The advanced bargers handbook to avoiding borkness?

[jimxms]

Does such a thing already exist, if so can someone point me in the right direction?

I'm looking for a checklist-of-sorts that will guide a newbie barger like myself away from potential bork'ness.

The internet has plenty of 'used car buying guides', but they very rarely get more detailed than checking the service history, running a finance check...etc. I'm thinking more along the lines of:

- avoid cars with aftermarket parts or dubious stickers
- question pictures of cars parked on grass rather than road
- look for suspension even'ness in photos
- work out if pictures of car are avoiding certain areas

Then if you go to see it, things like:

- check for creamy muck muck on dip stick
- check all fluids at correct levels
- check all lights (ABS/TRC/Engine) come up on dash during start
- Look for damage around cluster which might indicate removal
- Make sure car comes up to temperature within x minutes


If we don;t have a list, maybe we could get something going?

[CampDavid]

Check prices of inocuous parts and home in on them. Some barges have dampers which can run to a £1000, others have expensive sensors or weird foibles, i'm thinking the highly perishable E38 fuel tank.

Seek out owners on here and see what they say

[Dr Doofenshmirtz]

Assuming it's a private buy.
Good:
Nice house/area.
Being invited in for a cup of tea whilst you check the paperwork.
Paperwork is presented in a nice folder with a bundle of receipts.
All tyres are a decent brand with even tread.
Interior is clean and hoovered.
Inside lip of rear arch is clean, indicating properly cleaned and looked after.

Bad:
Meeting in a local lay-by the only option offered.
The 'paperwork' is just the tatty V5.
Car is being sold 'for a mate'.
Tyres are all different makes, and unheard of brands (=equally cheap/non-existent servicing).
Car is dirty inside and out.
Recent big bills = the car still has problems and will cost yet more money very soon.

[mrtwisty]

Start an 'advice needed' thread a few days before going to see any particular car. (include pictures of your OH/Sister/Mum for quick response time)

The PH knowledge-base (and level of depravity) is truly phenomenal.

[joebongo]

My E38 had it's tank replaced a couple of years back costing >£2000.

I'd add look at the presence or otherwise of the little things like the rechargeable torch in the glove box of E38's and the first aid kit and the toolkit.

Check the aircon pusher fan works properly.

See if there is excessive play in the exhaust as that can be a biggie on a barge.

Maybe get an OBD reader and check the codes?

[Huntsman]

As others have said, always buy at this end of the market privately, buy from nice people in a nice area, buy older cars that were better when built than newer st cars.

[hornetrider]

Step 1. Post the car on the Barge thread to be pulled apart by the threadistas.

The end.

[jimxms]

hornetrider said:

Step 1. Post the car on the Barge thread to be pulled apart by the threadistas.

The end.

That only helps you up to the point of deciding whether to view it or not though.

Sure you can just start another 'what to look for' thread, but its handy to have something less specific you can also print off when searching for bork.