Wife, libido and now
Author
Discussion

waynedear

Original Poster:

2,351 posts

194 months

Sunday 2nd November 2025
quotequote all
Evening all, my wife is 61, still hot and lovely.
She had a terrible menopause... Until she got the HRT stuff, which helped.
She is pretty much over it now.
Around 4 months ago she noticed something, kept it to herself.
Losing the feelings, downstairs, front door... Now it appears to be in a coma of sorts.
She has tried experimenting (in secret with toys) without success... Not a crescendo anywhere.
As a couple we tried last night and have now discussed.
lovely feelings, LOVELY FEELINGS, HERE WE GO.... dead..
Anyone's wife had the same... Any great developments after time ??
I know what she is feeling, when they put me on anti depressants for nerve pain a much loved part of me died... After 4/5 months it came back.

StevieBee

15,150 posts

282 months

Monday 3rd November 2025
quotequote all
Wife is 55 and very much in the same category as yours.

In fairness, she was never rampant but we have both made peace with the fact that Mrs Libido has left the room.

And you know what, it doesn't matter (to us, at least). We do occasionally indulge but I am very aware the pleasure is one sided.


DaffyT4

172 posts

166 months

Monday 3rd November 2025
quotequote all
Wife is 59, libido declined through her 40s then the menopause hit. Went on HRT, no change.

But, then she read about testosterone - got a blood test from GP and was found to be at the very bottom of the range. Got prescribed testosterone and....well, now I can hardly keep up. It really has been a game changer, not just with libido but general sense of well being. I would certainly suggest a conversation with the GP as a starting point.

DSMSMR

1,006 posts

16 months

Monday 3rd November 2025
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my wife is now 65 and has been sexually dead for 10 years.............I am not!

ChocolateFrog

34,954 posts

200 months

Monday 3rd November 2025
quotequote all
Probably way, way more common than most people would think.

Childbirth and children in general seems to kill interest as much as menopause.

StevieBee

15,150 posts

282 months

Monday 3rd November 2025
quotequote all
DaffyT4 said:
But, then she read about testosterone - got a blood test from GP and was found to be at the very bottom of the range. Got prescribed testosterone and....well, now I can hardly keep up. It really has been a game changer, not just with libido but general sense of well being. I would certainly suggest a conversation with the GP as a starting point.
Don't find her bks get in the way, though? smile

Hoofy

79,832 posts

309 months

Monday 3rd November 2025
quotequote all
DaffyT4 said:
Wife is 59, libido declined through her 40s then the menopause hit. Went on HRT, no change.

But, then she read about testosterone - got a blood test from GP and was found to be at the very bottom of the range. Got prescribed testosterone and....well, now I can hardly keep up. It really has been a game changer, not just with libido but general sense of well being. I would certainly suggest a conversation with the GP as a starting point.
I was going to mention testosterone.

It could also help if OPer's wife tried strength training in the gym. I understand that promotes testosterone generation?

Also, if she's depressed, that can affect things so how's her mental health?

ComStrike

509 posts

120 months

Monday 3rd November 2025
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Very common but not spoken about much
Mines has just turned 50 & tap is off but she does try,
Menopause has a lot to do with it

waynedear

Original Poster:

2,351 posts

194 months

Monday 3rd November 2025
quotequote all
Brilliant, thank you all for the comments.
Jules has mentioned testosterone, she is unsure as there is a chance of unwanted hair, apart from her head she has very little in the way of body hair.
She is terrified of waking and finding... In her words " huge hag hairs growing from her chin"
Women eh, you have to love em.

westberks

1,399 posts

162 months

Monday 10th November 2025
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waynedear said:
Brilliant, thank you all for the comments.
Jules has mentioned testosterone, she is unsure as there is a chance of unwanted hair, apart from her head she has very little in the way of body hair.
She is terrified of waking and finding... In her words " huge hag hairs growing from her chin"
Women eh, you have to love em.
there are so many hair removal treatments that it shouldn't prevent her dealing with her overall well being. My GF is 56 and had pretty much the lot lasered and the 'grow back' is minimal if at all

