Appropriate On Hold Music?

[plasticpig]

I rang an insurance company claim line today. As normal I was put on hold and listened to O Fortuna from Carl Orff's Carmina Burana (aka the Old Spice add music). Either the person choosing the music has a sense of humor or they are clueless as to the translation into English



O Fortune,like the moon
you are changeable,
ever waxing
and waning;
hateful life
first oppresses
and then soothes
as fancy takes it;
poverty
and power
it melts them like ice.
Fate - monstrous
and empty,
you whirling wheel,
you are malevolent,
well-being is vain
and always fades to nothing,
shadowed
and veiled
you plague me too;
now through the game
I bring my bare back
to your villainy.
Fate is against me
in health
and virtue,
driven on
and weighted down,
always enslaved.
So at this hour
without delay
pluck the vibrating strings;
since Fate
strikes down the strong man,
everyone weep with me!

[drivin_me_nuts]

Perhaps Firestarter would be worse than that.

My personal favourite on hold music is Bobby McFerrin Don't worry be happy, which somehow both irritates me senseless and yet is strangly calming at the same time.

[Timberwolf]

I've dealt with a company who have (or at least, had) Talking Heads' Road to Nowhere as their hold music...

(And yes, it could sometimes be very apt.)

[Tunku]

A Friend of mine had a successful Nursing Home business. He bought a new phone system. The default on hold music turned out to be "Abide with me". He was not happy.

[MGZRod]

I reckon that courts should use 'for whom the bell tolls' by metallica as theirs.

Or chacarron or something.

[James_N]

I work in a mental hospital (some of it secure) and we were discussing more appropriate hold music rather than the classical music we have now, I thought of:

Queen - I want to break free
Mental as anything - Live it up

cant think of the others at the moment If only i could change it!

[Swoxy]

I regularly call an IT company which has the tune from Pink Panther!

Edited by Swoxy on Saturday 21st August 03:13

[forsure]

Slightly off-topic, but I'm reminded of the time I used an automatic 'Superloo' in Paris.

The piped music playing was 'Yellow River'.

[Edinburger]

Probably an urban myth, but I'd heard the asthma helpline had Take My Breath Away.

[bazking69]

drivin_me_nuts said:

Perhaps Firestarter would be worse than that.

Done that one a few years ago. Swapped Vivaldi's Four Seasons for Fat of the Land for a couple of days until an email was sent from someone questioning the suitability!

[Elskeggso]

Player - Baby Come Back, when reporting a missing child.




Nicked from The Simpsons, I know...

[AndrewW-G]

James_N said:

I work in a mental hospital (some of it secure) and we were discussing more appropriate hold music rather than the classical music we have now, I thought of:

Queen - I want to break free
Mental as anything - Live it up

cant think of the others at the moment If only i could change it!

Breakout by the Foo Fighters

[kaese]

AndrewW-G said:

James_N said:

I work in a mental hospital (some of it secure) and we were discussing more appropriate hold music rather than the classical music we have now, I thought of:

Queen - I want to break free
Mental as anything - Live it up

cant think of the others at the moment If only i could change it!

Breakout by the Foo Fighters

Fun Boy Three - The Lunatics Have Taken Over the Asylum

Napoleon XIV - They're Coming to Take Me Away, Ha-Haaa

[marshalla]

James_N said:

I work in a mental hospital (some of it secure) and we were discussing more appropriate hold music rather than the classical music we have now, I thought of:

Queen - I want to break free
Mental as anything - Live it up

cant think of the others at the moment If only i could change it!

Surely this has to be a candidate ?

ETA : damnit! kaese beat me to it - still worth listening to though - now, where's the B-side ?

Edited by marshalla on Saturday 21st August 12:34

[ShiggyBiggs]

If I get pissed off with call centres Id sometimes put them 'on hold' and play either a midi version of 'drunken sailor', something by "pig destroyer" or maybe a bit of Rick Astley. Generally this is if they cant understand me, I cant understand them and they refuse to put me through to someone who speaks english as a first language.

[MrsMiggins]

I wanted our hold music changed to Que Sera Sera but our customer service manager thought it inappropriate.

She didn't think Joe Dolce's bit hit would be any good either.

[davidjpowell]

Breakers yard in Doncaster used to have 'Always look on the brightside'.

Heard it plenty of times after first replacement engine's oil pump seized after 1 day. Next replacement engine that they supplied, and my dimwitted mechanic installed was the wrong size.

They then found (or rather I told them where to find) was installed by them...

By that time there was no brightside.

[littlegreenfairy]

Some bit of the Carmina Burana is about shagging as far as I remember.

Anyhow, HSBC lost and stolen cards - things can only get better. Cracking choice.

[samuelellis]

in the dial up internet days i was with an isp called madasafish.net and the hold music at the time was ace of spades by motorhead

[NiceCupOfTea]

Communication Breakdown - Led Zep