Depression or Unhappiness - advice please???

[qwerty123]

I'm not going to bore you with the details but for the past 6 months, quite a few things have happened in my life ranging from bereavement, family fall outs, bad friends, money and business troubles amongst many other things.

I've tried the 'shut up and deal with it' strategy as best as I can but it's all getting on top of me and I constantly feel unhappy to the point that it's demotivational towards anything I can try and do try and fix some of these problems. I hate feeling the way I do along with the sleepless nights, day in, day out.

I know there isn't a right or wrong way to advise me, but for anyone who has dealt with such life stumbling blocks, what is out there to help someone such as myself deal who feels the way I do. Should I go see my GP to see if there are medicines/drugs to help, or would I be better off seeing a psychologist/psychitrist? Are there any off the shelf drugs that can help? Do I target trying to get sleep? Should I try and get some councilling or even hypnotherapy?

Thank You.

[nevgroom]

Go and see your GP - Lacking motivation and disturbed sleeping can be related to depression (something I learned when dealing with a close family friend recently). Positive things can be done to alleviate your situation.

[Pommygranite]

Dr's>anti-anxiety tablets>counselling.

Might help you think with a clear mind.

Not seeking help and just bottling up/'just dealt with it mate' is not going to help you.

Clear head and a good few nights sleep will work wonders.

[GTIR]

You've made the first step in acknowledging the fact you have a problem by posting this thread. Things will start getting better from now on.

I think a visit to your doctor is in order.

[tonyvid]

A quick reply...go and have a chat with your GP, they may well have an in-house counsellor to chat to but it could be few weeks wait. The GP can do a quick verbal test to see where you are at emotionally and then go from there. It's all too easy to be put on anti-depressants as step one but it has been shown that talking therapies can be more effective. A-Ds very much have their place in giving you space to sort things out but they are a treatment for months, have a few iffy side-effects and can be a right bugger to get off.

This is a crap time of year, it's been gloomy as fk weather wise which might have not helped. St John's Wort is available over the counter to help improve your mood but check first if you have any underlying conditions or are on medication to start with.

Eat well, exercise and get some daylight. The sleep deprivation is a killer, there was a thread last week, or so, over in the Health forum.

Good luck with it all, it's horrid to feel like that(and many, many do)

[ukwill]

1. Exercise.
2. Exercise.
3. Exercise.

Oh, and did I say exercise?

You only need 30m 3x a week and you'll start feeling better. (imo).

[Speedracer329]

As others have said you need to see your GP. I would think the first thing to address would be your lack of sleep, the sooner you can get good quality, regular sleep, the better you will feel. It is not as easy as it sounds though, so the sooner you do it the better. Good luck.

[Psychobert]

Short term self help - eat properly, make sure you drink plenty of water and try to get some exercise - even if thats an extra 5 minutes each way out of your normal routine to walk to the sandwich shop etc.

GP for a referral to a counsellor is I think a good option, but I personally would try to avoid drug therapy. It can do wonders, but its also easy to get hooked. If you are not so keen on seeing the GP for a referral, try either the British Psychological Society or British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy - either of these will help you find a therapist in your local area. Very few people I know would not have benefitted from seeing a counsellor at some stage of their life, so don't be afraid to think about that option.

[Scrumper]

GP as others have said, but if you want a quick 'sticking plaster' to give you a lift in the meantime, try some exercise. It may sound trite but getting the blood pumping for 20-30 minutes two or three times a week provides an significant lift in your sense of general well being. You're not going to be walking around with singing birds perching on your shoulder dishing out love and goodwill like Jesus on MDMA, but you will notice a marked improvement in your ability to deal with stuff, you'll be more motivated and you'll be able to see the wood for the trees a bit more. You'll also sleep at night.

Whatever you do decide to do after you speak to your GP will also be that much more effective. Good luck.

[Davi]

to echo those above, go have a chat with your GP. They really can help. I didn't even know I was suffering clinical depression till my doc told me all the symptoms I went in with led to that conclusion, she was right. That's about as far as I'll go on a public forum but if you want to know any more feel free to email.

If anyone tells you to "man up" and "stop whinging" or anything like that just tt them in the balls and call them a .

[Mazdarese]

Exercise is great. I can go to the gym feeling miserable, and come back ready to take on the world (or a small continent. Well, maybe just Lichtenstein).

It's also probably worth going to see your GP for a chat. Yes, me may prescribe anti-depressants but think carefully before you start taking them as I believe some of them can be quite addictive.

What I would recommend, other than the exercise, is write down a list of things that are bothering you and formulate a realistic plan on how you will deal with each of them. You are possibly subconsciously worrying about things that you didn't realise?

