Discussion
Anyone else suffer........... or just want a laugh.
Went through my 20s (young I know) suffering badly with these and then had a good few years off or very minor ones. A trip to Mexico seems to have triggered it again.Its gone down mostly but not fully.
Any recommendations for which treatment. Its an outy not an inny. had a brown cream before which helped a little but anything newer in recent years.
Went through my 20s (young I know) suffering badly with these and then had a good few years off or very minor ones. A trip to Mexico seems to have triggered it again.Its gone down mostly but not fully.
Any recommendations for which treatment. Its an outy not an inny. had a brown cream before which helped a little but anything newer in recent years.
Forgive the terminology but this is a pharmacist's bread and butter. Go in when it's quiet, ask for a 'consultation', follow their advice.
Sounds like the recurrence was food/diet related with your travel - did you suffer an attack of the brown rain (or, alternately, block yourself up solid by eating a s
tload of red meat…)?
Sounds like the recurrence was food/diet related with your travel - did you suffer an attack of the brown rain (or, alternately, block yourself up solid by eating a s
tload of red meat…)? Did have what I thought was a spell of them a while back, sore tender bum hole, didn't bother with any pile cream, just used a bit of the kids nappy cream (Sudocrem) to help settle things down a bit. Thing that really helps me, and I won't go anywhere without some now, is the moist toilet tissue they sell in the supermarket for the final clean up 
a) invest in some cosmocol/Movicol/CheapoBum or whatever the magic keep-yer-gut-moving stuff is currently rebadged as, it'll help things to heal up if you're not errr exerting effort 'at stool'.
b) travelling, carry a bottle of E45, wet the bog roll with a drop of it, instant wet wipes only cheaper and more portable.
b) travelling, carry a bottle of E45, wet the bog roll with a drop of it, instant wet wipes only cheaper and more portable.
I had a work colleague who didn't know he had one, just thought he had a spot there so tried and tried to squeeze it. I cried with laughter when he told me knowing how painful they can be!!
Do the following, eat fruit / veg more regularly. Soft stools are better than trying to st a rock.
Go buy Anusol suppositories and the cream as well. Get personal with yourself and finger a suppository up your hoop then apply the cream outside the ring piece.
Everytime you crap, repeat. Give it a week or so and petey pile with go back up. Longer than this and you'll need to check it with the doctor. He's going to finger you. Just a warning.
Shower twice daily, if not more. Your hoop is open and as such you'll stink.
Generally, don't strain to crap. Don't sit on the pan reading, and crap when you need to, don't hold it in.
There are permanent treatments for this issue, ranging from a surgeon tying elastic bands around them til the drop off, or lasering. Either way, you'll be on a table with your hole open. Try the above before the operation route. Do not try to band them yourself, you will bleed and likely do something terrible.
Enjoy!
Do the following, eat fruit / veg more regularly. Soft stools are better than trying to s
t a rock.Go buy Anusol suppositories and the cream as well. Get personal with yourself and finger a suppository up your hoop then apply the cream outside the ring piece.
Everytime you crap, repeat. Give it a week or so and petey pile with go back up. Longer than this and you'll need to check it with the doctor. He's going to finger you. Just a warning.
Shower twice daily, if not more. Your hoop is open and as such you'll stink.
Generally, don't strain to crap. Don't sit on the pan reading, and crap when you need to, don't hold it in.
There are permanent treatments for this issue, ranging from a surgeon tying elastic bands around them til the drop off, or lasering. Either way, you'll be on a table with your hole open. Try the above before the operation route. Do not try to band them yourself, you will bleed and likely do something terrible.
Enjoy!
Edited by wooden cowboy on Thursday 8th September 13:47
wooden cowboy said:
I had a work colleague who didn't know he had one, just thought he had a spot there so tried and tried to squeeze it. I cried with laughter when he told me knowing how painful they can be!!
Do the following, eat fruit / veg more regularly. Soft stools are better than trying to st a rock.
Go buy Anusol suppositories and the cream as well. Get personal with yourself and finger a suppository up your hoop then apply the cream outside the ring piece.
Everytime you crap, repeat. Give it a week or so and petey pile with go back up. Longer than this and you'll need to check it with the doctor. He's going to finger you. Just a warning.
Shower twice daily, if not more. Your hoop is open and as such you'll stink.
Generally, don't strain to crap. Don't sit on the pan reading, and crap when you need to, don't hold it in.
