Discussion
Sorry to hear this. My wife went through this some years ago. As has been said, early detection is key. Wife has been ok for about 20 years now Treatment has improved no end and seems not to be as serious as some years ago.
Good luck going forward, thoughts with you both.
As a bloke it can be difficult to know how to react. My wife described it as character building. Really need to stay strong and positive. Easier said than done I know but it really does help.
Good luck going forward, thoughts with you both.
As a bloke it can be difficult to know how to react. My wife described it as character building. Really need to stay strong and positive. Easier said than done I know but it really does help.
I'm sorry to hear your news.
I think it does depend on how early the cancer is caught and to an extent the type of cancer.
I lost my Mum to breast cancer last year; she had what's known as "triple negative", meaning hormonal based treatments weren't an option. It spread and although she put up a hell of a fight, there was nothing more that could be done. She was in her late 70s.
That being said, my auntie and cousin (on my Mum's side) have both come through breast cancer and have been cancer free for several years (10+).
Breast cancer seems to be statistically more survivable these days and I'd like to offer my very best wishes to your wife/partner for her treatment.
I think it does depend on how early the cancer is caught and to an extent the type of cancer.
I lost my Mum to breast cancer last year; she had what's known as "triple negative", meaning hormonal based treatments weren't an option. It spread and although she put up a hell of a fight, there was nothing more that could be done. She was in her late 70s.
That being said, my auntie and cousin (on my Mum's side) have both come through breast cancer and have been cancer free for several years (10+).
Breast cancer seems to be statistically more survivable these days and I'd like to offer my very best wishes to your wife/partner for her treatment.
I know your situation only too well.
If the cancer is confirmed then expect surgery, 6 months of chemo and radiotherapy but not necessarily in that order.
The treatment is, hopefully, only temporarily life-changing but it does make you sit up and take notice of what is important.
For your wife the chemo will normally be administered in 3 weekly cycles. Week 1 after a dose is normally a bit crap, second week is better and things are almost normal during week 3 before it all starts again.
As another poster has said the outcomes for breast cancer these days is pretty good if caught early and there is no secondary cancer.
Your oncologist will put together a detailed plan and there will be a huge amount of support provided. Everything will be explained at length. Take full advantage of the support offered; it really does help with coming to terms with this disease.
Welcome to the parallel universe of cancer. Above all, keep a positive outlook and give your wife the support she will need as she starts to lose her hair and suffers any number of other reactions to chemo therapy.
Best wishes to both of you.
If the cancer is confirmed then expect surgery, 6 months of chemo and radiotherapy but not necessarily in that order.
The treatment is, hopefully, only temporarily life-changing but it does make you sit up and take notice of what is important.
For your wife the chemo will normally be administered in 3 weekly cycles. Week 1 after a dose is normally a bit crap, second week is better and things are almost normal during week 3 before it all starts again.
As another poster has said the outcomes for breast cancer these days is pretty good if caught early and there is no secondary cancer.
Your oncologist will put together a detailed plan and there will be a huge amount of support provided. Everything will be explained at length. Take full advantage of the support offered; it really does help with coming to terms with this disease.
Welcome to the parallel universe of cancer. Above all, keep a positive outlook and give your wife the support she will need as she starts to lose her hair and suffers any number of other reactions to chemo therapy.
Best wishes to both of you.
It really does depend on which breast cancer she has, there are over ten variations all with different treatment regimes and different outcomes.
It is one of the cancers which has lots of research and lots of funding so outcomes are improving all the time.
Don’t underestimate the effects of treatment, drugs like Tomoxifen have some unpleasant side effects in some women.
Once she has a firm diagnosis both Cancer Research and Macmillan are a good source of information.
Take advantage of all the support you can, much of this is included in your ‘welcome to cancer pack’
If she goes through chemotherapy, again its it can be very variable depending on which drugs she has, FEC and TEC are well tolerated, but she should take the anti sickness meds regardless as getting on top of the sickness is harder than preventing.
Steroids are a b
h, she needs to be prepared for the weight gain and the chemo moon face.
