Anxiety / Stress /hypochondriac ? ?
Discussion
Hey guys hope this thread finds you well.
Just looking for a bit of advice really. I've been through what I'm going through once before. It was about 3 and a bit years ago. My first born had been born 3 months early and had been close to leaving us a few times. I was trying to juggle work and visiting hospital etc etc. It eventually got too much and I wasn't sleeping, was getting twinges in my chest and arm (was convinced I was having a stroke/heart attack)
Anyways I'd lost all concentration, energy etc and was signed of on stat sick pay for two weeks
The feelings have started to come back again. We had to call the ambulance out for my little one a few weeks ago and whilst she was out within 3 days it's nicked me back. I was sick myself straight after and had to miss a few days work. We don't get paid for sick and so I'm now in a spiral of worry.
I've lost pay, had my work load pile up to an unreasonable (I think) level along with the obvious worry over my daughter. I've stopped sleeping, am getting really really uncomfortable twinges in my chest and tension in my arms. I'm con corned of I go the drs they will suggest some form of being signed off which means no pay and also I'm concerned how this looks to my employer.
Would I best trying to speak to someone in work first to tell them I'm struggling or am I best to hit n hope with the drs first and see what happens?
Just looking for a bit of advice really. I've been through what I'm going through once before. It was about 3 and a bit years ago. My first born had been born 3 months early and had been close to leaving us a few times. I was trying to juggle work and visiting hospital etc etc. It eventually got too much and I wasn't sleeping, was getting twinges in my chest and arm (was convinced I was having a stroke/heart attack)
Anyways I'd lost all concentration, energy etc and was signed of on stat sick pay for two weeks
The feelings have started to come back again. We had to call the ambulance out for my little one a few weeks ago and whilst she was out within 3 days it's nicked me back. I was sick myself straight after and had to miss a few days work. We don't get paid for sick and so I'm now in a spiral of worry.
I've lost pay, had my work load pile up to an unreasonable (I think) level along with the obvious worry over my daughter. I've stopped sleeping, am getting really really uncomfortable twinges in my chest and tension in my arms. I'm con corned of I go the drs they will suggest some form of being signed off which means no pay and also I'm concerned how this looks to my employer.
Would I best trying to speak to someone in work first to tell them I'm struggling or am I best to hit n hope with the drs first and see what happens?
Health comes first, family a close second and work a distant fifth or sixth. Sounds like stress and that's not to be taken lightly, esp if it causing physical symptoms. I'm not sure a couple of weeks off work will make it go away - proper help, including self-help, is what you need to get to the root of the issues. Good luck, do some reading on t'web but do seek pro help, maybe a referral from your GP.
I'm sure if you go to the doctor he will give you some tablets to reduce your stress levels. They usually only sign you off work if you request it, or are so seriously ill that you are at serious risk otherwise.
Don't worry, we all suffer stress at various times and it's the build-up over a period of time that brings it to a head.
Don't worry, we all suffer stress at various times and it's the build-up over a period of time that brings it to a head.
Sorry to hear about your situation. The only advice I can suggest is that you are forthcoming and honest with your work about what you're experiencing. There's really no downside, and they may surprise you with their support.. even if not at least they know what's going on and won't get cross / suspicious at you taking time out.
I have a fair bit of experience with anxiety and stress so I know what you are going through and how it feels. I think you talk to both your GP and your work.
Explain the situation at work, unless they are complete bell-ends they should try to find some way to ease the pressure. Having an employee at breaking point does them no good so they should see the value in giving you help.
GPs these days seem very patient led. They will ask you if you want to be signed off but they are not going to do that as a matter of course. They will offer you anti-depressant drugs. They might also offer you beta-blockers which help with some of the physical symptoms. They should also offer you counselling. Personally I took the counselling and beta blockers. I tried the anti-ds before and didn't get on with them.
You should also push for a blood test. I did recently and it showed low Vit d and low testosterone. Both which can impact mood. I am just waiting for them to prescribe something for both of those -had to repeat the test.
There are things you can do to improve it on your own. Excessive drinking can make anxiety worse. A good diet and some exercise can help as well.
