Car buyers on submarines

[RUSSELLM]

My Dad's currently got his car on the classifieds & has received the following.....

Submariner said:

Mac,
Thanks for the email, i am away at sea, on the east ariel submersible
to be precise, i do not have access to phone for now,its 15 days off
and 15 days on,which is why I contacted you with internet messaging
service and I need to buy this asap.How much are you looking to sell the rolls?,
It will be going to my Dad in Malta . Where is the car located at the
moment?

I am buying the car for my dad as a surprise gift,he will love this so so much and there can be no other b'day gift for him than this,he is an enthusiast to the very core,i should have done this a while back,but my job is so demanding and tasking I have not been able to get around to it and I want it delivered asap, but I have already talked to a freighting company that will handle the pick up and delivery to him, I really like the pics I saw on , do you have pics of the engine? have you done any mods on the car?

As regards the payment, I will only be able to pay through paypal as its the easiest means of paying for me, i hope you will accommodate me on this,i cannot access my bank a/c through the internet but i have it attached to my paypal acc, it is easy to set up at www.paypal.co.uk , all i will need is your paypal email address, i will also take care of
the paypal charges.
Wishing you a magical new year!.
Cheers!

My Dad said:

Hi Adrian, I to am currently away at sea.

I've only recently got my job back & I don't want to take the piss by hogging the computer in the Captain's Quarters.

I previously served on the Nautilus submarine for a period of Three days at Gosport. However I was honourably discharged after Three days. The reason for my discharge was that whilst at sea, I forgot my bearings & unfortunately left the port hole ajar, as I like to sleep with the window open. I was returned to port by a passing P&O ferry along with my crew, or at least, most of them.

I'll be back in touch when I reach land in October, so it's Ay Ay matey from me & I'll speak to you later in the year.

All the best.

Mac

Anyone else had this one yet ?

[VR6 Turbo]

nice reply.

VR

[Sulli]

love it, your dad's a funny bloke

[cheadle hulme]

Hows he going to get the car to Malta? Don't think hes thought this through....

[Johnzh]

Not only cars but it would seem aircraft are of interest to this individual

I received this e-mail earlier today in response to an aircraft advertisment in order to sell my aircraft

John,
Thanks for the email, i am away at sea, on the east ariel submersible to be precise, i do not have access to phone for now,its 15 days off and 15 days on and I need to buy this asap.How much are you looking to sell the aircraft?,It will be going to my Dad in Malta.

I am buying this for my dad as a surprise gift,he will love this so so much and there can be no other b'day gift for him than this,He is an enthusiast! I should have done this a while back,but my job is so demanding and tasking I have not been able to get around to it and I want it delivered asap, but I have already talked to a freighting company that will handle the pick up and delivery to him.They have their own engineer who will come with them for the pickup processing and inspection.Can you please email me more pics? why are you selling if you don't mind my asking? and what is the cruise speed knots, what fuel does it burn? and what is the fuel capacity? does the aircraft have any accident/damage history I should be aware of?, when will the annual be due?

As regards the payment, I will only be able to pay through paypal as its the easiest means of paying for me, i hope you will accommodate me on this, i cannot access my bank a/c through the internet but I have it attached to my paypal acc, it is easy to set up at www.paypal.com, all i will need is your paypal email address, I will also take care of the paypal charges.
Cheers!
Adrian


My response was:-

Hi Adrian,

Thanks for your quick reply and your enthusiasm to purchase my aircraft.

Unfortunately I can’t send you any more pictures of the aircraft at the moment because of the incredible performance of this particular Mooney M20E it is highly classified. I have it on good authority that anyone who sees it without authorisation, the Secret Service have been given instructions to “gouge out the eyes, cut out their tongue and rip off their fingers” so that they can’t communicate details about it to anyone else, obviously once it is in your possession you will be given the necessary authority to not only see it bit to fly it. You will need to operate it from Malta in the equivalent of the US Military’s Area 51 and only take off and landings are allowed during moonless nights in case anyone is quick enough to look up and glance a look at it. To give you an indication of what it looks like just type “SR-71 Blackbird” into Google and it will give you a clue.