Comfortable clothing on chemo days are essential, along with warm socks and blanket if her infusions are going to be over several hours, I found sipping ginger tea and sherbet lemons helped. If she doesn’t have a port fitted, then get her to ask for a heat pad prior to cannulation as it will make that more bearable.
Buy a good thermometer, monitoring your temperature in the days after chemo is essential for early detection of an infection due to low white blood cell count.
I won’t tell you to stay strong, it’s absolutely fine not to be ok at any point during this, I would say instead, talk openly and honestly and listen to what she needs, it’s different for everyone.
She is welcome to read my blog (link in profile) or send me a message via Macmillan if she needs an ear.
It is one of the cancers which has lots of research and lots of funding so outcomes are improving all the time.
Don’t underestimate the effects of treatment, drugs like Tomoxifen have some unpleasant side effects in some women.
Once she has a firm diagnosis both Cancer Research and Macmillan are a good source of information.
Take advantage of all the support you can, much of this is included in your ‘welcome to cancer pack’
If she goes through chemotherapy, again its it can be very variable depending on which drugs she has, FEC and TEC are well tolerated, but she should take the anti sickness meds regardless as getting on top of the sickness is harder than preventing.
Steroids are a b
h, she needs to be prepared for the weight gain and the chemo moon face.Comfortable clothing on chemo days are essential, along with warm socks and blanket if her infusions are going to be over several hours, I found sipping ginger tea and sherbet lemons helped. If she doesn’t have a port fitted, then get her to ask for a heat pad prior to cannulation as it will make that more bearable.
Buy a good thermometer, monitoring your temperature in the days after chemo is essential for early detection of an infection due to low white blood cell count.
I won’t tell you to stay strong, it’s absolutely fine not to be ok at any point during this, I would say instead, talk openly and honestly and listen to what she needs, it’s different for everyone.
She is welcome to read my blog (link in profile) or send me a message via Macmillan if she needs an ear.
eybic said:
Sorry to hear your news.
I think the main thing is how quickly it's been found, there are very good survival rates for Breast Cancer if found early.
Please read the above and don't focus on any of the negatives or proposed treatments until you at least have a confirmed 'staging' from the oncology team. I think the main thing is how quickly it's been found, there are very good survival rates for Breast Cancer if found early.
Already posters are talking chemo, operations etc from experience possibly jumping the gun.
My mum and her neighbour both had BC in their early 60's over 10 years ago both low grade early stages, Small OP job (not big), radio blasts and possibly tamoxifen or other drugs, "easily" do-able but upsetting at times.
My late wife had a very advanced/terminal stage when diagnosed and did "the full works" and survived several years.
You will be all over the place, especially your missus for a while but PLEASE don't focus on the negatives, here's hoping you get the best possible diagnosis, treatment and outcome
As others have stated there is lots of support and Breast cancer care were excellent at all times.
Tumbler's advice on a thermometer is very important. A good Braun ear thermometer regularly used before during and after establishes a norm for a person. Each measurement method gives slightly different results so get a base figure for her while she's well because neutropaenic sepsis can kill very very quickly. If, God forbid, the diagnosis is for Ca-breast then chemo virtually destroys the immune system for a while and can allow opportunistic infections to run riot. A lady close to me had her first diagnosis of lobular carcinoma in situ in 1997 and while the road has been variously rough and smooth, she's still here and well. Good Luck.
The future holds what the future holds.
My wife went through breast cancer last year and has come out of it stronger than before. Everyone is different and how they react to the drugs etc. is different. Whilst it is hard you need to stay positive and whilst you need to take each day as it comes it doesn't harm to have some goals (easy ones though, no plans to run the London Marathon etc)
amongst all of what is going on you also need to make some time for you.
Good luck to you and your wife and don't be afraid to ask for help.
My wife went through breast cancer last year and has come out of it stronger than before. Everyone is different and how they react to the drugs etc. is different. Whilst it is hard you need to stay positive and whilst you need to take each day as it comes it doesn't harm to have some goals (easy ones though, no plans to run the London Marathon etc)
amongst all of what is going on you also need to make some time for you.
