Indicators ALWAYS on

[jackal]

I've figured out a new style of driving on Motorways using your indictors ALL the time

been testing it out and I reckon it works pretty well so thought i'd put it to the PH massive

basically, you ALWAYS have either your left or right indicator on and here's how it works:




1. When you move to the fast lane or the outside lane you signal right and then as you stay in that outside lane you leave the indicator on as sometimes seen on the continent. It's a handy reminder to all around you that you don't intend being there forever and it also has a useful double function in that it indicates to any dithering "fast lane" hogging tts up ahead that they should move the fk out of the way (remember you are doing Mach 7, and although i'm sure they think they are Mr. Johnny Big Balls they are actually only going around 84mph)

2. When you are done overtaking in the outside or middle lanes you indicate left and pull into lane 1 or the inside 'slow' lane. You then leave your indicator signalling left for as long as you stay there. Why ? Well, it serves a useful function of informing any middle/fast lane tts behind you that they TOO SHOULD ALSO be moving into lane 1 after they have overtaken whatever it was they were overtaking. It's almost like you are leading the whole motorway and giving a police order for everyone behind you on the M1 to get the fk to the left. Remember, going into lane 1 doesn't make you some sort of sub-human proletariat bottom of the pile scumbag, you won't get infected with a weird virus and it doesn't mean that you are lower than anyone overtaking you in lane 2 or 3. Only in the UK, a country so obsessed with class, could lane 1 on the Motorway come to represent some sort of self-deprecating declaration of lower class status. It's not though, it's just a lane on a road and for the most part the one YOU should be in.

3. The final scenario is when you are overtaking something in lane 1 and are in lane 2 but don't need to go into lane 3 or lane 1 is generally nose to tail with lorries and very slow vehicles. You find yourself needing to stay in the middle lane for a small time. Basically you should signal mostly left if the Mway isn't that busy because chances are you will be pulling into lane 1 soon when its clear. You DO NOT want to give the impression that its OK to sit in lane 2 for miles on end. By signalling one way or t'other you are giving the distinct impression to everyone around you that the middle lane is very much a transitory place and only a weapons grade jockey-knob would sit in it for any significant length of time. If the Mway is quite busy then I guess the chances are you will need to move out to the outside before long to overtake someone so keep your right indicator on. Whilst you are waiting for that overtake opportunity to materlialise this signal also performs a useful additional function in that it warns anyone in the fast lane that you will SOON BE MOVING into lane 3 so they need to hurry up and get past you if you have a car looming up ahead in lane 2 (Don't you just hate that when people don't overtake you in time and you have to brake like hell to stop hitting the person up ahead in lane 2 ? This is especially infuriating if you have just moved into lane 2 to let Mr. "4x4/RS5 full beam" pass by only to see him slow down and force you to brake and drop 20 mph or so)


I think that's about it. As I say, seems to work well... you should try it.

Edited by jackal on Wednesday 17th November 23:21

[Flanders.]

You've spent to much time thinking about it.

[Mafioso]

What a ridiculous post and idea.

[busta]

What about when you pass a slip road but don't want to turn off? Do you then have to be in lane 2 indicating right?

And is it you I always see dawdling along lane 1 at 60mph, sometimes with a caravan on, with the right indicator permanently on?

[Monkeylegend]

Ever thought of becoming a traffic warden or something similar with a uniform?


Imagine the chaos if every car was doing this on the motorways during rush hour.This probably the most stupid idea I have heard for a long time, unless of course it only applied to BMW and Audi drivers

Edited by Monkeylegend on Thursday 18th November 08:43

Edited by Monkeylegend on Thursday 18th November 08:46

[hombrepaulo]

You sir are a fool

[CharlesdeGaulle]

I'm thinking that, without one of those daft icons, some of us have missed the whoosh. Has there been a sense of humour bypass anywhere?

Nice post I thought.

[jackal]

CharlesdeGaulle said:

I'm thinking that, without one of those daft icons, some of us have missed the whoosh. Has there been a sense of humour bypass anywhere?

Nice post I thought.

It's a strange place is Pistonheads !


It's almost as if 'internet' people these days are so looking for a fight or a way in which to denounce others and demonstrate themselves to be 'right' that they miss the point entirely.

[Mooster]

Genius

Although the current system of no indicators, horrendous tailgating, middle and fast (sic) lane hogging works so well, why would we ever want to change it?

[Tunku]

busta said:

And is it you I always see dawdling along lane 1 at 60mph, sometimes with a caravan on, with the right indicator permanently on?

No, that's probably me.

[hman]

Tunku said:

busta said:

And is it you I always see dawdling along lane 1 at 60mph, sometimes with a caravan on, with the right indicator permanently on?

No, that's probably me.

it could be me on my bike ( minus the caravan) the bloody indicators seem able to come on with the merest brush of a glove clad hand....

[GestapoWatch]

Driving in Portugal earlier this year, the outside lane indicator thing was commonplace and is used to indicate that the vehicle was there temporarily whilst overtaking.

Good fun driving over there I must say

[GBS2K]

It's a long shot, but it might just work!

Except for BMW drivers obviously.

[Petrolhead_Rich]

Erm, why not just keep left when not overtaking.

what about passing sliproads (already mentioned)
what about where the motorway splits into four lanes
what about approaching roundabouts, do i keep my left indicator on because i will be moving left at the roundabout?

OP:
10 points for trying to figure a way to resolve the lane hogs
10 points for thinking out of the box
-10 for trying to reinvent the wheel
-10 for coming up with a really rather ridiculous solution

Overall Score = Zero!

[GestapoWatch]

GBS2K said:

It's a long shot, but it might just work!

Except for BMW drivers obviously.

Snore... I thought this was Audi drivers nowadays 'cos Clarkson said so

[adycav]

I like - and am amused by - your late night soliloquys Rich, but isn't there something more important that you should be doing?

[V8mate]

A warning to us all. This is what 121 months on PH does to you.

[jackal]

adycav said:

I like - and am amused by - your late night soliloquys Rich, but isn't there something more important that you should be doing?

just been enjoying and driving so not much to add at the mo im afraid ady

[tertius]

I love it, I think its an excellent idea.

Fortunately I have a BMW so I plan to simply have my hazards on the whole time - everyone else can work out whether I'm about to move left or right from the context. Its only a short step from not using them at all, so I think I can cope ...