Mostly you need to find the source of the issue. Is it that your have too much pressure at work or do you need to handle that pressure more effectively? Some counselling takes the form of CBT which re trains your way of thinking to change negative thoughts. This can help you deal with pressure a bit more.
Loads of people suffer with things like this and there is no shame in asking for help.
Explain the situation at work, unless they are complete bell-ends they should try to find some way to ease the pressure. Having an employee at breaking point does them no good so they should see the value in giving you help.
GPs these days seem very patient led. They will ask you if you want to be signed off but they are not going to do that as a matter of course. They will offer you anti-depressant drugs. They might also offer you beta-blockers which help with some of the physical symptoms. They should also offer you counselling. Personally I took the counselling and beta blockers. I tried the anti-ds before and didn't get on with them.
You should also push for a blood test. I did recently and it showed low Vit d and low testosterone. Both which can impact mood. I am just waiting for them to prescribe something for both of those -had to repeat the test.
There are things you can do to improve it on your own. Excessive drinking can make anxiety worse. A good diet and some exercise can help as well.
Mostly you need to find the source of the issue. Is it that your have too much pressure at work or do you need to handle that pressure more effectively? Some counselling takes the form of CBT which re trains your way of thinking to change negative thoughts. This can help you deal with pressure a bit more.
Loads of people suffer with things like this and there is no shame in asking for help.
Thanks for the replies guys.
This morning took a bit of a nasty turn to be fair. Jumped up out of bed grabbed a shower. Shot towards work and the first set of lights I stopped at ... bamm it felt like someone was stabbing me just above the heart, my left arm had gone completely still and I struggled to catch my breath a little.
I'd not had it that severe before so off I trotted to the hossy to just get checked over.
Had the usual blood pressure tests heart rate stats etc to check the ticker ok. Was confirmed not having heart attack or stroke. Long n short of it is I've been been diagnosed with depression, a chest bone inflammation and prescribed tablets for the chest and counciling for my head.
However given that I have mild cerebral palsy and the complications I suffer with that are also flairing up due to the lack of sleep and tension it's also suggested I'm signed off for a while even if it's to just get back up to running order and not relieving the depression or what ever it is.
Had a chat with the Mrs and going to sit down and work out what's really bothering me. Is it worth looking at less money less stressful job for now- is the little one's full on care needs really a bigger issue for me than I'm letting on - what can I do to get a bit fitter without taking away time helping with the little ones care.
Also will be booking the counciling tomorrow which I hope helps too
This morning took a bit of a nasty turn to be fair. Jumped up out of bed grabbed a shower. Shot towards work and the first set of lights I stopped at ... bamm it felt like someone was stabbing me just above the heart, my left arm had gone completely still and I struggled to catch my breath a little.
I'd not had it that severe before so off I trotted to the hossy to just get checked over.
Had the usual blood pressure tests heart rate stats etc to check the ticker ok. Was confirmed not having heart attack or stroke. Long n short of it is I've been been diagnosed with depression, a chest bone inflammation and prescribed tablets for the chest and counciling for my head.
However given that I have mild cerebral palsy and the complications I suffer with that are also flairing up due to the lack of sleep and tension it's also suggested I'm signed off for a while even if it's to just get back up to running order and not relieving the depression or what ever it is.
Had a chat with the Mrs and going to sit down and work out what's really bothering me. Is it worth looking at less money less stressful job for now- is the little one's full on care needs really a bigger issue for me than I'm letting on - what can I do to get a bit fitter without taking away time helping with the little ones care.
Also will be booking the counciling tomorrow which I hope helps too
Talk
Talk
Talk.
One of the worst things people do is not do this.
You've spoken to your Mrs which is great, now go see your Doc and then your employer. Don't hold back, tell them the full deal.
Hopefully between you you will form a plan led by your Doc. It may start with some ADs to begin with, then CBT (works for some) if not onto counselling (or maybe in different order). Remember this it's important:
You will not be of any use to anyone if you are not in a good place yourself, so you must look after yourself and get yourself in this place then you can help those who are important to you, that includes your employer as well as your family.
All the best, hope it works out well.
Talk
Talk.
One of the worst things people do is not do this.
You've spoken to your Mrs which is great, now go see your Doc and then your employer. Don't hold back, tell them the full deal.
