I don’t know what’s wrong with me
Discussion
First of all, this is a serious thread and although I may sound like an over reacting idiot but I don’t know where else to go.
I’ve always suffered mentally, in awkward ways, I just don’t know what’s wrong with me.
- I suffer from constant deja vu, as if everything i see happened last week. My brain feels scrambled.
- I’ve become severely obsessive over things in the past few months. I find myself hoovering all the time, even when there’s nothing to hoover.
- Have become socially reclusive. Find myself avoiding contact outside of work - rejecting all social events.
- Started to hate the outside. This thread stemmed from the fact that I went on a trip to the nature reserve today and felt I needed to go home almost immediately after I left the car. The woods now make me feel uncomfortable and angry, but I don’t know why, or how. My wife was very pissed off.
- Ocassional depression.
- Irrational fear of things. In the past few years I have become incredibly scared of insects. When ever I come in to contact I feel as if I’ve being attacked by an axe murderer. I never used to mind insects until a few years ago; but I don’t remember an event that triggered this. I hate myself for this. Whenever I see an ant I feel I have to crush the entire colony; and every day I check for ants until I am satisfied.
- Paranoia. I always feel like I’m being followed.
- Delusions. I see things that no one else can see. I also hear ramblings in my head that make no sense.
- Anger issues. A few years ago I was prone to constant fits of rage. Small things could set me off in to shouting. I was involved in an incident at work that ended up in me very nearly being sacked.
My friends and family do not understand me, and I am beginning to become emotionally withdrawn and depressed. I am constantly referred to as “the mental” and that “I have a screw loose” in jest, but this only makes me more upset.
Men never cry, right?
I’ve always suffered mentally, in awkward ways, I just don’t know what’s wrong with me.
- I suffer from constant deja vu, as if everything i see happened last week. My brain feels scrambled.
- I’ve become severely obsessive over things in the past few months. I find myself hoovering all the time, even when there’s nothing to hoover.
- Have become socially reclusive. Find myself avoiding contact outside of work - rejecting all social events.
- Started to hate the outside. This thread stemmed from the fact that I went on a trip to the nature reserve today and felt I needed to go home almost immediately after I left the car. The woods now make me feel uncomfortable and angry, but I don’t know why, or how. My wife was very pissed off.
- Ocassional depression.
- Irrational fear of things. In the past few years I have become incredibly scared of insects. When ever I come in to contact I feel as if I’ve being attacked by an axe murderer. I never used to mind insects until a few years ago; but I don’t remember an event that triggered this. I hate myself for this. Whenever I see an ant I feel I have to crush the entire colony; and every day I check for ants until I am satisfied.
- Paranoia. I always feel like I’m being followed.
- Delusions. I see things that no one else can see. I also hear ramblings in my head that make no sense.
- Anger issues. A few years ago I was prone to constant fits of rage. Small things could set me off in to shouting. I was involved in an incident at work that ended up in me very nearly being sacked.
My friends and family do not understand me, and I am beginning to become emotionally withdrawn and depressed. I am constantly referred to as “the mental” and that “I have a screw loose” in jest, but this only makes me more upset.
Men never cry, right?
Go and see your GP and soon. PH will give you any amount of moral support but it is not the place for a mental health diagnosis. You have done the hard part by writing this down and posting it. Now look after yourself by getting the clinical diagnosis and support that will see you on the road to well-being
GP and referral to mental health services, do it tomorrow.
No one should think less of you, infact these days people are often very supportive.
From my complete not expert opinion sounds a bit of schizophrenia.
Main thing is, it can be treated and you've taken the first step, keep talking
Good luck
No one should think less of you, infact these days people are often very supportive.
From my complete not expert opinion sounds a bit of schizophrenia.
Main thing is, it can be treated and you've taken the first step, keep talking
Good luck
Please urgently get some help.
When things start to go wrong it's hard to unscramble things in your own mind. I was lucky to have an amazing GP who put me straight in to my local system when things started to go wrong for me a couple of years ago. If You need someone to talk to, and you're not in the mood for Samaritans, PM me with a phone number.
When things start to go wrong it's hard to unscramble things in your own mind. I was lucky to have an amazing GP who put me straight in to my local system when things started to go wrong for me a couple of years ago. If You need someone to talk to, and you're not in the mood for Samaritans, PM me with a phone number.
