Door to doors sales
Discussion
Slightly inspired by the strange phone calls thread. How to you deal with some of these? Is it attitude dependant or just a standard I'm not interested.
My dad had a brilliant one a few weeks back. Guy knocks on the door wanting to sell new windows, pointed out we'd ahd them done recently (well they were in the house when we moved in and had been done a few years before, so straight away he's an idiot) he then had the cheek to ask my dad if he's run out of money as the front door hadn't been changed (the rather solid front door that was about to meet his face if he kept talking) - queue the best reply ever
'Have you been doing your job long mate? Because you might want to learn a new sales pitch, now f**k off now while you can still walk or keep talking and I'll break your legs you cheeky f**k'
Cloesly followed by one very sheepish and slightly scared looking little scrote walking offup the road
I've found the best way is to tell them I'm the homeowner, they see 2 cars outside, the house and a young lad answering the door. Then struggle to know what to say
My dad had a brilliant one a few weeks back. Guy knocks on the door wanting to sell new windows, pointed out we'd ahd them done recently (well they were in the house when we moved in and had been done a few years before, so straight away he's an idiot) he then had the cheek to ask my dad if he's run out of money as the front door hadn't been changed (the rather solid front door that was about to meet his face if he kept talking) - queue the best reply ever
'Have you been doing your job long mate? Because you might want to learn a new sales pitch, now f**k off now while you can still walk or keep talking and I'll break your legs you cheeky f**k'
Cloesly followed by one very sheepish and slightly scared looking little scrote walking offup the road
I've found the best way is to tell them I'm the homeowner, they see 2 cars outside, the house and a young lad answering the door. Then struggle to know what to say
S18DMW said:
I've found the best way is to tell them I'm the homeowner, they see 2 cars outside, the house and a young lad answering the door. Then struggle to know what to say
good moveI'm 26 but look quite young & several times over the time i've owned my place I have opened the door to a sales guy, who invariably has caught me at a bad time, & received the "is your mum or dad in?" line, I can safely say it never ends well for them
also had a mate of my neighbours son try it the other week, sit down for 5 minutes for a cuppa, scrote knocks on door to borrow something "is your mum in?" "well yes but its my house" "oh
" 
Edited by trix-a-belle on Monday 18th October 11:05
Turn up at the front door in an old lab coat I use for painting, (and has incidentally got red paint all over it) together with a big kitchen knife, and a glazed look on your face! You then don't even need to engage them in conversation.
Also works for Trick and Treaters as well!
Also works for Trick and Treaters as well!
Edited by AndrewTait on Monday 18th October 11:09
S18DMW said:
Slightly inspired by the strange phone calls thread. How to you deal with some of these? Is it attitude dependant or just a standard I'm not interested.
My dad had a brilliant one a few weeks back. Guy knocks on the door wanting to sell new windows, pointed out we'd ahd them done recently (well they were in the house when we moved in and had been done a few years before, so straight away he's an idiot) he then had the cheek to ask my dad if he's run out of money as the front door hadn't been changed (the rather solid front door that was about to meet his face if he kept talking) - queue the best reply ever
'Have you been doing your job long mate? Because you might want to learn a new sales pitch, now f**k off now while you can still walk or keep talking and I'll break your legs you cheeky f**k'
Cloesly followed by one very sheepish and slightly scared looking little scrote walking offup the road
I've found the best way is to tell them I'm the homeowner, they see 2 cars outside, the house and a young lad answering the door. Then struggle to know what to say
Yes I bet they are baffled how someone so much lower on the evolutionary ladder can so so well.My dad had a brilliant one a few weeks back. Guy knocks on the door wanting to sell new windows, pointed out we'd ahd them done recently (well they were in the house when we moved in and had been done a few years before, so straight away he's an idiot) he then had the cheek to ask my dad if he's run out of money as the front door hadn't been changed (the rather solid front door that was about to meet his face if he kept talking) - queue the best reply ever
'Have you been doing your job long mate? Because you might want to learn a new sales pitch, now f**k off now while you can still walk or keep talking and I'll break your legs you cheeky f**k'
Cloesly followed by one very sheepish and slightly scared looking little scrote walking offup the road
I've found the best way is to tell them I'm the homeowner, they see 2 cars outside, the house and a young lad answering the door. Then struggle to know what to say
Door to door sales peeps usually just get a not today/no thank you reply, although very few bother us as we are in a conservation area where you’d have your balls handed to you if you had anything but wooden doors and windows.
Jehovah’s witnesses have been asked to call back later as my boyfriend is really interested in hearing more about their religion which has always seemed to end in my g/f and I never being bothered by them again until we move
ETA the last owner of my house had a few debt issues which meant I had a few calls from debt collectors when we first bought. Most were absolutely fine people who received all the help I could offer (limited) and never caused me any issues. One had to be told that if he didn’t remove his foot from my door in the next 5 seconds there would be 16 stone of me behind the door as I closed it. Given they seemed to have forgotten their steel toe caps that day I ‘won’ that one without having to explain the burly bloke on my door step considering if he should be holding his broken foot or his crushed balls...
