Left myself a present in my car (juvenile content warning)
Discussion
This is disgusting, way below my normal posts, and not for grown-ups. But it did make me laugh earlier. So I am sharing it for fun 
Came home tonight, parked the car, got out, went inside.
Realised after 5 minutes that I had left my phone in the centre console of the car (again, like....keep doing it!)
Went back outside, opened the door, reached in to retrieve my phone....and was forced to enjoy, in spectacular olfactory high definition - the smell of the massive fart I had done in the car before I first got out of it!
It actually made me catch my breath and nearly gag - and once I had pulled myself out of the car, I nearly collapsed in hysterics. Anyone walking by at that point would have thought (confirmed?) that I was a total mentalist!
Anyway. As you were
Came home tonight, parked the car, got out, went inside.
Realised after 5 minutes that I had left my phone in the centre console of the car (again, like....keep doing it!)
Went back outside, opened the door, reached in to retrieve my phone....and was forced to enjoy, in spectacular olfactory high definition - the smell of the massive fart I had done in the car before I first got out of it!
It actually made me catch my breath and nearly gag - and once I had pulled myself out of the car, I nearly collapsed in hysterics. Anyone walking by at that point would have thought (confirmed?) that I was a total mentalist!
Anyway. As you were
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