Wiping your arse.
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Acehood

Original Poster:

1,326 posts

205 months

Friday 15th October 2010
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A few years ago, some baby wipes mysteriously appeared in the bathroom. Ever since, I've been making sure to have some ready for when it's Number 2 time. Today I had to use a 'normal' toilet with no luxury facilities and found it very difficult to obtain a satisfactory level of cleanliness using only regular toilet paper. I actually came home and got out my precious baby wipes then had a shower.

I assume I am not the only person who faces this kind of issue. It's a bit weird to carry baby wipes around with me all day, so what can I do? Is there some tips I'm missing out on? I think the problem stems from the hair down there. Stuff gets caught and when it's rubbed with a bit of paper it just smears around. I imagine that if I somehow got excrement in my hair (on my head), then rubbing it with some toilet paper would not be the first thing on my mind, so why is it commonplace to use it for your behind? The only rule I know of is "front to back".

In more technologically advanced countries like Japan, they often have toilets with in-built water jets and heating apparatus for drying. Fantastic idea. I don't want to have to move to Japan though. I'm currently trying to "re-train" my bowels so that I'll be at home when I need to go, however this is not a fool-proof solution.

Any advice would be appreciated.

E31Shrew

5,965 posts

223 months

Friday 15th October 2010
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Used to have Izal [ tracing paper ] at my grandads when I was a lad! Think yourself lucky

Major Fallout

5,278 posts

262 months

Friday 15th October 2010
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You need a goose!

Garlick

40,601 posts

271 months

Friday 15th October 2010
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Oh come on now, have we really reached these depths?
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