There are permanent treatments for this issue, ranging from a surgeon tying elastic bands around them til the drop off, or lasering. Either way, you'll be on a table with your hole open. Try the above before the operation route. Do not try to band them yourself, you will bleed and likely do something terrible.
Enjoy!
I'm sat in the office virtually in tears of laughter getting some really odd looks. Thank you, please post more.Do the following, eat fruit / veg more regularly. Soft stools are better than trying to s
t a rock.Go buy Anusol suppositories and the cream as well. Get personal with yourself and finger a suppository up your hoop then apply the cream outside the ring piece.
Everytime you crap, repeat. Give it a week or so and petey pile with go back up. Longer than this and you'll need to check it with the doctor. He's going to finger you. Just a warning.
Shower twice daily, if not more. Your hoop is open and as such you'll stink.
Generally, don't strain to crap. Don't sit on the pan reading, and crap when you need to, don't hold it in.
There are permanent treatments for this issue, ranging from a surgeon tying elastic bands around them til the drop off, or lasering. Either way, you'll be on a table with your hole open. Try the above before the operation route. Do not try to band them yourself, you will bleed and likely do something terrible.
Enjoy!
Edited by wooden cowboy on Thursday 8th September 13:47
wooden cowboy said:
I had a work colleague who didn't know he had one, just thought he had a spot there so tried and tried to squeeze it. I cried with laughter when he told me knowing how painful they can be!!
Do the following, eat fruit / veg more regularly. Soft stools are better than trying to st a rock.
Go buy Anusol suppositories and the cream as well. Get personal with yourself and finger a suppository up your hoop then apply the cream outside the ring piece.
Everytime you crap, repeat. Give it a week or so and petey pile with go back up. Longer than this and you'll need to check it with the doctor. He's going to finger you. Just a warning.
Shower twice daily, if not more. Your hoop is open and as such you'll stink.
Generally, don't strain to crap. Don't sit on the pan reading, and crap when you need to, don't hold it in.
There are permanent treatments for this issue, ranging from a surgeon tying elastic bands around them til the drop off, or lasering. Either way, you'll be on a table with your hole open. Try the above before the operation route. Do not try to band them yourself, you will bleed and likely do something terrible.
Enjoy!
Good advice succinctly put. I generally get them when i am travelling due to Olympic levels of imbibing and generally not looking after myself, whisk(e)y is the red rag to my particular bull. The suppositories work an absolute treat. Do the following, eat fruit / veg more regularly. Soft stools are better than trying to s
t a rock.Go buy Anusol suppositories and the cream as well. Get personal with yourself and finger a suppository up your hoop then apply the cream outside the ring piece.
Everytime you crap, repeat. Give it a week or so and petey pile with go back up. Longer than this and you'll need to check it with the doctor. He's going to finger you. Just a warning.
Shower twice daily, if not more. Your hoop is open and as such you'll stink.
Generally, don't strain to crap. Don't sit on the pan reading, and crap when you need to, don't hold it in.
There are permanent treatments for this issue, ranging from a surgeon tying elastic bands around them til the drop off, or lasering. Either way, you'll be on a table with your hole open. Try the above before the operation route. Do not try to band them yourself, you will bleed and likely do something terrible.
Enjoy!
Edited by wooden cowboy on Thursday 8th September 13:47
Try to avoid any operation if possible, I had the rubber band one, let me tell you it f***** HURT !!!! It felt like his arm was in up to his elbow, once I'd opened up wide he opened it further and I couldn't help but let one rip, I suppose it wasn't the first time for him doing that job.
When it was over I couldn't stand up so I was told to lie down for a while and recover, after a while they had to move me to a side room because there were others waiting, so I had a nurse under each arm supporting me as I was walked past all the other patients waiting to go in
I'm not sure I would have stuck around if I'd been sat there.
Good balanced diet, fruit, veg etc
Never again !!
I had to have a follow up appointment where i was asked to drop my trousers and get on the bench, i refused and that was the end of that.
When it was over I couldn't stand up so I was told to lie down for a while and recover, after a while they had to move me to a side room because there were others waiting, so I had a nurse under each arm supporting me as I was walked past all the other patients waiting to go in
I'm not sure I would have stuck around if I'd been sat there.
Good balanced diet, fruit, veg etc
Never again !!
I had to have a follow up appointment where i was asked to drop my trousers and get on the bench, i refused and that was the end of that.
Gassing Station | Health Matters | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff