BPD parent

[CX53]

Just wondering what else i could try here before i actually disown my own mother.

I am mentally and physically exhausted by this demanding, violent and horrible person. The only way forward i can see is by cutting off contact and not helping any more. It ruined my teenage years and now it's ruining my twenties, my work and my relationship.

I feel so selfish but all I'm asking for is a normal and balanced life instead of feeling on edgr 24/7 waiting for the next drama, demand, kicking off or whatever.

Of course on a good day shes a normal lovely person, but on the frequent bad days/weeks I just cant cope. It doesn't help I am the only family member/support, but i can't dedicate my life to being a carer for someone who a. Doesn't really need it and b. Will make me ill myself.

She wont get any more help and the doctors and nhs have been useless. I'm just worried if i stop talking to her that she will force herself to have another break down / go into hospital for attention or just plain wont cope.

Anyone with experience of BPD have any ideas?

Sorry this sounds like a rant/agony aunt column but I dont know where else to go.

Thanks

[redddraggon]

I have a similar issue with my mother. I was going to post a similar story to you.

My story is complicated by my ASD, my mother being physically unwell (bowel cancer and a tonne of complications), my dad in end of life care, me living over an hour away, and me having a nearly equally crazy girlfriend.

Hopefully this will act as a little bump for you OP.

[Riley Blue]

OP, I see you're in Northamptonshire. Are you in touch with Northamptonshire Carers? They should be able to offer you help and support:

https://www.northamptonshire-carers.org/Pages/Cate...

[Jonmx]

There are a number of support organisations such as MIND who may be able to help. My sister has BPD so I know the struggle it can present. Have you had a look on the bpdworld.org website, lots of information on there that may be able to help.