Vito, Marenello & Ferdinand's Demon Seed
Discussion
I am so knackered that in an attempt to prevent the onset of 
I am forcing myself to babble about the most innocuous, albeit vaguely interesting (in an anoraky sort of way) thing that happened, when I was forced to nip home in a works Merc Vito van, earlier today.
Not wanting to lose my prized parking space, a manic condition forced upon me by the anti-car zealots in the local council whose sole mission in life is to paint all over the roads in this barren nowvan waystlaand, I was forced to borrow said micro van from the Stuttgart connection.
I was immediately impressed by the incredibly comfortable driving position and sensible location of the gear lever, mounted from the superbly designed, angled dash, Civic Type-R style.
That this deisel was so incredibly quiet and smooth also blew me away - far more refined than the mud plugger of an LC 'er indoors uses.
Although no faster than the standard Sprinters I've used it felt quick enough, in a van stakes kinda way and utterly stable on the m-way; the wheel, rock solid in my coffee stained mits (no cup holders, damn scandal); it could've been an S-class.
The clutch felt miles smoother than the Sprinters though and the gearchange, whilst still possessing that similar notchiness found on it's big brother in my experience, was far less recalcitrant in it's actual stirrings through the box.
This is a profoundly tedious thread and I apologize unreservedly to those viewing it who otherwise, by now, might have expected a fitting tribute to a deserving commie of the week (perhaps one who resembled a petrified and proctologically challenged female frog) but instead get this tat.
Still, it gets slightly better because en route back to work I was privileged to witness 3 modern classics whose collective silhouettes and sounds made one, quite simply, moist.
In 1 {best Jim Bowen impression}, with xenons-a-blazing, was a simply delightful, 52-registered M3 Cabrio, snarling away from the lights and making me realize just what a snip this Munchen whippersnapper is for a paltry £38k.
In 2, and straight from the land of the mighty DAZREN, it could well have been the Ober-Nordschleifer himself; a coiled spring of insanely refined hedonism, and in the right silver shade too, an X plated 996TT.
{What ever next? A Countach, BB or Pantera?}
Well not quite but frankly nearly there and knocking on the door of firstportofcallafterlotterywinningism, a similarly painted 550M.
It could have been a 575 but I really didn't mind which it was. The shark had immense road prescence and dominated the environment. Quite possibly the classiest* motor money can buy.
(* Class, in this case being defined as a near perfect combo of breeding, restrained good looks that just don't have to try 'cos it knows who's the daddy, exquisite interior and pace from the Gods.)
And finally, to paraquote Jethro Tull, as seems to be the fashion these days -
"I see a ma-dras, on the horizon..."
I am forcing myself to babble about the most innocuous, albeit vaguely interesting (in an anoraky sort of way) thing that happened, when I was forced to nip home in a works Merc Vito van, earlier today. Not wanting to lose my prized parking space, a manic condition forced upon me by the anti-car zealots in the local council whose sole mission in life is to paint all over the roads in this barren nowvan waystlaand, I was forced to borrow said micro van from the Stuttgart connection.
I was immediately impressed by the incredibly comfortable driving position and sensible location of the gear lever, mounted from the superbly designed, angled dash, Civic Type-R style.
That this deisel was so incredibly quiet and smooth also blew me away - far more refined than the mud plugger of an LC 'er indoors uses.
Although no faster than the standard Sprinters I've used it felt quick enough, in a van stakes kinda way and utterly stable on the m-way; the wheel, rock solid in my coffee stained mits (no cup holders, damn scandal); it could've been an S-class.
The clutch felt miles smoother than the Sprinters though and the gearchange, whilst still possessing that similar notchiness found on it's big brother in my experience, was far less recalcitrant in it's actual stirrings through the box.
This is a profoundly tedious thread and I apologize unreservedly to those viewing it who otherwise, by now, might have expected a fitting tribute to a deserving commie of the week (perhaps one who resembled a petrified and proctologically challenged female frog) but instead get this tat.
Still, it gets slightly better because en route back to work I was privileged to witness 3 modern classics whose collective silhouettes and sounds made one, quite simply, moist.
In 1 {best Jim Bowen impression}, with xenons-a-blazing, was a simply delightful, 52-registered M3 Cabrio, snarling away from the lights and making me realize just what a snip this Munchen whippersnapper is for a paltry £38k.
In 2, and straight from the land of the mighty DAZREN, it could well have been the Ober-Nordschleifer himself; a coiled spring of insanely refined hedonism, and in the right silver shade too, an X plated 996TT.
{What ever next? A Countach, BB or Pantera?}
Well not quite but frankly nearly there and knocking on the door of firstportofcallafterlotterywinningism, a similarly painted 550M.