[ukwill]

Definately dont start necking anti-depressants straight away. Just google "exercise for depression and anxiety" and see for yourself

[drivin_me_nuts]

.. agree with the above. Keep away from the drugs if you can. AD's have a place, that much is true, but there are other ways to deal with things when life comes along and smacks you hard in the balls. From the little you describe perhaps it's no wonder you are not at your best - but that in itself is a far cry from clinical depression - which is a label in itself that you really want to avoid.

[Muzzer]

Ask your GP to refer you to a counsellor. You'd be surprised how much talking about it helps.

Do this before taking any medication.

I'd echo the ideas about exercise aswell.

[YourNemisis]

What muzzer said stay away from medication! try to get active swimming running/jogging/biking fresh air.

[dave1409]

Yes, see your GP. Some are better than others for treating depression. If they do want to put you on tablets, they should tell you about the pros and cons of them (mine explained about a couple of different types she could prescribe for me),and how to deal with any side effects if you get them.

Mine also referred me for a course in managing depression, but that has only just started, over 14 months after referral, due to a huge waiting list.

I also agree that exercise can help, if you can motivate yourself to do it.

I also found that the tablets took eight or nine weeks before I started feeling better. I don't think there is usually a quick fix, you need to persevere. I stopped taking the tablets about a year ago as I am feeling better now.

I hope you start feeling better soon.
Dave

[KaraK]

I'd agree with what others have said really, avoid taking any medication as a "first step". This isn't because there is anything "wrong" about being on anti-depressants but just taking them might make you feel better initially but generally it isn't going to help long term, especially in your sort of scenario where your feelings of depression are almost certainly down to events in your life not just some biological imbalance out of the blue. IMO you need to start on a path to sorting things out and then if you need something to help you along then you can explore the pharmacutical options. Talk to your GP about counselling (it sounds a bit touchy feely but talking to the right counsellor can make a massive difference!), as others have said some regular exercise can work wonders for your general mood as it releases endorphins and there is the psychological benefit that you can get from having something structured to work at by setting yourselves training goals etc. It may or may not help with the sleeplessness, I know people who swear by it for that but for me personally I could run myself to exhaustion but still be unable to sleep with my mind racing etc.

On that note the lack of sleep is certain to be making things worse and it can be a viscous cycle where you can't sleep because you are stressed out which makes you more stressed and so on. The good news is that this can work in reverse as well, if you can take get a rung up the ladder towards feeling better you might get a good night or two's sleep - which in turn will make you feel even better.

[JonyTVR]

here have some of my prednisalone, I too have had a st 12months but high as a kite at the mo

sorry not much help, just try to find pleasure in little things, so easy to have some good things but just ignore them, things will get better, may never seem like it but it will.

I think I'd agree with the exercise idea though!

[tank slapper]

KaraK said:

I'd agree with what others have said really, avoid taking any medication as a "first step". This isn't because there is anything "wrong" about being on anti-depressants but just taking them might make you feel better initially but generally it isn't going to help long term, especially in your sort of scenario where your feelings of depression are almost certainly down to events in your life not just some biological imbalance out of the blue.

I don't think you can generalise like that. Anti-depressants can be a useful first step, but it depends on the situation, and only someone with suitable medical knowledge can make that assessment.

They aren't intended as a long term cure but as a means to take the pressure off - an analogy would be like using a crutch when you break a leg. It's not intended to be there permanently, just to allow you to move about while your leg heals, at which point you can throw it away and walk normally.

Edit - I have recommended this book on here before. It is really very good.

Edited by tank slapper on Monday 7th February 23:37

[klarky]

To echo everyone else go see your gp, I was in a similar position a year ago, I was more stress and depression but after a few months on anti anxiety pills and speaking to friends and family and sorting issues at work out I jacked the pills in at 6 months and touch wood been ok since, sure I have the occasional down day but even when things are really pissing me off I can control it, recognise the signs and not let it get to me.

I was dead against taking anything for depression at first, the pills took a month to have any affect but they did help me deal with things, for the first time in years I was going to bed, sleeping well, and waking up early full of energy. Now i Don't take them i still sleep well and have energy, just the initial waking up is a problem.

I have to agree some exercise is vital, just to get out and clear your head, I was walking the family dog and cycling a lot, really need to start again as I've been a bit lax of late.

Depression really isn't discussed, but it really needs to be. Looking back I've probably been depressed for all of my twenties, and it was at 29 when I actually acknowledged it and did something.

Good luck, that first doctors visit is the hardest, I'll admit it was a blubbering wreck, talking to a stranger about it is somehow easier, but it's the first step to getting better