Like you, I am also going to be away for a while; in fact I’m off to the International Space Station later today for a three month stint to conduct tests to determine whether people are more or less gullible when subject to weightlessness.

I checked with the Director for ‘Off This Planet’ Flight Operations at NASA and he said that they will be happy to meet your father on the Mongolian Steppes when I de-orbit in April and as a surprise they could arrange to have the aircraft shipped over there to present to him, that is if you could arrange his travel, (maybe on the pretence that Elvis Presley has been found alive on the moon very much overweight after eating lots of chees, he is presently on the ISS on a strict diet of seaweed and garden worms (which have all been grown in space) once he is down to 20 stones and can survive Earth’s gravity he has agreed to return to Earth for one more gig in Moscow before retiring to Mars.)

Don’t worry about paying for the aircraft, if you want to give it to your father as a present then the least I can do is to let you take it away on a 10 year trial - of course if anytime during that period he or you aren’t satisfied with it, then just return it, no questions asked.

Of course, it’s only right that I should pay for all fuel and maintenance during the trial so please send me your bank details and I can make an initial deposit straight away just to reassure you of my gratitude that you are honouring me in letting me lend you my aircraft. Also, if you send me your Father’s contact details including his address, telephone number and inside leg measurements, as well as his, Pilot licence number, experience on type, details of which ratings he holds and with which aviation authority I can arrange the insurance for him also.

By the way I see that the Barefoot Bandit has been sentenced to 7 and 6½ years concurrently for stealing other people’s aircraft. Very unreasonable of the American courts don’t you think?

All joking apart, you are headed for the fires of eternal damnation my friend; repent, confess your sins to God (who knows about every one of them far better than I do), place your trust in His Son the Lord Jesus Christ for your redemption, acknowledge that He bore the punishment due to you for your rebellion against God and ask Him to cleanse you, make you into a new person with a new nature and a new heart and take your life from that of being a meaningless wretch to a worthy and worthwhile son of God.

I John 1:9;10 If we confess our sins He is worthy to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness, if we say that we have not sinned then we make Him a liar and His word is not in us.

I hope this is helpful.

John Holme
Ambassador to the kingdom of God.

[VR6 Turbo]

Johnzh said:

Not only cars but it would seem aircraft are of interest to this individual

I received this e-mail earlier today in response to an aircraft advertisment in order to sell my aircraft

(piss taking emails)

John Holme
Ambassador to the kingdom of God.

Please tell me he's responded?

VR

[LotusOmega375D]

To be fair to the subsea fraudster, he must gets loads of funny replies like these to cheer him up.

He'll probably compile them into a best-selling book and make his fortune that way!

[John Wiggett]

We as well have an aircraft for sale, & have it on a few different sites, we now have two people who have requested us sell them the aircraft. This is how I came across this website. I was doing a search on "East Ariel Submersible" just to see what it was as we have never heard of it before. The only difference is our chap is a George Mahoon. Must be a friend of Adrian I am freshly joined on here I will wait out the qualifying period then put it on here. The other one we had is a Micheal Beecher who has seen our ad & wants to know price & our location both of which are prominent in the ad. Both of these I noticed have got gmail accounts I was told this is so they can't be traced not sure if this is so or not. I mentioned to the chap from East ariel submersible that I had found a site on East ariel submersible and to say Hi to Andrian for us.
John

[hidetheelephants]

Johnzh said:

funny stuff

Top lurking my good man! First ever post after waiting 92 months must be a PH record.

[Carfiend]

I had a couple of oceanographers trying to buy cars for their son/dads/uncles.

[Nedzilla]

I wouldn't even give him the time of day to write a reply.

[daz3210]

What exactly is the fraud though?

Buy the car then reclaim money through paypal?

[kentmotorcompany]

Johnzh said:

Not only cars but it would seem aircraft are of interest to this individual

I received this e-mail earlier today in response to an aircraft advertisment in order to sell my aircraft

John,
Thanks for the email, i am away at sea, on the east ariel submersible to be precise, i do not have access to phone for now,its 15 days off and 15 days on and I need to buy this asap.How much are you looking to sell the aircraft?,It will be going to my Dad in Malta.