ClaphamGT3 said:
Go and see your GP and soon. PH will give you any amount of moral support but it is not the place for a mental health diagnosis. You have done the hard part by writing this down and posting it. Now look after yourself by getting the clinical diagnosis and support that will see you on the road to well-being
this x1000 be open to all kinds of diagnoses as well , even ones which might initially horrify you due to societal conditioning
sleepera6 said:
Dear all
I have contacted the Samaritans. I am going to keep this secret from my family. As I come from an Asian background I am afraid I will be treated like s
t. I will keep PH informed. Honestly, I am so grateful I am on this forum. It’s nice to know plenty of people care.
You've probably made the hardest step admitting it to yourself I have contacted the Samaritans. I am going to keep this secret from my family. As I come from an Asian background I am afraid I will be treated like s
t. I will keep PH informed. Honestly, I am so grateful I am on this forum. It’s nice to know plenty of people care.But go to your GP, they won't tell anyone (tell your families you have a persistent cough, or you need to get up several times in the night if you need some sort of excuse)
Our youngest had some problems two years ago, GP was brilliant (not that we found out until sometime later). Go, and this time next year you will probably looking back and thinking how much better life is.
Gary C said:
You've probably made the hardest step admitting it to yourself
But go to your GP, they won't tell anyone (tell your families you have a persistent cough, or you need to get up several times in the night if you need some sort of excuse)
Our youngest had some problems two years ago, GP was brilliant (not that we found out until sometime later). Go, and this time next year you will probably looking back and thinking how much better life is.
i agree totally with Gary's comments But go to your GP, they won't tell anyone (tell your families you have a persistent cough, or you need to get up several times in the night if you need some sort of excuse)
Our youngest had some problems two years ago, GP was brilliant (not that we found out until sometime later). Go, and this time next year you will probably looking back and thinking how much better life is.
Anxiety and Depression is something I've battled myself and I agree with those saying talk to your GP, recognising you have a problem is hard so you've taken the toughest step, so take some solace in that.
Take a look at this and ask for a referral
https://www.talk2gether.nhs.uk/
Take a look at this and ask for a referral
https://www.talk2gether.nhs.uk/
Samaritans is a good first step because talking to anyone at all about this stuff is a positive step, but the most likely source of lasting help is a doctor - your doctor.
A thing to have a think about - I'm on the autistic spectrum, right at the "top" end of the scale. It's not immediately apparent to anyone that I have the difficulties I do. And one of the things that comes with is anxiety - but alongside that, or maybe a part of it, I can never decide, is difficulty with new things and a powerful draw to stick with the familiar. Going out, finding it difficult, wanting to go home and then having a really adamant sense that I do not want a second try at going to that place is a pretty common experience for me. I've developed a small repertoire of tricks that help a bit - following a routine, having some food (and making that food either a packed lunch of favourites or a pre-planned meal out, usually) all help. Taking the van rather than going by public transport is a good trick too as knowing I can make a quick getaway reduces the likelihood that I'll get anxious enough to actually need to.
Some of the things you describe sound kinda familiar to me. So that's maybe a possibility, especially if some of the things you experience are very long term.
Do go and talk to a medic. They may offer medication to try, probably an SSRI, selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor. They work by getting your brain to make better use of the serotonin (the "happy hormone") it produces - a lot of people are dealing with anxiety and depression as a double whammy, and of course helping with one makes it easier to tackle the other. If they suggest it, give it a go. It might help a lot.
Very very best of luck.
A thing to have a think about - I'm on the autistic spectrum, right at the "top" end of the scale. It's not immediately apparent to anyone that I have the difficulties I do. And one of the things that comes with is anxiety - but alongside that, or maybe a part of it, I can never decide, is difficulty with new things and a powerful draw to stick with the familiar. Going out, finding it difficult, wanting to go home and then having a really adamant sense that I do not want a second try at going to that place is a pretty common experience for me. I've developed a small repertoire of tricks that help a bit - following a routine, having some food (and making that food either a packed lunch of favourites or a pre-planned meal out, usually) all help. Taking the van rather than going by public transport is a good trick too as knowing I can make a quick getaway reduces the likelihood that I'll get anxious enough to actually need to.
Some of the things you describe sound kinda familiar to me. So that's maybe a possibility, especially if some of the things you experience are very long term.
Do go and talk to a medic. They may offer medication to try, probably an SSRI, selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor. They work by getting your brain to make better use of the serotonin (the "happy hormone") it produces - a lot of people are dealing with anxiety and depression as a double whammy, and of course helping with one makes it easier to tackle the other. If they suggest it, give it a go. It might help a lot.
Very very best of luck.
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