It could have been a 575 but I really didn't mind which it was. The shark had immense road prescence and dominated the environment. Quite possibly the classiest* motor money can buy.
(* Class, in this case being defined as a near perfect combo of breeding, restrained good looks that just don't have to try 'cos it knows who's the daddy, exquisite interior and pace from the Gods.)
And finally, to paraquote Jethro Tull, as seems to be the fashion these days -
"I see a ma-dras, on the horizon..."
I forgot to mention that I also happened upon a silver SL55 AMG for le premire fois too, yesterday.
You think Merc and are perhaps underwhelmed next to the trad super car makes but let me assure you, dear readers of the garb, that this metal stallion of the Teutons leaves you in no doubt about it's intent, as it rumbleth by.
What a helluva creation; it really is quite fabulous.
I demand somebody on here buys one and allows me the honour of a richly perverted zymol sesh therewith.
Btw, am I the only person who ever feels modestly
in the post-consumed haze of a not insignificant feast of Asian sub-continental origin?
You think Merc and are perhaps underwhelmed next to the trad super car makes but let me assure you, dear readers of the garb, that this metal stallion of the Teutons leaves you in no doubt about it's intent, as it rumbleth by.
What a helluva creation; it really is quite fabulous.
I demand somebody on here buys one and allows me the honour of a richly perverted zymol sesh therewith.
Btw, am I the only person who ever feels modestly
in the post-consumed haze of a not insignificant feast of Asian sub-continental origin? I would just like to second DeR's proposal that someone on here get a SL55 AMG. In anticipation I hereby put my name down on the passenger ride list.
DAZ
PS1 - An E55 AMG is also acceptable as are the V12 Brabus works of art. Go on, someone get spending!!
PS2 - Those Merc Vitos and sprinters are great. I've griven both in the last 12 months and leagues in front of a G reg transit I borrowed 3 years ago.
EDITED TO SAY - DeR, piccy now on profile.
>> Edited by dazren on Friday 13th December 11:08
DAZ
PS1 - An E55 AMG is also acceptable as are the V12 Brabus works of art. Go on, someone get spending!!
PS2 - Those Merc Vitos and sprinters are great. I've griven both in the last 12 months and leagues in front of a G reg transit I borrowed 3 years ago.
EDITED TO SAY - DeR, piccy now on profile.
>> Edited by dazren on Friday 13th December 11:08
DeR.
Any chance we could take the photo of ze beasts outside Number 10? Do you think Tony or two jags would mind?
DAZ
EDITED TO SAY - We would of course be there advising his Tonyness on transport issues. Also showing two jags how to throw a proper punch.
>> Edited by dazren on Friday 13th December 11:58
Any chance we could take the photo of ze beasts outside Number 10? Do you think Tony or two jags would mind?
DAZ
EDITED TO SAY - We would of course be there advising his Tonyness on transport issues. Also showing two jags how to throw a proper punch.
>> Edited by dazren on Friday 13th December 11:58
And of course, Herr Dazren, ve could help Big Ears plan our way out of Stalag Europe.
On the European question (sighs), what do sensible people like your good self think about Turkish entry into the Euro zone?
And back to the car, Daz, now that I've mopped up; it is just perfect. How satisfying KNOWING that you've got something THIS accomplished. The only other car that must deliver this much 'can't quite believe it myself' factor (for no more than circa £100k) must be a 360.
Bloody great. I demand you max it ce soir, in honour of Henry V and that Prussian bod that saved Wellsey's arse at Waterloo.
YYYYyyyyyyyeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!!!
On the European question (sighs), what do sensible people like your good self think about Turkish entry into the Euro zone?
And back to the car, Daz, now that I've mopped up; it is just perfect. How satisfying KNOWING that you've got something THIS accomplished. The only other car that must deliver this much 'can't quite believe it myself' factor (for no more than circa £100k) must be a 360.
Bloody great. I demand you max it ce soir, in honour of Henry V and that Prussian bod that saved Wellsey's arse at Waterloo.
YYYYyyyyyyyeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!!!
DeR.
I've managed to stay away from questions like that in the General Gassing Section, due to time constraints. However I'll give you a hint.
UTTER DISBELIEF.
Graham.
Excellent taste in one so young. My yearning started when I was twelve. If you ever see me at a PH meet come on over and I'll take you out for a blast.
cheers guys
DAZ
I've managed to stay away from questions like that in the General Gassing Section, due to time constraints. However I'll give you a hint.
UTTER DISBELIEF. Graham.
Excellent taste in one so young. My yearning started when I was twelve. If you ever see me at a PH meet come on over and I'll take you out for a blast.
cheers guys
DAZ
Daz, my yearning started when I was around 12, then when I did my work experience with porsche, that was it, my life has never been the same.
