anyway, I would say no.

AlmeraGti

Mr Will

13,719 posts

236 months

Tuesday 4th May 2010
quotequote all
Possibly more useful would be figuring out a way to register them twice, a fake identity that has been around for 18+ years could be very handy to fall back on should the st hit the fan, without the pitfalls of having no identity at all.

AlmeraGTi

24 posts

208 months

Tuesday 4th May 2010
quotequote all
Mr Will said:
Possibly more useful would be figuring out a way to register them twice, a fake identity that has been around for 18+ years could be very handy to fall back on should the st hit the fan, without the pitfalls of having no identity at all.
That wont work either, when one's missing from school and the authorities come knocking at your door, what reasonable explanation would you have for them?

CypherP

4,456 posts

222 months

Tuesday 4th May 2010
quotequote all
AlmeraGTi said:
Mr Will said:
Possibly more useful would be figuring out a way to register them twice, a fake identity that has been around for 18+ years could be very handy to fall back on should the st hit the fan, without the pitfalls of having no identity at all.
That wont work either, when one's missing from school and the authorities come knocking at your door, what reasonable explanation would you have for them?
You'd tell the authorities they are fine and asleep with the flu, the authorities then assume the story, following this up with around 50 or so more visits, before the fake child ends up 'dying' and someone in the local council gets the sack.

In all seriousness though, I don't think there would be many benefits to doing that. Regardless of how st our childcare and healthcare system seems in the UK, you'd most certainly have a worse time by raising a non-existent child. Not to mention they would be confined to a country that they technically don't belong in.

paoloh

8,617 posts

234 months

Tuesday 4th May 2010
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Landlord said:
What about healthcare? Could/would the NHS treat your little were he/she to fall ill if they "didn't exist"?
How would NHS know??

sonic_2k_uk

4,008 posts

237 months

Tuesday 4th May 2010
quotequote all
paoloh said:
Landlord said:
What about healthcare? Could/would the NHS treat your little were he/she to fall ill if they "didn't exist"?
How would NHS know??
They'd probably get the social to chase it up after finding the childs DNA wasn't on their database. whistle

cs02rm0

13,966 posts

221 months

Tuesday 4th May 2010
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I can't remember being asked for any ID with the NHS. Can morphine cause memory loss?

Landlord

12,689 posts

287 months

Tuesday 4th May 2010
quotequote all
paoloh said:
Landlord said:
What about healthcare? Could/would the NHS treat your little were he/she to fall ill if they "didn't exist"?
How would NHS know??
I don't know that they would. Hence the question mark on the end of the sentence.

ooo000ooo

2,647 posts

224 months

Tuesday 4th May 2010
quotequote all
would there be any benefit to registering your child as twins? Apart from the obvious double child benefit.
Or registering twins as one child thus giving them an alibi for a lifetime as a criminal mastermind (assuming they are identical) scratchchin

CypherP

4,456 posts

222 months

Tuesday 4th May 2010
quotequote all
ooo000ooo said:
would there be any benefit to registering your child as twins? Apart from the obvious double child benefit.
Or registering twins as one child thus giving them an alibi for a lifetime as a criminal mastermind (assuming they are identical) scratchchin
Former would be better than the latter, as an identical twin would have the same DNA so if they were on the run, it wouldn't be difficult to leave your mark which could easily be traced back to your twin and vice versa.

cs02rm0

13,966 posts

221 months

Tuesday 4th May 2010
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Aren't they better off just leading a double life - one normal, squeaky clean and legitimate identity and just carry out any subversive activities as someone else?

CaptainSlow

13,179 posts

242 months

Wednesday 5th May 2010
quotequote all
ooo000ooo said:
would there be any benefit to registering your child as twins? Apart from the obvious double child benefit.
Or registering twins as one child thus giving them an alibi for a lifetime as a criminal mastermind (assuming they are identical) scratchchin
You need an NHS number to register the birth. Therefore you'd need a midwife to help you fake the birth.

Mr Will

13,719 posts

236 months

Wednesday 5th May 2010
quotequote all
CaptainSlow said:
ooo000ooo said:
would there be any benefit to registering your child as twins? Apart from the obvious double child benefit.
Or registering twins as one child thus giving them an alibi for a lifetime as a criminal mastermind (assuming they are identical) scratchchin
You need an NHS number to register the birth. Therefore you'd need a midwife to help you fake the birth.
What happens if you give birth at home without a midwife? There is no obligation to have one in attendance.