Is it depression?
Discussion
I've had very little experience with things like depression, but I'm hoping you'll be able to give me some pointers on the below situation....
The gf and I have been together for about 6 years and had ups and downs as most couples but have on the whole been very close throughout. We had talked at length about the future, engagements and getting married, though in the future as we're both still in our early 20's.
However around Christmas time, she started being quite off with me and it eventually culminated in her going into a very low mental state where she basically cried for a couple of weeks. I should point out, she started being a bit off with me around the middle of December and was then let go from her recently started job in early Jan, after which she went into the aforementioned meltdown.
Since then, we've gone from speaking pretty much everyday and seeing each other a couple of times a week to a short terse conversation perhaps once a week and usually at my instigation. She seems in a bad mood generally and says she doesn't really feel anything for me. I know she has also not really spoken to some of her very close friends in weeks.
On a more long running note, she had applied for the second year in a row for a PGCE course place and it looks like she won't be able to go into teaching as she'd hoped to. She's had quite a lot of difficulty in finding work since leaving uni and in late 2010 had a very big bust up with one of her best friends, which I still don't think is resolved. She has also had some health issues over the last couple of years which Docs are having a hard time trying to figure out, so I think this may be getting her down also.
In the space of about 4-6 weeks, she has gone from being a very bubbly, happy and chatty person to being grumpy all the time. I don't understand how she she has gone from telling me she loved me constantly and wanted to get engaged to the current situation!!?!?!?
Sorry for the long rambling post, but I need to get it off my chest as much as anything, I would appreciate any thoughts and advice. I honestly thought, and still do think, that she is the one, but I don't have a clue how to fix this.
Thanks in advance.
The gf and I have been together for about 6 years and had ups and downs as most couples but have on the whole been very close throughout. We had talked at length about the future, engagements and getting married, though in the future as we're both still in our early 20's.
However around Christmas time, she started being quite off with me and it eventually culminated in her going into a very low mental state where she basically cried for a couple of weeks. I should point out, she started being a bit off with me around the middle of December and was then let go from her recently started job in early Jan, after which she went into the aforementioned meltdown.
Since then, we've gone from speaking pretty much everyday and seeing each other a couple of times a week to a short terse conversation perhaps once a week and usually at my instigation. She seems in a bad mood generally and says she doesn't really feel anything for me. I know she has also not really spoken to some of her very close friends in weeks.
On a more long running note, she had applied for the second year in a row for a PGCE course place and it looks like she won't be able to go into teaching as she'd hoped to. She's had quite a lot of difficulty in finding work since leaving uni and in late 2010 had a very big bust up with one of her best friends, which I still don't think is resolved. She has also had some health issues over the last couple of years which Docs are having a hard time trying to figure out, so I think this may be getting her down also.
In the space of about 4-6 weeks, she has gone from being a very bubbly, happy and chatty person to being grumpy all the time. I don't understand how she she has gone from telling me she loved me constantly and wanted to get engaged to the current situation!!?!?!?
Sorry for the long rambling post, but I need to get it off my chest as much as anything, I would appreciate any thoughts and advice. I honestly thought, and still do think, that she is the one, but I don't have a clue how to fix this.
Thanks in advance.
172ff said:
Sounds like she is or wants to be with someone else.
This is of course a possibility and one I'd be silly to ignore, but at this stage I don't think it's the case. The whole issue seems bigger then me (just that the relationship bit is what affects me) and somebody else on the scene wouldn't explain things like the meltdown.I should add, that she only really seems in touch with a couple of her cousins and 1 group of friends (all female from one of her old jobs). From what I know, she hasn't spoken much to her other mates. But it's difficult given she barely speaks to me to know for sure.
I guess depression seems to be likely and the symptoms I've described seem to tie in to that. But how do I get her to seek some help for this? I've suggested she may have depression on 2-3 occasions but she has flatly refused any suggestion she is depressed.
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