Good luck to you and your wife and don't be afraid to ask for help.
anonymous said:
[redacted]
Did they say 'radium' or radiotherapy treatment? Brachytherapy is used for prostate cancer and that involves radiation sources (isotopes) injected locally in the area, but I haven't seen that for Ca breast. IANAD but a relative of a patient. Good Luck, whatever.She will likely have 5 cycles, this will be 5 days each Monday to Friday with weekends off.
Comfortable easy to get off clothing, as she will have to change into a gown.
They will give her a prescription for any soreness she may get during treatment, it looks a little like sunburn.
Look to change to deodorant rather than antiperspirant.
She will be tired, the effects are cumulative.
She and you will get through this, be kind to each other, don’t treat her with kid gloves, just be mindful, let her take the lead, if she wants to cook dinner, let her, if she doesn’t, have a stash of things in the freezer/fridge that are easy and quick.
Hospital parking charges, usually you get some sort of exemption pre payment, use it, even if you don’t need the financial help, I donated the saving to my preferred charity, which felt like I was making a difference.
Make a choice about how much you want to share with your nearest and dearest and those further a field, this really needs to be a joint decision that you are both comfortable with.
My husband had access to mental health support via work, which he used and was a great help, it also benefited me as I knew he had someone to discuss his fears with at a time when my head space was rather full.
Comfortable easy to get off clothing, as she will have to change into a gown.
They will give her a prescription for any soreness she may get during treatment, it looks a little like sunburn.
Look to change to deodorant rather than antiperspirant.
She will be tired, the effects are cumulative.
She and you will get through this, be kind to each other, don’t treat her with kid gloves, just be mindful, let her take the lead, if she wants to cook dinner, let her, if she doesn’t, have a stash of things in the freezer/fridge that are easy and quick.
Hospital parking charges, usually you get some sort of exemption pre payment, use it, even if you don’t need the financial help, I donated the saving to my preferred charity, which felt like I was making a difference.
Make a choice about how much you want to share with your nearest and dearest and those further a field, this really needs to be a joint decision that you are both comfortable with.
My husband had access to mental health support via work, which he used and was a great help, it also benefited me as I knew he had someone to discuss his fears with at a time when my head space was rather full.
motco said:
anonymous said:
[redacted]
Did they say 'radium' or radiotherapy treatment? Brachytherapy is used for prostate cancer and that involves radiation sources (isotopes) injected locally in the area, but I haven't seen that for Ca breast. IANAD but a relative of a patient. Good Luck, whatever.I went through this with Mrs T about 6 years ago.
We found the first few days after diagnosis was the worst, after that it did get a lot easier.
The worst thing was telling our daughters and close friends.
I'm not going to bang on about how you will both get through the other side. Just that you are not alone and Mrs T and myself are thinking of you both.
We found the first few days after diagnosis was the worst, after that it did get a lot easier.
The worst thing was telling our daughters and close friends.
I'm not going to bang on about how you will both get through the other side. Just that you are not alone and Mrs T and myself are thinking of you both.
Tumbler said:
anonymous said:
[redacted]
Whilst not ideal they do stop the pity head tilt, she will become familiar with this.M & S do a range of bras to hold it in place and stop it chafing.
Do you know which breast cancer?
My Mum went through this probably in her early 70's with a stage 4 cancer, due to her age chemo wasn't an option so she had radio therapy and tamoxifen for 5 years after. Still with us in her mid 80's.
One thing she didn't expect was to get tattooed on the NHS, 3 very small discrete marks to help line her up for the radio therapy machine. She was also lucky that she got on a trial to have the treatment once a week instead of 5 days a week.
Do be aware that the skin can become sore similar to sunburn due to the treatment and having someone to drive her to appointments helps a lot, she has enough on her mind.
Best of luck.
One thing she didn't expect was to get tattooed on the NHS, 3 very small discrete marks to help line her up for the radio therapy machine. She was also lucky that she got on a trial to have the treatment once a week instead of 5 days a week.
Do be aware that the skin can become sore similar to sunburn due to the treatment and having someone to drive her to appointments helps a lot, she has enough on her mind.
Best of luck.
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