Hopefully between you you will form a plan led by your Doc. It may start with some ADs to begin with, then CBT (works for some) if not onto counselling (or maybe in different order). Remember this it's important:
You will not be of any use to anyone if you are not in a good place yourself, so you must look after yourself and get yourself in this place then you can help those who are important to you, that includes your employer as well as your family.
All the best, hope it works out well.
Cheers 227bhp yeah talking isn't one of my specialties.
Dr has asked me to think about ads but to be honest I think I'll just try the counciling first.
The Dr has already referred me and I just need to call tomorrow to confirm the paperwork has been received
I've never really given it a shot before. We were offered it in the hospital when the little one was born but the one session I had that time wasn't really what I wanted. She was so tiny helpless and ill I didn't want to think anything but about her getting better.
I guess it won't hurt at all.
Dr has asked me to think about ads but to be honest I think I'll just try the counciling first.
The Dr has already referred me and I just need to call tomorrow to confirm the paperwork has been received
I've never really given it a shot before. We were offered it in the hospital when the little one was born but the one session I had that time wasn't really what I wanted. She was so tiny helpless and ill I didn't want to think anything but about her getting better.
I guess it won't hurt at all.
Ross1303 said:
Cheers 227bhp yeah talking isn't one of my specialties.
Dr has asked me to think about ads but to be honest I think I'll just try the counseling first.
The Dr has already referred me and I just need to call tomorrow to confirm the paperwork has been received
I've never really given it a shot before. We were offered it in the hospital when the little one was born but the one session I had that time wasn't really what I wanted. She was so tiny helpless and ill I didn't want to think anything but about her getting better.
I guess it won't hurt at all.
You've taken the decision to not use ADs and that's fair enough, (seriously, it is) but don't disregard them totally, try to keep an open mind, sometimes they can help to level out those ups and downs you may have. What you have to be aware of is they are just a temporary measure to help, not permanent, but if you can manage without then it's fine.Dr has asked me to think about ads but to be honest I think I'll just try the counseling first.
The Dr has already referred me and I just need to call tomorrow to confirm the paperwork has been received
I've never really given it a shot before. We were offered it in the hospital when the little one was born but the one session I had that time wasn't really what I wanted. She was so tiny helpless and ill I didn't want to think anything but about her getting better.
I guess it won't hurt at all.
What I would also like to say is that you are at the beginning of a bit of a journey, it may be straight forward, it might not be. You might also take a wrong turn, have to go back to the start and try another avenue. It's like when an unfamiliar car breaks down apparently for no reason and you look under the bonnet at this mass of pipes and wires and think 'WTF?
' You've probably got a s
tload whirling around in your head sometimes, but if given time and guidance you slow down, unpick it, understand it and learn what is what, slowly it gets easier.I'm hoping what I typed wasn't condescending, it wasn't intended. I think that when we go through these difficult periods and come out of the other side educated then we can be in a better place than we were before.
If you have been somewhere, it doesn't matter whether to the shops or Hell and back, you are better off in some ways than you were before.
Not condescending at all pal.
I've not ruled ADs out just yet and did say I'd be back next week if I'd not got a handle on it.
That being said I dislike medication at the best of times. I should be on pretty regular baclofen for the regular spasms I have with the cerebral palsy but would rather have the spasms when they are mild than the side effects to the tablets
I've not really been here before so that's why I've posted.
It's a bit of one of those subjects where I guess strangers can take an unbiased view.
For example I belled my old man cos I remembered when we were kids he was on some sort of mediacation - apparently beta blockers for temper or something. He was a bit like "seriously depressed? You don't seem it. Had a good laugh with me the other week,you've been out with the Mrs, daughters been better than usual etc".
To be honest I was expecting a bit of a rollicking for wasting doctors time today a bit of a "man the f up" moment. It's sort of what's going through my head at the minute too, like I'm admitting defeat against something seemingly that most people (I imagine) just get on with day to day.
Ps sorry for the rants post
I've not ruled ADs out just yet and did say I'd be back next week if I'd not got a handle on it.
That being said I dislike medication at the best of times. I should be on pretty regular baclofen for the regular spasms I have with the cerebral palsy but would rather have the spasms when they are mild than the side effects to the tablets
I've not really been here before so that's why I've posted.
