Discussion
DISCLAIMER: I know this is a car forum but it I wanted to tap in on the huge amount of expertise on here 
This is obviously an anonymous post (I'm a long standing PH member) but I really need some help. I'm married and have been for a long time but have found that I'm constantly thinking of a woman I've met who is also in a relationship. There's a distance between us and I'm not even sure she knows I like her. I have been thinking of nothing else, it's starting to affect all aspects of my life and I can't get closure.
I have been tempted to send a friendly non psycho e-mail (no other contact method) to tell her how I feel, even though this won't change things it may help me to get closure. I would also feel like this in itself was cheating on my wife.
Please share your advice?
This is obviously an anonymous post (I'm a long standing PH member) but I really need some help. I'm married and have been for a long time but have found that I'm constantly thinking of a woman I've met who is also in a relationship. There's a distance between us and I'm not even sure she knows I like her. I have been thinking of nothing else, it's starting to affect all aspects of my life and I can't get closure.
I have been tempted to send a friendly non psycho e-mail (no other contact method) to tell her how I feel, even though this won't change things it may help me to get closure. I would also feel like this in itself was cheating on my wife.
Please share your advice?
v10dweeb said:
..a woman I've met who is also in a relationship..
..I have been tempted to send a friendly non psycho e-mail (no other contact method) to tell her how I feel..
Please share your advice?
First thoughts, bad idea. ..I have been tempted to send a friendly non psycho e-mail (no other contact method) to tell her how I feel..
Please share your advice?
Why potentially ruin the relationship she has with her partner just because of your infatuation.
Not meant to sound harsh btw.
k. If you still want to be with her it's love, if not it's lust.v10dweeb said:
DISCLAIMER: I know this is a car forum but it I wanted to tap in on the huge amount of expertise on here
This is obviously an anonymous post (I'm a long standing PH member) but I really need some help. I'm married and have been for a long time but have found that I'm constantly thinking of a woman I've met who is also in a relationship. There's a distance between us and I'm not even sure she knows I like her. I have been thinking of nothing else, it's starting to affect all aspects of my life and I can't get closure.
I have been tempted to send a friendly non psycho e-mail (no other contact method) to tell her how I feel, even though this won't change things it may help me to get closure. I would also feel like this in itself was cheating on my wife.
Please share your advice?
This is obviously an anonymous post (I'm a long standing PH member) but I really need some help. I'm married and have been for a long time but have found that I'm constantly thinking of a woman I've met who is also in a relationship. There's a distance between us and I'm not even sure she knows I like her. I have been thinking of nothing else, it's starting to affect all aspects of my life and I can't get closure.
I have been tempted to send a friendly non psycho e-mail (no other contact method) to tell her how I feel, even though this won't change things it may help me to get closure. I would also feel like this in itself was cheating on my wife.
Please share your advice?
Prozac
Simply an will for most people cure that love sick feeling, which is down to the limerence state your brain is in.
Google depression and talk to your doctor, provided you are experiencing a mix of the depression symptoms listed - or are prepared to say so, you'll get a script.
[url=http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chemical_basis_for_love]
"Serotonin
Chemically, the serotonin effects of being infatuated have a similar chemical appearance to obsessive-compulsive disorder; which could explain why people experiencing infatuation cannot think of anyone else.[9] For this reason some[who?] assert that taking SSRIs and other antidepressants impede one's ability to fall in love. In one particular case anthropologist Helen Fisher noted:
I know of one couple on the edge of divorce. The wife was on an antidepressant. Then she went off it, started having orgasms once more, felt the renewal of sexual attraction for her husband, and they're now in love all over again.[10]"
[/url]
Simply an will for most people cure that love sick feeling, which is down to the limerence state your brain is in.
Google depression and talk to your doctor, provided you are experiencing a mix of the depression symptoms listed - or are prepared to say so, you'll get a script.