I am buying this for my dad as a surprise gift,he will love this so so much and there can be no other b'day gift for him than this,He is an enthusiast! I should have done this a while back,but my job is so demanding and tasking I have not been able to get around to it and I want it delivered asap, but I have already talked to a freighting company that will handle the pick up and delivery to him.They have their own engineer who will come with them for the pickup processing and inspection.Can you please email me more pics? why are you selling if you don't mind my asking? and what is the cruise speed knots, what fuel does it burn? and what is the fuel capacity? does the aircraft have any accident/damage history I should be aware of?, when will the annual be due?

As regards the payment, I will only be able to pay through paypal as its the easiest means of paying for me, i hope you will accommodate me on this, i cannot access my bank a/c through the internet but I have it attached to my paypal acc, it is easy to set up at www.paypal.com, all i will need is your paypal email address, I will also take care of the paypal charges.
Cheers!
Adrian


My response was:-

Hi Adrian,

Thanks for your quick reply and your enthusiasm to purchase my aircraft.

Unfortunately I can’t send you any more pictures of the aircraft at the moment because of the incredible performance of this particular Mooney M20E it is highly classified. I have it on good authority that anyone who sees it without authorisation, the Secret Service have been given instructions to “gouge out the eyes, cut out their tongue and rip off their fingers” so that they can’t communicate details about it to anyone else, obviously once it is in your possession you will be given the necessary authority to not only see it bit to fly it. You will need to operate it from Malta in the equivalent of the US Military’s Area 51 and only take off and landings are allowed during moonless nights in case anyone is quick enough to look up and glance a look at it. To give you an indication of what it looks like just type “SR-71 Blackbird” into Google and it will give you a clue.

Like you, I am also going to be away for a while; in fact I’m off to the International Space Station later today for a three month stint to conduct tests to determine whether people are more or less gullible when subject to weightlessness.

I checked with the Director for ‘Off This Planet’ Flight Operations at NASA and he said that they will be happy to meet your father on the Mongolian Steppes when I de-orbit in April and as a surprise they could arrange to have the aircraft shipped over there to present to him, that is if you could arrange his travel, (maybe on the pretence that Elvis Presley has been found alive on the moon very much overweight after eating lots of chees, he is presently on the ISS on a strict diet of seaweed and garden worms (which have all been grown in space) once he is down to 20 stones and can survive Earth’s gravity he has agreed to return to Earth for one more gig in Moscow before retiring to Mars.)

Don’t worry about paying for the aircraft, if you want to give it to your father as a present then the least I can do is to let you take it away on a 10 year trial - of course if anytime during that period he or you aren’t satisfied with it, then just return it, no questions asked.

Of course, it’s only right that I should pay for all fuel and maintenance during the trial so please send me your bank details and I can make an initial deposit straight away just to reassure you of my gratitude that you are honouring me in letting me lend you my aircraft. Also, if you send me your Father’s contact details including his address, telephone number and inside leg measurements, as well as his, Pilot licence number, experience on type, details of which ratings he holds and with which aviation authority I can arrange the insurance for him also.

By the way I see that the Barefoot Bandit has been sentenced to 7 and 6½ years concurrently for stealing other people’s aircraft. Very unreasonable of the American courts don’t you think?

All joking apart, you are headed for the fires of eternal damnation my friend; repent, confess your sins to God (who knows about every one of them far better than I do), place your trust in His Son the Lord Jesus Christ for your redemption, acknowledge that He bore the punishment due to you for your rebellion against God and ask Him to cleanse you, make you into a new person with a new nature and a new heart and take your life from that of being a meaningless wretch to a worthy and worthwhile son of God.

I John 1:9;10 If we confess our sins He is worthy to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness, if we say that we have not sinned then we make Him a liar and His word is not in us.

I hope this is helpful.

John Holme
Ambassador to the kingdom of God.

Nice reply and even better top lurking.
Seven and a half years per post. I'll look forward to the next one!

[Wycombe83]

I think I posted a topic of a similar nature.
I honestly almost fell for it too.

[Baryonyx]

The first two emails I had when I advertised my MR2 Turbo were from people on oil rigs, looking to buy a car for their dads!

I didn't bother with a witty reply, just told them it's cash on collection and they can come and see if if they want!