It's a bit of one of those subjects where I guess strangers can take an unbiased view.
For example I belled my old man cos I remembered when we were kids he was on some sort of mediacation - apparently beta blockers for temper or something. He was a bit like "seriously depressed? You don't seem it. Had a good laugh with me the other week,you've been out with the Mrs, daughters been better than usual etc".
To be honest I was expecting a bit of a rollicking for wasting doctors time today a bit of a "man the f up" moment. It's sort of what's going through my head at the minute too, like I'm admitting defeat against something seemingly that most people (I imagine) just get on with day to day.
Ps sorry for the rants post
Like 944fan, I've a lot of experience of anxiety, stress and the physical manifestations they can present.
In the past, I paid a lot off attention to the work of Dr. Claire Weekes. She was an Australian research scientist who progressed to becoming a GP and she is often quoted today in popular works on psychology. She was/is considered a pioneer of cognitive therapy.
She said, in one of her books...
"Through the years I have seen every shade of every trick my patients’ nerves have played upon them."
In continuing to explore what she called 'nervous illness' she related many experiences of seeing all manner of 'somatisations', as psychosomatic problems came to be known.
You may or may not want to Google the name and check out the books. I went on to get an MSc in psychology and found Dr. Weekes' ideas remained practically watertight throughout.
In the past, I paid a lot off attention to the work of Dr. Claire Weekes. She was an Australian research scientist who progressed to becoming a GP and she is often quoted today in popular works on psychology. She was/is considered a pioneer of cognitive therapy.
She said, in one of her books...
"Through the years I have seen every shade of every trick my patients’ nerves have played upon them."
In continuing to explore what she called 'nervous illness' she related many experiences of seeing all manner of 'somatisations', as psychosomatic problems came to be known.
You may or may not want to Google the name and check out the books. I went on to get an MSc in psychology and found Dr. Weekes' ideas remained practically watertight throughout.
Edited by davhill on Friday 1st January 16:11
Just as a bit of an update. Have had a strange few weeks of feeling distant a bit down n not wanting to chat to the Mrs etc.
However the attacks I'm having are getting a little more frequent ie had 4/5 this week.
Worst was today. Got on the motorway to work n immediately stuck in a jam. Called work n they knew about it and not to worry, see you when I see you etc. But as soon as the phone went down so did my head. Almost like a surging feeling in my head, left chest and arm went tight and my breathing was noticeably heavier/faster etc.
Managed to ride it out for a bit by chatting on the phone to the old man (hands free parrot thingy by the way).
Got to work but I just can't concentrate, nothing sticks in my head and I still feel sick.
Got counciling assessment tomorrow so hopefully something comes from that and back the drs for some meds I think.
Really quite worried I'm cracking up, need to support my family etc and it all seems to be getting quite difficult
However the attacks I'm having are getting a little more frequent ie had 4/5 this week.
Worst was today. Got on the motorway to work n immediately stuck in a jam. Called work n they knew about it and not to worry, see you when I see you etc. But as soon as the phone went down so did my head. Almost like a surging feeling in my head, left chest and arm went tight and my breathing was noticeably heavier/faster etc.
Managed to ride it out for a bit by chatting on the phone to the old man (hands free parrot thingy by the way).
Got to work but I just can't concentrate, nothing sticks in my head and I still feel sick.
Got counciling assessment tomorrow so hopefully something comes from that and back the drs for some meds I think.
Really quite worried I'm cracking up, need to support my family etc and it all seems to be getting quite difficult
Sound like a panic attack and/or hyperventilating, I was getting these from time to time not a full blown panic attack but hyperventilation weird thing is I never really noticed my heart racing at first but the impact was light headedness/spaced out feeling, tight chest and achy muscles.
Check your breathing rate when feeling ok and when having an attack I was told you should be breathing 10-12 times per minute even when I was ok I was clocking double that! Your bloodstream ends up with to much carbon dioxide causing these systems. i seem to be ok now but if I felt like I was struggling I either lay down or got myself away from everything closed my eyes and done 3 seconds in and 3 out breaths (through my nose) which regulated my heart beat again but it can take a while before your head clears properly.
would speak to the docs and get some tests done BP and blood tests etc.
