Surviving the mental?

[dave-therave]

As I'm a good friend, I'm currently letting my (female) friend stay in my spare room as she's working locally and commuting from Wales to the Midlands every day would be silly.

This is the first time I've ever lived with a female (apart from my mum obviously) so I need some advice to avoid this going very wrong.

so....

Things to remember when living with a female?
Things I definitely shouldn't do?
Things I definitely shouldn't say?

I need your wisdom PH.

[JulianHJ]

Well it's your gaff, so your rules I guess. Stuff like putting the loo seat down and keeping the place clean and tidy certainly seem like no-brainers though.

[Tsippy]

1. Don't leave stray pubes in the soap
2. Flush after you've had a dump
3. Don't ask "What's this I found in the toilet?" whilst grasping what looks like a large cigarette dipped in marmite


you get the idea

[PhillT]

Don't worry about the toilet seat. They need it down, we need it up. If she has to lower it, tough, it's your house and it's not exactly raising the Titanic.
My sole piece of advice would be to buy as much toilet roll as you can possibly get your hands on. Every week.

[robsco]

Don't ask her if she takes it up the wrong 'un.

[thinfourth2]

dave-therave said:

Things to remember when living with a female?
.

You are in the wrong

[LukeBird]

robsco said:

Don't ask her if she takes it up the wrong 'un.

Yeah, don't ask.

It's easier to say sorry than ask permission!

[robsco]

LukeBird said:

robsco said:

Don't ask her if she takes it up the wrong 'un.

Yeah, don't ask.

It's easier to say sorry than ask permission!

Spoken like a true predator

[gareth.e]

Since shes not responsible for your ejaculation, pretty much anything goes...

[ShadownINja]

thinfourth2 said:

dave-therave said:

Things to remember when living with a female?
.

You are in the wrong

[RizzoTheRat]

PhillT said:

Don't worry about the toilet seat. They need it down, we need it up. If she has to lower it, tough, it's your house and it's not exactly raising the Titanic.
My sole piece of advice would be to buy as much toilet roll as you can possibly get your hands on. Every week.

I once managed to persuade an ex that when visiting the house I shared with a male housemate, she should put the seat back up when she'd finished.

[Timberwolf]

Mostly normal house-share rules. Things that I can remember from having female housemates:

• Get used to buying your toilet roll in at least 12-packs.
• If you are even remotely houseproud, make sure you are agreed on rules for washing-up, cleaning, leaving things lying around, etc. I know it sounds a bit Neal, "let's all have a house meeting everyone, okay" but IME women will live like complete pigs in someone else's house, it seems the "pick that up/tidy that/don't put that carburettor in the sink" instinct doesn't kick in until marriage, unfortunately.
• Make sure you have a bin in the bathroom! (This is the thing every man forgets).

[planetdave]

If there is unexplained chocolate in the house under no circumstances 'borrow' a bit.

[Jasandjules]

Don't walk around naked.
Don't ask her to save water by showering together.

[Laurel Green]

All of the above, plus; if she outstays her welcome, leave a Rohypnol to body weight chart lying around for her to see.

[Silver Smudger]

Tsippy said:

3. Don't ask "What's this I found in the toilet?" whilst grasping what looks like a large cigarette dipped in marmite

NOte to self - Don't eat lunch while browsing PH

[H_Kan]

Is she paying rent? If not, do what the hell you like, it's your house!

However, I would probably advise against wandering around starkers.

Edited by H_Kan on Sunday 19th September 15:14

[Flintstone]

H_Kan said:

....... wondering around starkers.

Could he ponder starkers? Maybe think about starkers? Why is wondering not allowed?


(I wonder).

[PHmember]

I often wonder whilst I'm starkers, I often wonder how I got so bloody fat. Not enough wandering I guess.

[essexplumber]

Pics?