Will a small retired gentleman explode in an Alfa Romeo?

[Gorvid]

Hello

My old man is a dustman a small retired gentleman and he has a bit of a thing about diesels.

He's had a few cool cars over the years (including a vinyl-roofed Capri in the 80s.... oh yeah) but for some reason, as he has gotten olderer, he's become a bit obsessed with all sorts of false economies surrounding the perversions that are diesel cars.

Oh well...

But wait!

The other day he was talking about lobbing his current car in and getting something "a bit more interesting". Well, as you can well imagine, this made my tiny ears stand up with interest, like a metaphorical phallus in a sauna full of vaginas.

At least, until he added: "but still a diesel, obviously...."

Flaccid.

So this is where this comes in, look:


http://www.pistonheads.com/sales/3886307.htm

This, apparently, does 44mpg and is a still a diesel, but yet looks pretty cool and, apparently, has 265BHP to go with the sultry Italian sex leather.

Sex leather.

So my question is: What happens when you put a small retired gentleman inside an Alfa Romeo?

Do these things explode?

Do they tell lies?

Or can we bring him back from the brink of mundane rigmarole?

Many thanks.

Edited by Gorvid on Tuesday 8th May 21:32

[miniman]

Mmmmmmmmm... Teledials

[deltashad]

One of the best looking saloon cars.

I'm guessing that you're talking about the 2.4jtdm, it's gonna go like the clappers.

I don't think your dad will 'explode' in the sex leather. (this is sounding very S&M)

I think you're taking a bit of a risk buying a used Fiat corporation product. Any used car is a gamble though and a used Alfa is probably more risky. Saying that, it wouldn't put me off.

All cars tell lies, but it's also all dependant on how you drive the car. I got 36mpg out of a 3.2 v6 merc the other day. Amazing.

Exploding sex leather and your father

[HustleRussell]

He probably will explode in the sex leather within a minute. Then he'll be embarrassed.

[williredale]

mmm... look at it... he will explode!

[Garlick]

That's gorgeous

[Gorvid]

I suppose my real worries, initially, were centred around the car exploding. But my poorly written explanation of this has revealed a whole new concern now.

Exploding Dad.

[Jimmy No Hands]

This is all sounding a bit Lemon Party.

[Gorvid]

And another thing...

Is that kind of updated power claim feasible?

200BHP standard, then a claimed 265BHP by nailing on a Monkeydonkey or something?

[HeatonNorris]

265bhp isn't an impossible increase in power - but it won't be doing anything like 44mpg if you use that power.

They can barely do that as standard.

[V6Alfisti]

Lovely and the 159/Brera generation are very solid.

Suspension is stronger than the 156 generation, engines are strong but I think some early 2.4's had problems with the inlet manifold but most were replaced.

Oh and power steering racks can have play at the ends (but third party tie rod ends are now available)and tyres wear quickly if not correctly aligned (a quick 4 wheel alignment will sort that!). When you consider those are the biggies to be looking out for on this car, shows you how strong they really are!.

The 159 would be getting my ££ if I was in the market, would be very surprised if he didn't like it but not sure the 159 diesel is as good on fuel as quoted.

[Backtobasics]

I've got a 159 3.2 q4. Had no more problems than the average car. Nice to be different from the a6, 5 series brigade.

[Efbe]

Gorvid said:

And another thing...

Is that kind of updated power claim feasible?

200BHP standard, then a claimed 265BHP by nailing on a Monkeydonkey or something?

yes it is reasonable.

I recently bought a 159 1.9 jtdm sportwagon.
It comes with 150bhp, however a common conversion is to remove the DPF and retune to approximately 180bhp. This is usually done to save a bit of money in replacing the DPF when required and to get a bit more power with an increase mpg. I will be doing this in due course.
the 2.4jtdm pulls out around the 200bhp mark iirc, but much worse mpg. I think 44 is dreamland tbh. I would also say that though the DPF removal and remap *could* attain the mpg claimed above, you would really want to know who has done it or where it was done. I would expect more like 250bhp from doing this though. usually with a turbo diesel you can clock them up as much as you want, It will just reduce the life of the engine.

It will be quite obvious if done badly as it will smoke like a steamtrain.

for more info, these are respected places for the work to be done at: (according to alfa forums!)
http://www.alfatunemotorsport.co.uk/
http://www.alfacare.co.uk/Servicing/alfa_remaps.ph...

[rallycross]

Diesel Alfa = automotive self harm.

An Alfa Romeo should be all about the engine and not lumbered with some smoking rattling noisy diseasel lump in the place of a glorious wailing twin cam or V6.

[PTE993]

I recently bought a 159 Sportwagon of a similar vintage. Mine is a 1.9 not 2.4. So not a comparison for performance, the 2.4 with remap etc will have a lot more go. If MPG is of interest (suspect it is based on what you have said) then I get about 40MPG on a very steady 70ish and paying attention to my driving style. On mixed driving and with a more 'spirited' drive it drops to around 36MPG.

Build quality is actually pretty reasonable. Despite being relatively low power it is an enjoyable drive. They do look fantastic and are not that common on the roads.

If you are buying from a dealer I assume you will get a warranty of some sort. From the research I did I don't think the Alfa diesels are any better or worse than equivalents from other manufacturers for reliability.

[HeatonNorris]

rallycross said:

Diesel Alfa = automotive self harm.

An Alfa Romeo should be all about the engine and not lumbered with some smoking rattling noisy diseasel lump in the place of a glorious wailing twin cam or V6.

You haven't driven anything with that 5-pot diesel, have you?

[Flying Toaster]

My dad used to have one. It was a lovely car, had a great interior and was quite nice as far as diesels go, although between a 2.4 and the V6 there's no contest! Didn't break down, but then it wouldn't doing 9000 miles from new over 4 years! Usually returned mid 20's or 30's on motorways. I think the later ones have 210 BHP as opposed to 200, and i think they should get better MPG, but I wouldn't be expecting mpg in the 40's.

[Efbe]

PTE993 said:

I recently bought a 159 Sportwagon of a similar vintage. Mine is a 1.9 not 2.4. So not a comparison for performance, the 2.4 with remap etc will have a lot more go. If MPG is of interest (suspect it is based on what you have said) then I get about 40MPG on a very steady 70ish and paying attention to my driving style. On mixed driving and with a more 'spirited' drive it drops to around 36MPG.

Build quality is actually pretty reasonable. Despite being relatively low power it is an enjoyable drive. They do look fantastic and are not that common on the roads.

If you are buying from a dealer I assume you will get a warranty of some sort. From the research I did I don't think the Alfa diesels are any better or worse than equivalents from other manufacturers for reliability.

snap, recently bought a 2007 one as well.

good taste that man!

[fozzymandeus]

He will grow a moustache and start wearing wayfarers, but other than that it'd be epic.

if you must have a diesel, Alfa get the closest to having some character in their engine notes. The 2.4 actually has some charisma.

A 159 must be black so you can be a vague movie euro-villain.

[CDP]

Well at least with the leather interior if he does explode you can wipe it clean.