[url=http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chemical_basis_for_love]
"Serotonin
Chemically, the serotonin effects of being infatuated have a similar chemical appearance to obsessive-compulsive disorder; which could explain why people experiencing infatuation cannot think of anyone else.[9] For this reason some[who?] assert that taking SSRIs and other antidepressants impede one's ability to fall in love. In one particular case anthropologist Helen Fisher noted:
I know of one couple on the edge of divorce. The wife was on an antidepressant. Then she went off it, started having orgasms once more, felt the renewal of sexual attraction for her husband, and they're now in love all over again.[10]"
[/url]
Edited by rudecherub on Friday 12th August 14:57
rudecherub said:
Prozac
Simply an SSRI will for most people cure that love sick feeling, which is down to the limerence state your brain is in.
Google depression and talk to your doctor, provided you are experiencing a mix of the depression symptoms listed - or are prepared to say so, you'll get a script.
[url=http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chemical_basis_for_love]"Serotonin
Chemically, the serotonin effects of being infatuated have a similar chemical appearance to obsessive-compulsive disorder; which could explain why people experiencing infatuation cannot think of anyone else.[9] For this reason some[who?] assert that taking SSRIs and other antidepressants impede one's ability to fall in love. In one particular case anthropologist Helen Fisher noted:
I know of one couple on the edge of divorce. The wife was on an antidepressant. Then she went off it, started having orgasms once more, felt the renewal of sexual attraction for her husband, and they're now in love all over again.[10]" [/url]
This does fit in. Simply an SSRI will for most people cure that love sick feeling, which is down to the limerence state your brain is in.
Google depression and talk to your doctor, provided you are experiencing a mix of the depression symptoms listed - or are prepared to say so, you'll get a script.
[url=http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chemical_basis_for_love]"Serotonin
Chemically, the serotonin effects of being infatuated have a similar chemical appearance to obsessive-compulsive disorder; which could explain why people experiencing infatuation cannot think of anyone else.[9] For this reason some[who?] assert that taking SSRIs and other antidepressants impede one's ability to fall in love. In one particular case anthropologist Helen Fisher noted:
I know of one couple on the edge of divorce. The wife was on an antidepressant. Then she went off it, started having orgasms once more, felt the renewal of sexual attraction for her husband, and they're now in love all over again.[10]" [/url]
v10dweeb said:
Thanks Hoof. Ive been trying this but it's been harder than I thought .
You're all right. It's not a good idea to contact her and I should man up to the fact that I'm luckier than a lot of others are.
I wouldn't necessarily say "man up" but I suppose it is doing so. Just occupy yourself, talk to your wife more, try sex with her You're all right. It's not a good idea to contact her and I should man up to the fact that I'm luckier than a lot of others are.
, just stay focussed. Going on anti-depressants because you fancy someone sounds a bit over the top. Plus, you might go off your wife altogether and she will go astray.
I suspect if you were to email this woman, her response may well surprise (and upset) you, and then you'd realise you didn't particularly like her after all.
Problem is, you'll feel rather stupid too, after all, I'm guessing you're no longer a teenager?
If you have to meet or have contact with her for work purposes, things are likely to get a bit awkward.
Of course, she may well feel the same way as you, and right at this moment be starting a thread on Mumsnet, or whichever PH equivalent there is for ladies.
As others have alluded to though, a world of pain and stress awaits you if you go down this route. I'm not saying don't do it, as it may well work out for you and be the better option, I don't know your circumstances. However, be realistic. It's a crush, and very likely not reciprocated.
Problem is, you'll feel rather stupid too, after all, I'm guessing you're no longer a teenager?
If you have to meet or have contact with her for work purposes, things are likely to get a bit awkward.
Of course, she may well feel the same way as you, and right at this moment be starting a thread on Mumsnet, or whichever PH equivalent there is for ladies.
As others have alluded to though, a world of pain and stress awaits you if you go down this route. I'm not saying don't do it, as it may well work out for you and be the better option, I don't know your circumstances. However, be realistic. It's a crush, and very likely not reciprocated.
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