Check your breathing rate when feeling ok and when having an attack I was told you should be breathing 10-12 times per minute even when I was ok I was clocking double that! Your bloodstream ends up with to much carbon dioxide causing these systems. i seem to be ok now but if I felt like I was struggling I either lay down or got myself away from everything closed my eyes and done 3 seconds in and 3 out breaths (through my nose) which regulated my heart beat again but it can take a while before your head clears properly.
would speak to the docs and get some tests done BP and blood tests etc.
Ross1303 said:
Just as a bit of an update. Have had a strange few weeks of feeling distant a bit down n not wanting to chat to the Mrs etc.
However the attacks I'm having are getting a little more frequent ie had 4/5 this week.
Worst was today. Got on the motorway to work n immediately stuck in a jam. Called work n they knew about it and not to worry, see you when I see you etc. But as soon as the phone went down so did my head. Almost like a surging feeling in my head, left chest and arm went tight and my breathing was noticeably heavier/faster etc.
Managed to ride it out for a bit by chatting on the phone to the old man (hands free parrot thingy by the way).
Got to work but I just can't concentrate, nothing sticks in my head and I still feel sick.
Got counciling assessment tomorrow so hopefully something comes from that and back the drs for some meds I think.
Really quite worried I'm cracking up, need to support my family etc and it all seems to be getting quite difficult
Hi there, this sounds like stress resulting in anxiety / panic attacks. You never mentioned whether you started medication or not? However the attacks I'm having are getting a little more frequent ie had 4/5 this week.
Worst was today. Got on the motorway to work n immediately stuck in a jam. Called work n they knew about it and not to worry, see you when I see you etc. But as soon as the phone went down so did my head. Almost like a surging feeling in my head, left chest and arm went tight and my breathing was noticeably heavier/faster etc.
Managed to ride it out for a bit by chatting on the phone to the old man (hands free parrot thingy by the way).
Got to work but I just can't concentrate, nothing sticks in my head and I still feel sick.
Got counciling assessment tomorrow so hopefully something comes from that and back the drs for some meds I think.
Really quite worried I'm cracking up, need to support my family etc and it all seems to be getting quite difficult
Just be aware that antidepressants (SSRI's are mostly used now)are not always very effective at dealing with stress. However they are good at dealing with anxiety / panic attacks.
If you haven't started taking any, they may be a good option, as would a betablocker (propranolol is most often used) used on a 'as and when' basis, as this can help stop the symptoms you're getting.
The poster above me has mentioned something about too much CO2 in your body, that's not stricly correct, if anything, you blow off too much CO2, become alkalotic, which then results in imbalances in the salts in your body resulting in the symptoms you feel.
I would seriously look into getting some CBT long term, and removing the stressor in the short term.
(amended for typing errors)
meddyg said:
Hi there, this sounds like stress resulting in anxiety / panic attacks. You never mentioned whether you started medication or not?
Just be aware that antidepressants (SSRI's are mostly used now)are not always very effective at dealing with stress. However they are good at dealing with anxiety / panic attacks.
If you haven't started taking any, they may be a good option, as would a betablocker (propranolol is most often used) used on a 'as and when' basis, as this can help stop the symptoms you're getting.
The poster above me has mentioned something about too much CO2 in your body, that's not stricly correct, if anything, you blow off too much CO2, become alkalotic, which then results in imbalances in the salts in your body resulting in the symptoms you feel.
I would seriously look into getting some CBT long term, and removing the stressor in the short term.
(amended for typing errors)
Apologies I must have got duff information!Just be aware that antidepressants (SSRI's are mostly used now)are not always very effective at dealing with stress. However they are good at dealing with anxiety / panic attacks.
If you haven't started taking any, they may be a good option, as would a betablocker (propranolol is most often used) used on a 'as and when' basis, as this can help stop the symptoms you're getting.
The poster above me has mentioned something about too much CO2 in your body, that's not stricly correct, if anything, you blow off too much CO2, become alkalotic, which then results in imbalances in the salts in your body resulting in the symptoms you feel.
I would seriously look into getting some CBT long term, and removing the stressor in the short term.
(amended for typing errors)
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