Woodrow Wilson

391 posts

187 months

Thursday 13th November 2025
quotequote all
waynedear said:
Evening all, my wife is 61, still hot and lovely.
She had a terrible menopause... Until she got the HRT stuff, which helped.
She is pretty much over it now.
Around 4 months ago she noticed something, kept it to herself.
Losing the feelings, downstairs, front door... Now it appears to be in a coma of sorts.
She has tried experimenting (in secret with toys) without success... Not a crescendo anywhere.
As a couple we tried last night and have now discussed.
lovely feelings, LOVELY FEELINGS, HERE WE GO.... dead..
Anyone's wife had the same... Any great developments after time ??
I know what she is feeling, when they put me on anti depressants for nerve pain a much loved part of me died... After 4/5 months it came back.
Your wife had a loss of libido 61? Count yourself lucky.

She went 20+ years longer than some women, allegedly....

Dog Biscuit

2,388 posts

24 months

Thursday 13th November 2025
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ThingsBehindTheSun said:
Woodrow Wilson said:
Your wife had a loss of libido 61? Count yourself lucky.

She went 20+ years longer than some women, allegedly....
When I was on dating sites in around 2014 I met a lot of women in their lates 30s early 40s who had recently separated. Every single one of them was absolutely gagging for it, and usually seeing and sleeping with multiple men at the same time.

I am sure they had told their husbands they had lost interest in sex, when the reality was they had lost interest in having sex with them. Once separated, they would be having sex with someone they had literally met two hours previously and be doing this a couple of times a week.

Going to sex parties, being on Fab Swingers, hooking up with guys in their 20s and thinking they are a cougar, I have seen it all. These are women who would not have even touched their husbands in years.
Well I'm sure that contribution will help settle the OP no end. Nice one wink

Woodrow Wilson

391 posts

187 months

Thursday 13th November 2025
quotequote all
ThingsBehindTheSun said:
Woodrow Wilson said:
Your wife had a loss of libido 61? Count yourself lucky.

She went 20+ years longer than some women, allegedly....
When I was on dating sites in around 2014 I met a lot of women in their lates 30s early 40s who had recently separated. Every single one of them was absolutely gagging for it, and usually seeing and sleeping with multiple men at the same time.

I am sure they had told their husbands they had lost interest in sex, when the reality was they had lost interest in having sex with them. Once separated, they would be having sex with someone they had literally met two hours previously and be doing this a couple of times a week.

Going to sex parties, being on Fab Swingers, hooking up with guys in their 20s and thinking they are a cougar, I have seen it all. These are women who would not have even touched their husbands in years.
I don't doubt it.

(although they were a self-selecting group)

Woodrow Wilson

391 posts

187 months

Thursday 13th November 2025
quotequote all
Dog Biscuit said:
ThingsBehindTheSun said:
Woodrow Wilson said:
Your wife had a loss of libido 61? Count yourself lucky.

She went 20+ years longer than some women, allegedly....
When I was on dating sites in around 2014 I met a lot of women in their lates 30s early 40s who had recently separated. Every single one of them was absolutely gagging for it, and usually seeing and sleeping with multiple men at the same time.

I am sure they had told their husbands they had lost interest in sex, when the reality was they had lost interest in having sex with them. Once separated, they would be having sex with someone they had literally met two hours previously and be doing this a couple of times a week.

Going to sex parties, being on Fab Swingers, hooking up with guys in their 20s and thinking they are a cougar, I have seen it all. These are women who would not have even touched their husbands in years.
Well I'm sure that contribution will help settle the OP no end. Nice one wink
laugh

CMTMB

1,588 posts

22 months

Thursday 13th November 2025
quotequote all
"They all do that, Sir".