Jehovah’s witnesses have been asked to call back later as my boyfriend is really interested in hearing more about their religion which has always seemed to end in my g/f and I never being bothered by them again until we move
ETA the last owner of my house had a few debt issues which meant I had a few calls from debt collectors when we first bought. Most were absolutely fine people who received all the help I could offer (limited) and never caused me any issues. One had to be told that if he didn’t remove his foot from my door in the next 5 seconds there would be 16 stone of me behind the door as I closed it. Given they seemed to have forgotten their steel toe caps that day I ‘won’ that one without having to explain the burly bloke on my door step considering if he should be holding his broken foot or his crushed balls...
Edited by Rude-boy on Monday 18th October 11:16
eybic said:
Puggit said:
As a general rule I just say we are renting the house. Moves them away without any discussion every time.
definitely, works with all except energy companies and Jehovas. I always answer the door with the dog with me, she barks and barks i appolagise go back and close the door. And my dog gets a treat. Rude-boy said:
Door to door sales peeps usually just get a not today/no thank you reply, although very few bother us as we are in a conservation area where you’d have your balls handed to you if you had anything but wooden doors and windows.
Jehovah’s witnesses have been asked to call back later as my boyfriend is really interested in hearing more about their religion which has always seemed to end in my g/f and I never being bothered by them again until we move
Jehovah’s witnesses have been asked to call back later as my boyfriend is really interested in hearing more about their religion which has always seemed to end in my g/f and I never being bothered by them again until we move
love triangle?ZOLLAR said:
Rude-boy said:
Door to door sales peeps usually just get a not today/no thank you reply, although very few bother us as we are in a conservation area where you’d have your balls handed to you if you had anything but wooden doors and windows.
Jehovah’s witnesses have been asked to call back later as my boyfriend is really interested in hearing more about their religion which has always seemed to end in my g/f and I never being bothered by them again until we move
Jehovah’s witnesses have been asked to call back later as my boyfriend is really interested in hearing more about their religion which has always seemed to end in my g/f and I never being bothered by them again until we move
love triangle?Rude-boy said:
ZOLLAR said:
Rude-boy said:
Door to door sales peeps usually just get a not today/no thank you reply, although very few bother us as we are in a conservation area where you’d have your balls handed to you if you had anything but wooden doors and windows.
Jehovah’s witnesses have been asked to call back later as my boyfriend is really interested in hearing more about their religion which has always seemed to end in my g/f and I never being bothered by them again until we move
Jehovah’s witnesses have been asked to call back later as my boyfriend is really interested in hearing more about their religion which has always seemed to end in my g/f and I never being bothered by them again until we move
love triangle?, sorry i'm still a bit slow this morning .rich1231 said:
S18DMW said:
Slightly inspired by the strange phone calls thread. How to you deal with some of these? Is it attitude dependant or just a standard I'm not interested.
My dad had a brilliant one a few weeks back. Guy knocks on the door wanting to sell new windows, pointed out we'd ahd them done recently (well they were in the house when we moved in and had been done a few years before, so straight away he's an idiot) he then had the cheek to ask my dad if he's run out of money as the front door hadn't been changed (the rather solid front door that was about to meet his face if he kept talking) - queue the best reply ever
'Have you been doing your job long mate? Because you might want to learn a new sales pitch, now f**k off now while you can still walk or keep talking and I'll break your legs you cheeky f**k'
Cloesly followed by one very sheepish and slightly scared looking little scrote walking offup the road
I've found the best way is to tell them I'm the homeowner, they see 2 cars outside, the house and a young lad answering the door. Then struggle to know what to say
Yes I bet they are baffled how someone so much lower on the evolutionary ladder can so so well.My dad had a brilliant one a few weeks back. Guy knocks on the door wanting to sell new windows, pointed out we'd ahd them done recently (well they were in the house when we moved in and had been done a few years before, so straight away he's an idiot) he then had the cheek to ask my dad if he's run out of money as the front door hadn't been changed (the rather solid front door that was about to meet his face if he kept talking) - queue the best reply ever
'Have you been doing your job long mate? Because you might want to learn a new sales pitch, now f**k off now while you can still walk or keep talking and I'll break your legs you cheeky f**k'
Cloesly followed by one very sheepish and slightly scared looking little scrote walking offup the road
I've found the best way is to tell them I'm the homeowner, they see 2 cars outside, the house and a young lad answering the door. Then struggle to know what to say
KenBlocksPants said:
Is it just me but I normally say I'm ok thank you, wish them luck, and politely close the door?
They're only doing their (s
tty) job.
Judging by some of the scrotes that are flogging energy / windows / gutting round my way. I'd rather they were doing that than on the dole.
I feel that way about the people who stop you in the street with a clip board. That's one job I wouldn't want to do. They're only doing their (s
tty) job.Judging by some of the scrotes that are flogging energy / windows / gutting round my way. I'd rather they were doing that than on the dole.
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