160mph never is the same really, it felt like 70 (well we had just fitted a new gearbox and needed to test 6th gear
) but was so comfortable. I have to have one.
160mph never is the same really, it felt like 70 (well we had just fitted a new gearbox and needed to test 6th gear
) but was so comfortable. I have to have one.
Graham - top geezer - welcome to the prog.
Gimme some details of your Porsche work ex - sounds quite interesting.
Which car/model (I assume Turbo) did you crack 160 in?
They really are impossible to drive legally and it's my intention to see 200+ on the readout when circs allow. So far I've seen over 190 (effin
I tell you) and I'm constantly thwacking 140, 150 and the odd 160/'sod it' 170 which is purely the product of criminal under use of the vehicle by yours truly.
From what I understand, the first vaguely non-lethal Turbo was the 964-based one but I get confused as hell for some reason with Turbo chronology - remember the one Tiff drove round MIRA on TG in the early 90s? That one, I think!
There were apparently upgrades to 400 bhp and I'm sure there's a loon on here who's in the possession of one of these nutters.
So much crap is spouted about Porsche and the 911 by people who often have never been exposed. Your enthusiasm is very well founded.
Gimme some details of your Porsche work ex - sounds quite interesting.
Which car/model (I assume Turbo) did you crack 160 in?
They really are impossible to drive legally and it's my intention to see 200+ on the readout when circs allow. So far I've seen over 190 (effin
I tell you) and I'm constantly thwacking 140, 150 and the odd 160/'sod it' 170 which is purely the product of criminal under use of the vehicle by yours truly. From what I understand, the first vaguely non-lethal Turbo was the 964-based one but I get confused as hell for some reason with Turbo chronology - remember the one Tiff drove round MIRA on TG in the early 90s? That one, I think!
There were apparently upgrades to 400 bhp and I'm sure there's a loon on here who's in the possession of one of these nutters.
So much crap is spouted about Porsche and the 911 by people who often have never been exposed. Your enthusiasm is very well founded.
Derestrictor,
My work experience was a 7 day program at AFN Service department in Guildford, I organised it myself and was the envy of my whole year, when my teacher came to visit, he wouldn't leave as there were about 8 porkas all in a big line being worked on.
I had quite a good knowledge of cars in general and my 'mentor' was quite happy for me to get on with stuff while he was doing other things, apparently the year before he had someone who wanted to be a golfer!!
But I did most things from basic servicing, top up of fluids etc etc, to a full on engine and gearbox removal on a 993 which I had to leave half way through. I would have loved to stay on. I was given a disc brake and the lower part of a steering column as I was a 'proper enthusiast'. My mentor also wrote me a letter which said...
The 160 was in a 996 turbo, which we had just changed the gearbox on as the tiptronics were duff on the old one. We were on a tight schedule and had just finished a service on a brand spanking new turbo (without reg plates) and some dosy blonde bint got her leather jacket stuck in the 'boot' (front end) of a boxster, while my mentor sorted that out I had to park the turbo outside. THAT DID IT FOR ME
I did around 2-3 test drives a day in boxsters to turbo's, it was the best 7 days of my life, I learnt so much and really didn't want to go. I will go back there when I get my Turbo serviced and probably to buy one (in quite a few years).
Manual or Tiptronic????
>> Edited by Graham.J on Friday 13th December 15:25
My work experience was a 7 day program at AFN Service department in Guildford, I organised it myself and was the envy of my whole year, when my teacher came to visit, he wouldn't leave as there were about 8 porkas all in a big line being worked on.
I had quite a good knowledge of cars in general and my 'mentor' was quite happy for me to get on with stuff while he was doing other things, apparently the year before he had someone who wanted to be a golfer!!
But I did most things from basic servicing, top up of fluids etc etc, to a full on engine and gearbox removal on a 993 which I had to leave half way through. I would have loved to stay on. I was given a disc brake and the lower part of a steering column as I was a 'proper enthusiast'. My mentor also wrote me a letter which said...
...it was a pleasure to work with someone who shared a genuine interest...don't forget to come back and say hello when your in the market to buy a new car.
The 160 was in a 996 turbo, which we had just changed the gearbox on as the tiptronics were duff on the old one. We were on a tight schedule and had just finished a service on a brand spanking new turbo (without reg plates) and some dosy blonde bint got her leather jacket stuck in the 'boot' (front end) of a boxster, while my mentor sorted that out I had to park the turbo outside. THAT DID IT FOR ME
I did around 2-3 test drives a day in boxsters to turbo's, it was the best 7 days of my life, I learnt so much and really didn't want to go. I will go back there when I get my Turbo serviced and probably to buy one (in quite a few years).
Manual or Tiptronic????
>> Edited by Graham.J on Friday 13th December 15:25
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